My answer... works for many questions from religious people...

Me: "Depends, which god?"
Them: "There's only one god, the Christian one!"
Me: "Oh, you mean Yahweh?"
Them: "What?"
Me: "the god in the Old Testament is named Yahweh"
Them: "I meant Jesus!!"
Me: "Aren't they the same, father/son/spirit?"

You can see where this goes...

I'd kick the fucker in his hairy white balls.

I'd ask "Why did I have to die to meet you?"

"Even if your God WERE real, I would not worship it."

I always find this question silly and not worthy of an answer. I don’t believe in god, so this question to me is the same as me asking them “if you woke up on Christmas morning and there were gifts under the tree you didn’t put there, would you believe in Santa Clause? Has a tendency to end the discussion.

IF he existed, and everything was true, why would he owe you an apology?

I'd nail the bastard to a cross for eternity.

I don’t worry about that kind of stuff as it just impossible.

Does the pot of gold make you more likely to believe in Leprechauns? No, promises of rewards and punishments that are only delivered after we die are meaningless without a way to verify.

I would say "why such a dick"?

No, really, what's up with the platypus?

I would absolutely light him up. I lecture him the same way my grandfather lectured me as a child when I got out of pocket. When I was done with that (however long that would take since we have all eternity) I would begin his re-education by reading to him from "The Principles of Morals and Legislation" by Jeremy Benthem and "Nicomachean Ethics" by Aristotle.

I'd have to snicker I was a better god then you to my pets since I cared for them all with love and kindness, and discipline when necessary, but not with ignorance and destruction and leave it at that.

Playing along here, I like your demand, but I'd first want to know 'Whose God are you? What description that we have is the closest match? I mean, somebody's gotta be right about you, right?' And then, considering the issue of divine hiddenness, I'd want to know, 'Where the hell have you been all this time?' But one thing I would never do is bow my head or kneel.

Using my best SNL Chris Farley "Do you remember" impression, I'd say: Do you remember that time when you drowned everyone because you were mad........ That was awesome.

If God is real...
That means so is Jesus, and the unconditional love for those who do good acts.

Jesus knows the church has strayed from his message. He will welcome all who care for their siblings with open arms. Works are more important than Words.

I usually say, "it's unlikely but if he's there I'd tell him I'm not interested in joining him."

Where are my 72 virgins? Oh! My bad. I have to a martyr for that one. Okay let's try this one. Where is everyone? I would rather be in hell partying my friends than putting up with your bullshit lies and myths. Just saying!

No creo en Dios!

If god wanted people to believe it'd give us evidence.

I'd say "tell me about yourself!" Because all I've heard from the religious has been ridiculous.

I never had a very good answer to that question but I sure do now! Thank You!

What bands do u like i love music and make it i se u lovecmetal like me

I'd say he/she/it only has itself to blame for everything lol. I'd probably have a few more choice words too.

I kinda love this group of people.

Well ... I don't know that I'd have a basis to feel entitled to an apology, or that it would be prudent to demand one. But I have always said that whether in this life or the next, if there were any sort of creator-god that would finally present itself openly to me, the next question would be what the actual characteristics and character of that being was, what its demands / claims on me would be, and whether it was worthy of any sort of trust or cooperation. Those are all entirely separate questions. Theists tend to ask such "what if" questions, as if the existence of god is equivalent to settling the question of whether one should worship it.