My answer... works for many questions from religious people...

Me: "Depends, which god?"
Them: "There's only one god, the Christian one!"
Me: "Oh, you mean Yahweh?"
Them: "What?"
Me: "the god in the Old Testament is named Yahweh"
Them: "I meant Jesus!!"
Me: "Aren't they the same, father/son/spirit?"

You can see where this goes...

I'd kick the fucker in his hairy white balls.

I'd ask "Why did I have to die to meet you?"

I'd nail the bastard to a cross for eternity.

I would say "why such a dick"?

I would absolutely light him up. I lecture him the same way my grandfather lectured me as a child when I got out of pocket. When I was done with that (however long that would take since we have all eternity) I would begin his re-education by reading to him from "The Principles of Morals and Legislation" by Jeremy Benthem and "Nicomachean Ethics" by Aristotle.

I'd have to snicker I was a better god then you to my pets since I cared for them all with love and kindness, and discipline when necessary, but not with ignorance and destruction and leave it at that.

If God is real...
That means so is Jesus, and the unconditional love for those who do good acts.

Jesus knows the church has strayed from his message. He will welcome all who care for their siblings with open arms. Works are more important than Words.

I usually say, "it's unlikely but if he's there I'd tell him I'm not interested in joining him."

Where are my 72 virgins? Oh! My bad. I have to a martyr for that one. Okay let's try this one. Where is everyone? I would rather be in hell partying my friends than putting up with your bullshit lies and myths. Just saying!

No creo en Dios!

I never had a very good answer to that question but I sure do now! Thank You!

I'd say he/she/it only has itself to blame for everything lol. I'd probably have a few more choice words too.

Well ... I don't know that I'd have a basis to feel entitled to an apology, or that it would be prudent to demand one. But I have always said that whether in this life or the next, if there were any sort of creator-god that would finally present itself openly to me, the next question would be what the actual characteristics and character of that being was, what its demands / claims on me would be, and whether it was worthy of any sort of trust or cooperation. Those are all entirely separate questions. Theists tend to ask such "what if" questions, as if the existence of god is equivalent to settling the question of whether one should worship it.

"It's you! Wow! Let's have a beer!"

I know with every fiber of my being there is no God or gods. I do believe there are beings of higher knowledge in the universe that have been here in the past and may have hand in our advancement.

Amen to that, brother!

That's a really big what if with a really, really small chance of being realized. Really! ?