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For the women :

Has a man every asked you out on a date and when you said no, he reacted in a negative or nasty manner? Was there name calling? What names did he call you?

For the men :

I know all men don't do this, but I'd like your input on this topic... Did you ever call a women a nasty name because you felt rejected?

Cutiebeauty 9 Sep 18
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30 comments

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8

Oh yeah. "Fat" "ugly" "dumb bitch" and "slut" are just a few of the responses I've gotten from guys when I've turned them down.

Ain't it strange that a man calls you a slut when you don't sleep with him.. Seems like he's the dumb bitch lol

@Cutiebeauty IKR?

It's just a good thing you never when out with them.

@kenriley yep. Just reinforces the idea that turning them down was the right move.

@OpposingOpposum Yes it does.

Ahhh, Incels abound. Sorry you have had experience with those freaks!

7

I'm usually clueless when a man asks me for a date because they are usually friends and going for coffee or going to a club to me means hanging out as friends. But, usually I would be too busy anyway, and they think I rejected them when I didn't even know they were asking me out. They are usually good at not taking it too personally.

Total strangers who asked me out had been pretty good at taking rejection. I usually try to politely say no. But I've had men or groups of men wanting me to get into their vehicles while I walk down the street. I don't do THAT kind of dates.

6

Never. Not even in my head.

hi

4

no my grandma would have killed me my mum would have fed the remains to the pets and my sister scares the shit outta me

4

Never done it, because I get around being rejected by just never asking them out. I beat the system.

The relationships that I've been in have all begun because the woman showed interest, clear interest, first. I figure if she's interested she'll let me know. Is that wrong?

Really? Getting around the system? Love is not a system. . . Maybe she figured if you liked her, you would let her know.

@Cutiebeauty Maybe. All I know is this way, no one gets hurt, no one gets offended and I don't have to worry about whether she's really into me.

Like, I'm not hurting either way. Have a woman, don't have a woman, I'm gonna survive regardless. I don't think it's wrong to ask her to have to try if she wants to be in my life. We're both adults right?

Then again, I'm recently divorced so admittedly I probably know fuck all about love. I just want the next one to be the last one.

Far out. Great post. ?

4

Yup. It's pretty awesome!! But honestly, it says nothing about the person asked out and everything about the person asking.

4

Those are not men they are boys

No true Scotsman fallacy

@OpposingOpposum I've seen references to Scotsman theory, but I don't know what it is, can you explain plz?

@Cutiebeauty The no true scotsman fallacy is a way of reinterpreting evidence in order to prevent the refutation of one's position. Proposed counter-examples to a theory are dismissed as irrelevant solely because they are counter-examples, but purportedly because they are not what the theory is about.-Wikipedia.

@CutieBeauty @Simon1 @OpposingOpposum As explained by Anthony Flew in Thinking About Thinking (his 1975 follow-up to 1971's An Introduction to Western Philosophy): "Imagine Hamish McDonald, a Scotsman, sitting down with his Glasgow Morning Herald and seeing an article about how the "Brighton Sex Maniac Strikes Again". Hamish is shocked and declares that "No Scotsman would do such a thing." The next day he sits down to read his Glasgow Morning Herald again; and, this time, finds an article about an Aberdeen man whose brutal actions make the Brighton sex maniac seem almost gentlemanly. This fact shows that Hamish was wrong in his opinion, but is he going to admit this? Not likely. This time he says: "No true Scotsman would do such a thing."

@OpposingOpposum yet these morons act like little boys .....v

3

Their reaction to rejection is a revelation to their intentions. You have a right to say no and they have only a right to accept your answer. Any more words out of their mouth besides a polite exit is manipulative. “Can we still be friends?” “How about a coffee then?”

It’s a trap.

3

! Several times. They get angry, yell and call names, then claim they are the nice guys. One even stalked me.

hi

3

Hell no. I've always prided myself on being a gentleman, even in the face of rejection. And I know a thing or two about rejection, lol. Just because someone didn't have the same idea about a relationship as I did is no reason to fault them or take it out on them.

Hordo Level 6 Sep 18, 2018
3

We all have the right to accept or deny any and all advances. Self respect is required in dealing with that acceptance or denial!

3

There is no reason to get angry when rejected. Just move on...

3

If men are nasty to you on this forum, you can go to their profiles and block them. If a man becomes abusive or hostile to you in a bar, call the bouncer.
If he becomes abusive in the street, call the police, etc.

NEVER trivialize dangerous male behavior.. take steps to stay safe.

2

I have done this. I am ashamed of it. I have soul searched and found my answer inside a bottle of cymbalta.

hi

You had the decency to be ashamed of what you did and to do something about it. Well done.

2

And from a mans point of view....yes I have been harassed many times from woman who were really niceish but when you tell them that you want to not meet again you are subject to a lot of abuse about how bad you are whether you have slept with them or not....

A man receiving verbal abuse because he dumped a woman after sleeping with her is not in any way comparable to a woman getting verbal abuse (or worse) for declining a man's request for a date. Two entirely different sets of circumstances.

2

Never done it, though i have been called quite a few names by a lass who was annoyed that i didn't want to date her.

2

No I don't call women names if they turn me down for a date. I wanted to date this girl once and she said I would be the last one she would date, I said damn that hurt. The weird thing is she keep asking me after that to go places with her just to hang out. I always made some excuse not to go, but never feel like calling her some name.

She likes you... As a friend. Isn't that OK? Women need friends too.

@Cutiebeauty I think she did like me, but I wanted that date, and It kinda hurt, so I had to withdraw from her. But you are very right women need male friends, the same as men need women friends, and I can and do make a lot of women friends, and I wouldn't trade that friendship for anything.

@Cutiebeauty Though it is ok for men and women to be friends, you have to admit it's hard to keep a straight face when you hang out with a love interest that has no intention of ever dating you. It's not that we can't befriend women, but that rejection makes friendship a lot harder to maintain, even if both parties wanted desperately to stay friends. Depends on the people and how close they are.

@kenriley that's good to hear. Sometimes I feel like men only want me for sex and that bothers me, but I do have a couple of male friends irl and also here. But it seems like some friends here have kicked me to the curb since I'm now dating someone. Makes me feel sad...

@Cutiebeauty Friends don't kick friends to the curve. I think I have upset a few friends here, But as far as I'm concerned they are still my friends, and I don't give them up that easy.

@kenriley good to hear

2

No, never have. Might be a NY thing. Swearing is very common 'round there. And Jersey as well.

I can assure you it occurs everywhere.

2

No never did that, not too good about asking, but it spares you the rejection.

2

no, I just feel rejected. I do try and read people so it hardly happens says me living alone but you can't make someone fancy you.

2

NO! Now I just move on.

1

I have been physically assaulted for declining an invitation. That was scary!

Deb57 Level 8 Nov 22, 2018
1

I have never experienced being reacted on in a negative manner as I disclose every single time (if he's clueless) that I'm transgender. Honesty is the best policy.

1

Yes it’s really hard to let someone know that you are not interested in them , I have been called all sorts of wonderful names, ya fucken lesbian, seems to be a favourite but generally speaking most guys are quite mature about it. The older they are, the nicer.

1

No, I’m too much of a gentleman to do something like that.

balou Level 8 Oct 26, 2018
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