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So. Self esteem has a lot to do with happiness, general satisfaction, and how you handle the darker parts of life. I'm going to do one of those totally cliche things and ask YOU to list 5 extraordinary things YOU think about yourself. It's an exercise in introspection. And its an exercise in examining your own insecurities. If you think of something, list it - don't argue with yourself if its true, or how it will look to others, or if you have enough required modesty not be seen as a braggart. I'll even start, since, I've been wrestling with this for about 5 months now, and I think I have a decent list going...

  1. I'm smarter than the average bear.
  2. I'm quick witted.
  3. I have a very "live and let live" kind of outlook on life.
  4. I am pretty, and maybe even slightly sexy.
  5. Still intact, even after all the shit, is my generosity and a penchant for empathy

Also, you MUST STATE these things in a positive way, as fact. None of this "I feel I am..." or "I think maybe..." bullshit.

(yeah yeah, I'm running, I'm about to run, I'm getting up from the computer...)

onlyduh 7 June 17

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all the same . I will add I am stronger than the average bear

btroje Level 9 June 17, 2018
  1. I unconditionally love myself, which allows me to unconditionally love others.

  2. I'm kind.

  3. I'm compassionate.

  4. I only rarely get upset and almost never get angry.

  5. I'm comfortable to be with.

  1. I'm pretty smart.
  2. I'm a talented writer.
  3. I'm a talented musician.
  4. I'm a good father.
  5. I'm a good friend.
  1. I act like a "know it all"
  2. I am aware that I really know nothing
  3. I attract men & women
  4. I love the planet
  5. My horoscope characteristics are true

@onlyduh The request is to list 5 extraordinary characteristics about yourself. Not what I like about myself. It is extraordinary that I act like a know it all, because I usually do, even tho I know I don't. I don't like that my horoscope characteristics are true (even tho I do) It is something I know to be true about myself.

  1. I'm smart/intelligent

  2. I like my intellect

  3. I'm resourceful

  4. I'm Kind

  5. I have the patience of Job (Can't think of a secular equivalent but you get the idea)

  6. I'm not someone that's fanciable or I'm too thick to notice

  7. I can't count

  8. I have a Monty Python, Blackadder, Red Dwarf inspired sense of humour

  9. I have no patience for wankers in spite of No 5

  10. I'll always use 10 words when 5 would have done 🙂

ipdg77 Level 8 June 17, 2018

@onlyduh I just got carried away and thought what the hell lol


Love this even though it will be as difficult as fuck to goes:

  1. Life has left me battered, bruised and beaten up but I am still here and I am still winning!
  2. I am intelligent and funny
  3. I am uniquely attractive
  4. I am mean
  5. I am loving
  1. I'm IQ
  2. I have a "water off a duck's back" outlook
  3. I'm a brilliant poet
  4. I've got a massive willie
  5. I can really bullshit.
Petter Level 9 June 17, 2018
  1. I am loyal.

  2. I can retain large amounts of useless knowledge.

  3. I scraped and clawed my way up at work and now love my job.

  4. I don't give up. I've been called a bull dog.

  5. I rescue animals.


Sorry, l don't find anything about myself extraordinary. There are things l like about myself, but extraordinary would be a stretch. ?

  1. I am proud of being compassionate
  2. I’m a good support person, not everyone can be a leader, I’m happy to support those in charge and I’m good at it.
  3. I’m generally a very happy person and think that I can lift others up as well
  4. I fiercely stand up for those I love
  5. Overall I’m a content person and am not jealous of what others have

@onlyduh what do you mean by grok? Guessing I know but I suck at self esteem

@onlyduh that makes it clear as mud! Lol

@onlyduh I did read that. Perhaps I’m just thick


I’m a human lie detector.
Empathy is one of my superpowers.
I have great breasts.
Fools, bigots, and hypocrites: don’t suffer them at all.
My Southern cooking can make a grown man cry. HAS.
Bonus: I learn from my mistakes.

@onlyduh It’s a small city, 20,000 or so...I’ve been here about a year and don’t know many folks, other than my family.


1.- I am awesome
2.- I am awesome
3.- I am awesome
4.- I am awesome
5.- I am awesome
Gotta keep telling me that..

Throw in some examples of how you are awesome and I believe you'll be on the right track.

@HippieChick58 can't reveal my inner secrets before developing a minimum level of aqcuintance.... Or you tell me one then I'll return the favor

@IamNobody How I am awesome. I am a great mom. My kids know when they need me I will drop everything to help out. Yes, I even used PTO after my grandson was born to help out, thank goodness my manager is understanding. I would lay down my life for my kids, I'd give body parts if they needed it.

@onlyduh ????

@HippieChick58 oky doky, I believe in equality and balance. How I am awesome.... I raised my daughters to become freethinkers. They have no sense of guilt about anything and they understand they have the freedom to choose whatever belief (or lack of) they may want.... Actually today my oldest brought my little buddy ( he is three months old ) and I brought up the subject on how is she going to rise her boy and she gave me this loving look and told me "you know Dad, same thing you did with us"..... On that department I am pretty happy with the results

@IamNobody Sounds like you did a great job with your kids. That says you were an involved dad, and that IS awesome. When your kids look to you as an example that is the best feeling in the world. Your little buddy seems to be about a month older than my little buddy. My belief is that if you are a good parent/grand parent then you have other things going for you. Awesomeness doesn't happen in a vacuum.

@HippieChick58 you know what am I going to say next?.... And yet cannot get a date !!! ????

@IamNobody Well, sugar, I feel your pain. I remember who my last date was, I remember where, and I don't remember exactly when. I remember the last male to join me in my bedroom, and I'm thinking it was more than 2 years ago. I don't think I'm unlovable, but I'm batting zero. So I don't know what the hell to tell you except I feel your pain and I'm in the same leaky boat. And I wish to hell I wasn't but what are we gonna do? What I do know is that I am worth the effort, as you are. I'm not going to settle for just anyone, I tried that once. I deserve better, as do you. What I do know is that I am going to continue living my life as I have been, I'm not waiting for Prince Charming, or even Minion Not So Charming. I will do it the best I can and with all the style and grace I can find. If I find someone that will be great. If I don't I will still have lived a full life. I used to ask what the hell is wrong with me that I can't get a date? Now I know there is nothing "wrong" with me, I'm just not everyone's cup of tea. And not everyone is mine. That's OK. I wish I could say I'm not going to lose sleep over it, but after picking this scab off tonight is likely not to be a good night. The one thing that I am for damn certain of is that I am a survivor. I'm going to be OK, and I'm not going to settle. And you will be OK too.

@HippieChick58 You know, it is the same boat, no doubt. It's just different route or schedule. It is what it is. I started feeling this way few months ago but that's a long story. I am glad you are making progress and moving forward. I am still stuck on "what a hell is wrong with me??". I have started to realize the decline starts now and I thought I wasn't ready to call it quits, I still was hoping for something but now I keep getting closer one day at the time to make peace with it. I have my job and all the time in the world. Until recently, used to go out to a bar around the block but cannot stand drinking a couple of beers anymore. Never have had beer at home, drinking at the bar was a necessity for the opportunity to talk to someone... Well, I have found a new love that is keeping me busy. I am dwelling on Game of Thrones, episode by episode, developing a Word document with names, places, quotes, funny words, who has died, you name it. The best part of it, my day after work goes by fast and I am not in any hurry to finish it. When that happens, I'll move into the next show whatever. I like to read but life is just fucking evil (excuse my French) and keeps making it harder for me to read. Anyhow, sorry about the long story and thank you very much for your thoughtful narrative. Hope you'll have a nice night.

@IamNobody You have to accept that nothing is wrong with you, or with me. We just got put on the path less traveled. I just chose to be the best me I could be. I think you have too. I did good with my kids, you did too. I dunno why I'm not finding someone, but I'm going to be me because that is all I can be. I think your hobby is adorkable. My kids would love talking to you. I've never watched GOT, they are huge fans. But be the best you that you can be, and sometimes that has to be enough.

@HippieChick58 At this point, it has to be enough. That's what I am trying to work on now. Thanks

  1. I can read people very well. It's frightening at times
  2. I provide a loving home to my son's friends most of whom have difficult circumstances within their family
  3. I have amicably met with public school officials to talk and educate on LGBTQ sensitivity
  4. I know what I suck at
  5. I have accomplished being friends with my ex husband.
  1. I'm resourceful
  2. I'm patient
  3. I'm curious
  4. I don't air my laundry on social media
  5. I'm usually pretty upbeat (almost like those people in the Discover commercials)

I am thoughtful.
I am sensitive.
I have a wicked sense of humor.
I am creative.
I am worthy of love.


I am an encourager. I will tell you the truth always, and I will point you in what I believe to be the right direction and I will tell you you're better than you think you are. Then I will let you do that hard work but I will continue to encourage and cheer you on.

I have done shit I shouldn't have, and luckily lived to tell the tale which has given me great experiences and hopefully some wisdom.

I'm pretty damn smart and that has also sprung form the doing shit I shouldn't have.

I'm laid back, I don't get my garters in a knot for stuff that just isn't going to matter tomorrow or next week.

I am a Mama Bear. If you mess with my kids I will grind your bones to bake my bread. If you've become my friend I will Mama Bear if I think it is needed.

  1. I can sense dark intent.
  2. I am courageous.
  3. I make magic happen.
  4. I have a unique aesthetic.
  5. I love all beings.
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