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The older I get the less my tolerance is for people that in any way attempt to criticize, abuse, use, manipulate, undervalue, or neglect me. This is via men in relationships, sex, or housemates, friendships, family members, coworkers, etc. Everyday I wake up and I think of all I have accomplished via my hardwork and effort and how much energy and purposeful planning I put into the things and the people that matter to me and how little I see others doing either in their own lives or in relation to me in their life. I don't mean to sound like a complete pompuos bitch here but honestly I think I am a pretty hard working bad ass individual with good morals and intentions and I deserve relationships with people who recognize and appreciate me for what I am as I would them. Im getting to the point to where I don't want to waste my time on people who do live life with the same sense of purpose. Pick and choose wisely!

Lauraleigh39 6 June 23

Enjoy being online again!

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The sooner you come to those conclusions, and act on them, the better off you're gonna be.

twill Level 7 June 27, 2019

Good for you. Glad to see you back.


Love and respect yourself first. If you do that, you will be able to avoid unnecessary drama. Manage your expectations of other people because you can't control them, but you can control the amount of interaction you have with them. Not everyone you meet should stay in your life. Once you figure out who they are and what they add or subtract it’s up to you to either allow them to stay or move on from them.


Yes, one has to love oneself first.


Indeed, I will remove anyone who creates unwarranted, unprovoked, mental or physical turmoil in my life. And that includes childhood friends. Life is short that's what makes it precious, and I'll be damned if I'm going to let somebody else ruin it and bring me down to their level.


The older I get, the less I value the opinions of anyone else, unfavorable or otherwise . . . . in the end, what others think of us has little bearing whatsoever on who we really are. Generally people tend to be very wrong about judging someone else's character, especially when they do not know them well, and often even when they do.
Only we ourselves know deep down where we came from and where we have been, what our deeds or misdeeds are . . . . I'll let myself be the judge of that long before giving weight to someone else's opinion.

THHA Level 7 June 24, 2019

I keep a framed print on my wall, by my computer, so i will see it often...
I will not beg you for your time or try to convince you to chose me, the world is too big and I have too much to offer.
It seems like you are there now.


Eventually you will find someone who appreciates you

lerlo Level 8 June 23, 2019

I completely agree with you. After getting out of a very toxic, emotionally abusive marriage, I am much more aware of attempts to manipulate me and much less tolerant of it.
I am awesome and don’t want to waste time or energy on anyone who doesn’t appreciate that.

Im just realizing that although Id prefer to be loving and supportive and understanding to all people there are different calibers of people out there and there are some im just better off are not anyone I need or want in my life goodbye. These people show who they are via their actions or lack thereof daily.


Yes you do it's just so damn hard to find especially where you are a lot of guys with little respect for women there in the south. Have traveled a bit over the country try smaller state in mideast with more educated population. You are a attractive woman professional and intelligent should have no problem finding someone who respects and appreciates you

bobwjr Level 10 June 23, 2019

Diligent determined energetic effort in our careers is not always appreciated and some around us are simply blood sucking lazy or worse thieves getting away with damaging our lives


I got no problems with that. you might cut the militancy down by about half, but I say that growing up as a man. It may be your experience that speaking aggressively like that gets you the most consistent and dependable results. I'm open enough about my views to allow debate and the possibility that I'm wrong. I'm even fair game for mine just not being the chosen side. You still have to be open enough for constructive criticism just to meet general social rules of friendliness. Or you lose out on viewpoints you may have not considered.

I love it when men call me millitant for speaking my mind with zero words relating to violence in any form. God forbid a woman feel something passionately...too aggressive. Thanks but no thanks.

@Lauraleigh39 and right there ... your limbic system kicked in and your PFC never engaged. It's not a sex issue - rude is rude. You invite conversation by making a thread then bite those who don't agree? Then why invite conversation at all? This isn't the prison cafeteria. You're not out here hanging signs and making proclamations.

@JeffMesser not rude, assertive. There is nothing wrong with a woman passionately defining what matters and what doesn't. Im sorry that you have a problem with it. Scroll on by is my suggestion for you.

@JeffMesser Like the biting reference when I asserted myself. What woudl you call your attempt to call me militant for expressing myself? Just curious.

I understand the need to have an openmind and accept criticism...but only to a point. The older Im getting the more and more Im realizing how much I don't need alot of peoples penny a thought advice or opinions in my life, at least not from just anyone. Much more valuable are someone's actions that display who they are and you can see this in their own daily habits and also in how much effort they put into others as well.

@Lauraleigh39 I would have made the same comment to a man. Your mirror neurons don't fire up when you write something like that? I guess it is sexist that I expect more empathy from a woman than from a man. Your aggression is preemptive and unnecessary for the forum used. Perhaps even counterproductive. I gave a caveat to my statement - you just chose to ignore it.

@Lauraleigh39 I have no problems with confident women. Been working with them in court and the legislature for years. I just don't dig preemptive attacks.


When men are strong and assertive, they are praised.

Strong, intelligent women are criticized and called "strident," "militant," "bitches," etc.

@LiterateHiker exactly.

@JeffMesser Yes its sexist to assume that since you asked. Also you have not seen aggression from me trust me so please stop using the word in an attempt to paint me dirty. Finally you do not dictate what i post about so again I suggest just keep scrolling.

@Lauraleigh39 You go!

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