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Why is it so damned important to post a profile pic on most all of social media, this site included. For starters, if your interested in dating, discriptive words about ones appearance should be adequate. In most cases people are harder on themselves anyway. If your an adult stop beating around the
bush! Use your words! If you deside to meet, it will all come out anyway. Or you could just lie about it and see how that works out.
I maybe wrong, but it appears that if you don’t supply a profile pic, your bio isn’t complete and then you can’t communicate with some members. Kinda like “if I don’t like the way you look, I won’t talk to you”.
It’s my business if I want to stay physically anonymous regardless the reason. Or I could just lie about it. Or upload a cartoon character etc etc.
Represent who you are! Or just lie and see how that works for you.

GbRu 4 Nov 14
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20 comments

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AND:::: There is no way to prove that the pictures posted are real.

I know mine is real. But that is because I know what I look like.

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It all depends upon your goal. I explain in my bio why I am using a disguise. But, I think my posts reveal the type of person I am. If my words elicit a request for me to remove the mask for a private showing, I might.

At least your honest about it.. lol

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If I am looking for someone to date I don't want to have to take their word about their looks. Because, like you say, some people underrate themselves on looks, but just as many or more people lie and overrate their looks. Either way, I want to know and make up my own mind before I approach them thru the site. I don't want to waste my time or theirs or hurt anyone's feelings by contacting them if I don't already have photos to give me some idea if their looks are such that I could ever be physically attracted to them. As far as photos being required for anything, the fact is that on a paid dating site where everyone knows there is so much lying going on in people's profiles, both men and women, at least most, want to see both a close up head shot and a full body shot among the photos or they will not bother messaging that person. Nobody is going to just take someone's word about their body type or whether their face looks attractive and or healthy.

I agree.

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Thanks for all the feedback. I fired this post off after trying to ask a question in a private message. I will continue to learn the in and outs of how this site works.

GbRu Level 4 Nov 14, 2018
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I struggled with the pic too. It is the one thing that shows who I am if someone from work or my kids school were to find me here. It's not a secret, but it could cause problems for me if the wrong person found some of the things I post here.

You don't have to post a photo, Its easy to earn enough points to communicate by participating in conversation. Or you could post a picture of something else or a symbol like some people. A descriptive bio is more important to me than a photo, and how somebody interacts in discussions here.

MsAl Level 8 Nov 14, 2018

@creative51 Yes but I am not necessarily worried. about the person that fi d me. I'm worried about the gossip getting ahold of it. I'm already kinda different and I don't want to be the one that alsos posts wierd sex stuff on that devil worship site. Or just have people giggling because someone saw me on a dating site in general. There aren't many women on here in my area and it would be easy for a curious lurker to come accross.

Also more importantly it means someone else on here can more easily find your real identity by following clues and confirm who it is.

I'm obviously not that worried about it because I did post a picture. It is a valid fear though that I share.

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We're a society of vanity and liars. Doubling downwith good and bad reasons people mostly don't care if profiles lack pictures. If people really want to be hunted for connections.

I know that I push that limit with my only clear face picture also being under a "posterized" filter.

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I've been down that route one time too many that I don't really care anymore. Whoever wants to talk they know and acknowledge I like to talk back. Here we are what we think and I quote Metallica..."Nothing else matters"

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You can maintain your anonymity all you like... from whom though? We all have aliases. I don’t expect a potential partner to adore me for only my sparkling personality?. Let’s be real, we’re all attracted to who we’re attracted to.. especially on a website where personality is somewhat difficult to project. You do you!

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I agree - it certainly is your business how you wish to be represented online. And in the perfect, non-urgent world, people might take the time to know you through your words. But as you may have already gathered, this is far from a perfect world, and it seems it's getting farther and farther away from any semblance of perfect.

Fact is, most folks have certain traits - both mental AND physical, that they are drawn to - for whatever reasons. And they want to see at least a representation of a person before they might seek more.

So of course you needn't post a photo - but know it will likely limit your responses.

And consider, of course, the source. 100W. (hehe)

@CallMeDave ...with photos .

@evergreen

@CallMeDave my kid. There are photos of me - what is your point ?

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Your grammar says a lot about what you're like also.

I thought about adding something about this. An appealing profile pic might help alleviate some of the damage done by the sub-par grammar in a disastrously defensive post.

@Deb57 I think it must be 'tother way 'round.
Anyone can have surgery.

That is a great advert approach: "Bad grammar? Get a face lift."

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Part of the concept of being attracted to another person is in whether or not we find looking at them appealing or not appealing. That's just biology. If a man wants me to be interested in him, I will eventually want to see what he looks like. If a man refuses to display a profile pic, then I figure there's a reason, and I will probably treat him the same way that I'd treat a guy in a singles bar wearing a ski mask: like a predator.

Deb57 Level 8 Nov 14, 2018

Do you often carry the can of mace in your hand in anticipation of suspiciously hooded characters?
What singles bars should I avoid?

@Jacar, a wide berth is usually effective enough. If not, that's what bouncers are for. And I can't think of anything that would be a bigger turn-off than finding out that the man chatting me up in a SINGLES BAR wasn't actually single.

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If you can't make the smallest of efforts to post a picture, write a bio, or fill out the detail questions about yourself.....why would anybody think you would make an effort in other aspects of your life? If you seriously want to meet someone, you need to put your best foot forward.

5

This post kinda makes me mad.

What planet do you live on? "discriptive (sic) words about ones appearance should be adequate" Get real. If you were selling a car or pretty much anything really, people will want a description AND a photo. Sight -- it's one of the senses we use to gather information and make decisions.

You want to meet women but you come here with no bio, no photo, and a weak argument why you shouldn't have to provide these very basic things.

I wish you luck.

Unless you're just trolling. In which case, this post was brilliant.

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It would piss me off a lot to meet someone for a date only to find out it was a different person or 20 years older than she claimed to be.

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Probably if you are looking to date you would need a photo as the lack of a profile pic implies you don’t want to be seen for whatever reason.

My pic is a camel because I am not looking to date and I have been a sales manager for a camel milk company and got to love the creatures.

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I want to be anonymous here but then I'm not looking to date either.

In my experience though when I was dating, pictures tend to be either 10 years old, or that one picture out of hundreds that gets exactly your good angle in the right light, or a professional portrait that's nicely airbrushed, etc. Not always, but often enough.

Still, when putting yourself forth for relationships, a picture at least gives you a ballpark what you're dealing with in the physical attraction department. Unlike some men I wasn't demanding a Madison Avenue model but I'm human and can't get past a woman with facial hair and one tooth either. Requiring a photo for dating purposes seems reasonable.

Then of course there's the "what are they hiding" factor.

It's all well and good to say looks are superficial but the reality is they matter to most people most of the time.

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good luck finding someone

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A picture is closer to the "truth." A person can say whatever they want about themselves, and with a picture there's no way of knowing if they're telling the truth or not. On dating sites I don't interact with people who have no profile picture. On social media, I don't give it much thought.

On Facebook I like to use images from the TV show Supernatural, since I'm don't really like my face all that much, and this way I'm "real" but not scary. And to be honest, when comments and posts show up on my news feed without a picture, they very often tend to be trolls, and I end up deleting the comments.

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Without a profile pic, my first thought would be , what is that person hiding or afraid of?

3

I don't trust anyone without a recent profile pic. Too many trolls and scammers out there.

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