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This site has become my diary lol. All the people that post on here taunting us the ones that complain about one thing or another...you are correct. Still...I think a lot. I think a lot ...alone. My thoughts and questions bang around in my head with no one to tell them to. No one to talk with. Writing them down...for someone to read...helps. It makes me feel like I'm not so alone, and if I get feedback....I can grow. Its no longer futile.

People tell me to calm down. People tell me to relax. People tell me to stop thinking so much. People tell me to see a counselor. People tell me to be alone. People tell me that once I a completely happy being alone then and only then am I ready to have a partner. I sit and try to think of one single time I've been happy completely alone. Maybe in college. But nothing definite. I was always looking. I try to think of one single time in my life I have been completely calm and relaxed...and my only recollection is after a half marathon or triathlon I always took a hot bath and spent the rest of the day in bed, muscles throbbing. Except I didn't. One time I did a half marathon, then toured LA on foot. Then went horseback riding, then danced at a wedding. Another time I ran a half, then went to a halloween party and danced all night. My whole life people have told me to slow down, to calm down, to stop thinking, to smile and to relax. But is it really wrong to be thinking? is it really wrong to be excited? Is it really wrong to be me? You know when Im relaxed? When Im with the right person. Not alone.

lauraleigh38 6 Oct 12
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13 comments

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0

Just be whomever you are comfortable being. Fuck everybody else. ?

0

Regardless of what you do or who you're with, I feel the most important thing is to appreciate who you are. So, you be you and find what works for you.

0

You dont..."to much" keep that shit up!!!

BkCAT Level 4 Oct 14, 2018
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Please,never "Settle",keep your convictions,honor,self worth,they say love will find us,someday.Volunteer,become a helper for others,see if a local Library needs assistance,maybe helping at a animal shelter,who knows,you may find Mr.right at those.......

0

Finding the "One",to make a functioning couple,to almost be able to mind read,and answer questions,for each other,is a daunting task.I have some friends on FB who met their wives via dating sites,it does work, but the scammers to real ratio is getting out of hand. Getting all the broken pieces to line up,and then "Gell" is what makes dating so hard,especially if one or both of the potential partner has children.

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You are the only you there has ever been or will be. How can that be wrong?

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I have to be alone for long periods of my day, or out in nature. I like people but enjoy doing things near and/or with them more than only by sitting around talking.

If your mind is racing, you could try taking CBD oil since it seems to calm the mind and can be bought in most health food stores.

Link: "A 2015 study concluded that CBD oil treats numerous forms of anxiety, including social anxiety disorder, panic disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, and post-traumatic stress disorder."

[medicalnewstoday.com]

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Hi Laura, I have never been alone. I cherish my alone time. You can always talk to me.

2

A lot of that is parroted BS.
The one in particular that gets me is this: "People tell me that once I am completely happy being alone then and only then am I ready to have a partner."

This whole "gotta be happy" as a prerequisite stuff is BS on face. How long do you have to wait?
What if you have to be half dead and not know much better to "be happy with yourself"? 50,60? 80??
THEN you're ready? ?

I can't help but wonder if that trope is a simplified version of "you have things you need to work on or your NEXT relationship will run the path of the last"... E.g. passive aggression, alcoholism etc Make SOME attempt to address those things, THEN READY.
For clarity's sake I'm directing none of this at you, just the saying.

People echo a lot of things without really bothering to delve into much. I've been guilty too, but try to work on it also.
What's wrong with not wanting to be lonely? To have someone to dive into? Phkn nothing.
Yeah some don't seem to be able to be 5 minutes without someone to fill a void. I know those people too. Tomorrow is promised to no one. I see a lot on here who are going to "bigger and better", holding out for perfect, spreading themselves thin until they're on their death bed without anyone but family to care.

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Don't ever stop thinking...it's what sets you apart from the masses...just remember when you find that "right person" that they appreciate your head.

lerlo Level 8 Oct 13, 2018
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Just be yourself, and if you can't find the "right person" then find someone who's acceptable and will listen and talk to you. I was very lonely after my divorce, but gradually found other people I could talk to. It took a while, but it helped. They are not that one right person, but they listen and they care. I hope things get better for you.

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I have often wondered what it would be like to not always be thinking, to be like so many of the people I see each day with a dull look in their eyes, like staring at a cow in a field, they tend to do about as much as a cow does each day as well. Keep think and doing until it all fades to black and if the cow people of the world don't like then that's up to them but it shouldn't ever be a reason to stop thinking and doing.

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To each their own life. Listen to your inner voice. The soft one, not the one saying kill. Lol. Honestly, best wishes.

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