Hmmm, which would choose?

1. backing into a potato chip packing machine & getting a gash bruise on your ass? and having to have a supervisor fill out the injury form on that?
2. Tripping on acid in a bra & panties in slick new boots, doing a kick boxing move thus going airborne & breaking your wrist with your hip upon landing?

It’s a tie between two instances. A few weeks ago I gave myself a black eye practicing tornado spins with nunchucks when I heard a loud rustle of leaves, turned my head and smacked myself right across the ocular cavity. It was a squirrel.

Maybe 7 or 8 years ago when I was drinking too much a friend and I got in an argument over which drug inhibits fear more: alcohol or molly? He argued Molly and I argued alcohol. This evolved into a bet over which of us had the balls to jump in the river down at a local park in the middle of the night. Neither of us were on molly, both of us were drunk so I’m not sure what this was supposed to prove. I “won” because the path down to the river was covered in sharp rocks and he couldn’t make it down them barefoot while I shimmied down with no problem. On my way back up though my toes slipped under my feet and when I got back home and took my wet sock off I realized I had donated my pinky toenail to the river. It was completely torn off n I didn’t even notice lol.

We could be rich if all this was on youtube!

Doing a front handspring on a roller skating rink with my roller skates on....body went forward, feet/skates stayed back, and broke all 5 toes at the same time. Had to be cut out of my skate because I skated for another 2 hours before noticing it hurt like hell and by the time I noticed, my foot/lower leg was swollen to the point that it couldn't be taken off.

Fell out of the back of a station wagon during my senior year in high school and broke my tail bone. Yes, alcohol was involved.

I shot myself right above my upper lip with an arrow. How does one do that???

See my name here, there's too many for a full review but last year I fell down ONE step and fractured my shoulder blade. The ER doc almost called me a liar but still have me a monster oxy script.

Side note, oxy can be a truth serum, DO NOT call an ex for help if stoned

Walking. Getting in a truck. I once split my abdominal muscles open and needed surgery because I laid with my head off the bed and got stuck

We had a several ton steel beam to hold up the basement of a house. I tried to lift it and set it on the beam pocket from above. It tried to pull me into the basement with it when it fell. I hooked my leg on the foundation instinctively and caught a steel anchor bolt with my calf. It kept me from falling by ripping an inch wide gap through my flesh, 5" long. The pain was exquisite for days.

Making my bed and the fitted sheet caught my finger and popped the tendon in my first knuckle didnt really hurt and can't be fixed really kind of a waste of time but it is not straight end bends also when i was a kid used a pencil to open a box missed the tape rammed it in my wrist i can still see the lead mark

After thinking it over, the list is to long to get into, and reminded me that l must not be very bright.

I slipped on some water, causing me to dislocate a kneecap twelve years ago.

Being circumsised when I was born ?

Swimming in a pool doing the backstroke and twanged my head against the side of the pool, 4 stitches and humongous headache all day. I was 14 yrs.old

Fell out the back of a swing when I was a kid and gave myself a concussion.

Another time, a kid kicked a ball at recess once and accidentally smacked my head into a wall, giving me a concussion.

One of my main hobbies involves gaming miniatures, which I have to trim and clean with an X-acto knife. I end up absent-mindedly stabbing myself in the finger just about every time.

A few years back I did something to really mess up my neck - wrenched the hell out of it. One day, while nursing it, I got out of bed too quickly and ended up wrenching it even harder. I had a flash of intense pain and blacked out. When I woke up, I found that I'd fallen against the wall and destroyed the cord for a power strip plugged in there. The rest of the cord was unplugged in the process but the "ground" plug was broken off in the wall socket and had given me a four-inch gash across my back

Reached for a glass door.
Put my hand through it.
Glass sliced my left inner wrist.
Lost a lot of blood but lived to laugh about it.
Makes interesting conversation too...'so...how'd you get that scar across your wrist ?' they hesitantly ask.