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The non belivers I know seem to be more balanced mentally more tolorant of others opinions, show less anxiety when dealing with others, regardless of their points of view, is this a coping mechinism? or more of a general attitude to be tolerant of others no matter what they think. What do you think about when you ask yourself questions like this as they relate to you?

Easytraveler 4 Dec 27
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I enjoyed most everybody's take on the question I posed on using a self imposed coping mechinism versus an attitude of practicing tolerance to what others might think. Many comments stuck me as funny, though I would rather give a like, I consider this a positive feed back, as in I can see your point of view, unless I laugh out load then I mark it as funny. Me I have to balance my I don't give shit what belivers think, with my feelings about being sensitive to others needs. I don't have to worry about people giving me trouble, I was robbed genetically, come from a family of people who are big and naturally mean looking with a dangerous vibe, more often than not, I need to act friendly and considerate otherwise people get nervous being in the same room as me

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I can say that for the most part everyone that I’ve met and communicated with personally was pretty balanced and really judgmental.

But then I got on the internet and WTF!???
I didn’t realize that there were that many people who felt abused and controlled by religion so much that if you even bring up any matter of religion they jump to shut you down and on Facebook and here they’ll try to get you kicked off if they believe that you’re talking too much about it.

And then there’s the ones that it’s honestly about politics. Hell you even had one comment on this post about right wingers. I’m guessing that since most republicans and conservatives are Christian that they feel as though they’re obligated to be an atheist or agnostic.

Because real liberal would ever go to church lol shit sounds like Jeff sessions talking about people who smoke marijuana. ?

I don’t know maybe it’s because those that I know publicly are already in my circle that I don’t ever recall hearing such ignorance or broad stroking prejudice coming from any of them but this is the internet so I guess when you cast a bigger net then you can only expect to get things that are unwanted.

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Most unbelievers are not authoritarians, plus they have the huge advantage that they can substantiate their views and demonstrate that they are based on evidence and are rationally defensible. So they generally are much more sanguine about being questioned or debated, and have much less of a tendency to confuse their beliefs with their very identity. To be questioned, doubted, or critiqued, or debated, is not to be annihilated. They can handle it.

Theists, historically speaking, aren't accustomed to that. They're accustomed to lots of unearned respect and deference, to basically a free ride in the marketplace of ideas. It's literally blasphemous to them that people have the temerity to question their dogma, even criticize or mock it. And it fills them with impotent rage that they literally have nothing legitimate to counter that. Just deflection, goalpost-moving, gaslighting, and ad hominem attacks.

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So far as knowing who is mentally imbalanced, I have no credentials in that department. In my opinion though, a measure of mental imbalance can be a good thing.

There’s some slick-talking preachers around here who show no anxiety at all when dealing with others. Run of the mill church-goers are a mixed bag, but I seem to relate better with non-believers, so long as I keep quiet about my spiritualistic tendencies.

Nobody wants to be bullied by atheists or church types. It’s best IMO not to divide up into groups based on religious opinion, but to respect everyone as a dazzling expression of the universe.

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Looking at the celebrity atheists, or anti-theists, I don't think non-believers are more tolerant.

I think it has to do with how threatening you find the opposition. Some religions people believe we are trying to damn them to Hell, which has them spitting like wet cats.
Some atheists believe religion will crush our civilization into bronze-age barbarism, returning us to the "glorious" age when women were sold like cattle [msmagazine.com], slavery was legal and prayer is the doctors prescription for fatal conditions and so much more.
Good reasons to be passionately intolerant of something.

I don't care what people believe, at all. The consequences of their actions on the other hand, has me deeply concerned.

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Eh, people are people, it doesn't matter what their religious beliefs are. Some are intolerant, others are tolerant.

Orbit Level 7 Dec 27, 2018
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We are rational thinkers...that is the reason why. Nothing to do with a coping mechanism. “I think therefore I am” to quote Descartes....no self analysis required.

@Gwendolyn2018 I stand corrected....of course I can only speak for myself. No doubt there is no universal answer as we do not all think alike.....it is therefore a rather pointless question to ask, couched as it is in a collective manner.

@Gwendolyn2018 I don’t usually fall into the trap myself, it is also a pet hate of mine....my apologies !

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I think that is totally dependent on the person and where they are coming from. I know very religious people who are tolerant and others who are not and the same goes for the non believers that I know. I have also noticed others that claim to be open and tolerant, but once you get them talking, you find that is not the case...just my two cents...

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I know for me I an not a God Fearing person. Rje thought of gling to hell never occurs to me. Sp minus all that religious fear its easier for me to be tolerant of other people beliefs.

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I try to be pleasant with everyone regardless of religion/politics, but here among presumably kindred spirits, I feel a lot more free to say what's on my mind. I live in an area with a large Republican majority, but in personal contact, most people are pretty easy-going. I imagine it might be a bit different at a sports bar or campaign rally.

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No, it's a benefit of an open minded people and treating humanity as it should be treated. Some believers are more open minded than others, but they still let religion control there lives. I'm so glad I freed myself from religious bs over 10 months ago. When the questions pertain to me, I try to keep an open atheist mind. Every person needs to be treated with respect, no matter what there belief system.

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I think nonbelievers just live more in reality, and so don't feel as threatened when confronted by those who are different in culture appearance of beliefs.

For believers, their lives and beliefs are based on myths, which is pretty shaky ground. When you encounter others who think differently, it is threatening, because at somelevel they know their beliefs are not on soldi ground.

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Critical thinkers are likely better at problem-solving and thinking outside of the box, which translates into: seeing more than one option on the table. If you are in a good place mentally and/or physically, this is a big asset. However, I would be cautious making sweeping generalizations. Depression, anxiety, PTSD, etc., are major struggles for many people, and these can impede good problem-solving skills, inhibiting one's ability to clearly see all of the options and take the best path forward. Even situational depression can inhibit your ability to function at maximum capacity.

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It's the lack of a coping mechanism's necessity that allows one to be this way. If youre coping by means of religion you have a rather untenable position to balance on, and you're naturally overly defensive against anything that threatens to get near enough to topple your foundation of lies.

Most of us had to consciously let go of all the guilt and shame and false narratives thrust upon us and get past that. We discard or change our beliefs to fortify them based on new evidence. Theres no fear of being talked into thinking another way because it doesnt have to unearth our whole concept of cosmology to do so.

It's like how learning martial arts for self defense makes one carry themselves in a more relaxed fashion and be more apt to avoid a fight than start one. We feel more intrinsic security and rely on no one else for validation. A man in touch with his own sexuality will not be afraid of the sexuality of gay people or women. We've got our own shit moving in the right direction and zero fucks to give about anyone else's projected issues.

That said, I am completely and utterly intolerant of far right political views espousing racism, sexism and acting wholly defensively about ones own isolationist western chauvenism. The reason I call it out isnt to virtue signal or because I have any right or ability to change their mind though. It's for the benefit of anyone who is on the fence, because dissenting opinions are important for every 3rd party listening to that shit to be exposed to.

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That may be true of a higher percentage of us atheists, but certainly not of all atheists. You evidently have not encountered some of the right wing fruitcakes on this site that I have.

LOL, I was just thinking the same thing. Some of these CONservative atheists can be pretty awful!!

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Coping mechanism? No. Coping mechanisms are for situations in which you are being harmed.

I think if you've had huge mental shifts you get to a point where you no longer assume you are always right and you're more willing to allow others to explore their individual ideas regardless of whether you agree with them or not.

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