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I suppose that after 14 years of being off and on dating sites and receiving many inappropriate messages, I should not let them annoy me. However, that is more easily said than done.

I am primarily on this site for community and do not expect to meet anyone local who interests me enough to date--even then, I do not truly want to "date," but to have an occasional lunch or dinner.

So far, all of the men who have contacted me (none local) have been polite--until this week.

After I posted a totally flippant reply on a thread about demons invading women while they sleep, a man contacted me saying that because I like "a succabus" [sic], maybe we should get together. He wanted to know if I travel.

Mind you, everyone else who responded to my post understood the flippant nature and that I was ridiculing the woman in the video.

While this might seem innocuous, the message was blatantly assuming that I would be open and willing to travel to a town in Missouri and play "succubus" for this guy.

Some men have no clue how to approach women. Some men think that women on dating sites, even this one, are desperate and would fall into the arms of 70+ year old ugly man who cannot spell AND she would travel to do so.

It ain't me, babe, and it ain't most other women, either.

Gwendolyn2018 9 Oct 4
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9 comments

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0

you like a succubus? WTF does that even mean? did he misspeak and was trying to neg you instead vy saying you look like a succubus? 😕

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You have to realize there is a theory out there espoused by certain men that directness is the best way to achieve a goal. In the world of sales it is taught that the law of averages says that the more “no’s” you get, the closer you are to a “yes”. In sales classes I attended this idea was carried over to the pickup world. That manifests itself in the idea that if you go up to enough women and ask them if they would like to give you a blow job, though you may get your face smacked or yelled at 95% of the time, at some point you will meet up with one of the 5% who will say yes. That, according to the theory makes it worth the effort. Seems your fellow falls into that mindset, and with online dating, the fear of physical violence makes it much less painful to test the theory. And easier, since you can broadcast your slime over a much wider audience.
Sadly, for the same reason telemarking and phone scams work, this approach at some point probably does too. I know some pretty creepy dudes that have a lot more success in the dating pool than me, that’s for sure.

@Gwendolyn2018 it’s unlikely those who follow this line of thinking read past the first three words if it doesn’t look like a positive response. From posts on here, they obviously already didn’t read the profile, just looked at the picture. 😁

3

And the guys who don't act like that get ignored trust me on that as many guys here can testify to

not true... many genuine decent guys do not get ignored... do not confuse and conflate douhcebagness with confidence now.

1

Sounds like this guy is desperate for a succubus, and his desperation has made him frantic and irrational.

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Wait, if they can spell is it ok? 🤭

lerlo Level 8 Oct 4, 2019
1

No matter what they say...

... Men always let the little head do the thinking for the big head...

Oh, and, "men" includes me too, though I try not to think at all to avoid this ever present man trap

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You could say sure, and since they aren't real, neither is your appearance that never occurs. Anyway, sorry you experienced one of my jerk male comrades. We do have many, just less here.

Any male should ask themselves how would I respond if my daughter told me something like that happened. I know some evangelicals would blame their own kids, but many males would be upset.

10

No kidding.

From a 66 year-old man in Kirkland, WA, April 2016

Let’s us masturbate, Kate
How about that 90% match?! Natch.
Oral suits us well. Swell!
Mike, Kirkland

My Reply

Mike, that was a disgusting, creepy lewd message. Ugh. Don’t talk about sex in your first message to a woman.

That was too crude, Dude
You turned me off, Toff
Don’t lead with sex, Tex
You made me sick.

I have more class, Jackass
Don’t like lewd men, Ken
Keep it to yourself, Elf
You made me sick.

Kathleen, not Kate and not interested

p.s. Your main photo looks like you just sucked on a lemon. You look mean. You need to smile in your photos. Show your pearly whites.

@Bierbasstard, @Gwendolyn2018, @Barnie2years, @LizBeth, @Robert_2001, @BitFlipper, @ChurchLess, @moosepucky

My profile starts with:

There must be fifty ways to meet your lover.

Hike a new trail, Dale
Climb a new hill, Bill
I’m full of joy, Roy
Come trekkin’ with me.

I’m lookin’ for smiles, Miles
Intellectually smart, Art
Love a man with wit, Mitt
Come set yourself free.

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