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When I was a young boy growing up in southern Ohio my parents did not attend church. There were times where we, my sister and I, would spend a weekend or an extended period over the summer with my paternal grandparents. I loved them very much. Nice, simple, country people. But they were Southern Baptist which meant church on Sunday morning and evening and on Wednesday if I was there. Oh how I dreaded going to that small, hell and brimstone country church or the revival tent if it was in town.
But the big country home, many acres of land and woods to roam, the great country cooking, and the love my grandparents showed us is priceless. I remember that part, but nothing the preacher yelled about.

Sierra4 8 Oct 16
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18 comments

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1

My grandfather was Southern Baptist turned Jehovah Witness but he never went to meetings. I lived with my grandparents in my early formative years but have no memories of church of any kind. My aunt and uncle along with my cousins went to the JW hall weekly but country living and good food are the most of my memories from those days.

Church and religion came later once my mom and stepfather came into the picture. By age 13 it was a very big thing.

3

Ha! I was raised in Ohio and Southern Baptist, as well. Hence...I am here now!

Bethi Level 4 Oct 16, 2019
2

I never minded going to my grandparents' church or my aunt's. They had beautiful stained glass windows. Our church at home looked like a gym.
I also liked the singing. My mother sang like an angel so when the hymns started, folks would turn around to see where that voice came from. I loved that.
We were catholic, though. So masses were just droning Latin and half-hearted sermons. It took about an hour.
The only downside was that my sisters and I had to wear dresses, gloves and veils. Yeah, I'm old enough that there was still a rule that women had to cover their hair in church when I was a kid.

0

Sounds like a movie 😊

0

Nice story! Grandparents of the era!

0

Good for you remembering the good and letting the rest go!

1

My extended family will never know my depth of gratitude and admiration for their not attending or sending me to a church. Middle of the road politically, respected by their communities, educated for their time, moral beyond reproach ...they make me proud.

Varn Level 8 Oct 16, 2019
3

Oh yeah. Fucking tent revivals with crying and gnashing of teeth. I saw a couple as a teen - not my parents doing. My parents didn't go to church and as a kid I went to a Methodist one with my sisters. I always asked the hard questions; I believe they were just as happy when I stopped coming.
As an adult, I asked my Mother once why, she having been one as a kid, didn't raise us as Southern Baptist. She said, with her still apparent drawl, "I never wanted to inflict that upon you (us kids)."

0

Been there.

1

I wish that I had been able to spend more time with extended family.

3

My grandmother on my mothers side was very religious but she never ever made me go to church, although she went. I remember her as the kindest person in my otherwise chaotic early life from birth until she died when I was seven. Those years she was my sanctuary.
My other grandmother was just like the devil incarnated, jealous and two faced.

3

Your childhood experience sounds similar to mine. My parents were not religious, but I spent a lot of time in the company of my maternal grandparents in the tiny town where they lived. My paternal grandfather lived in the same tiny town. When with my maternal grandparents, I attended their non-denominational fire-and-brimstone fundamentalist Christian church (similar to Baptists but with less water) and with my paternal grandfather, his one-room wooden church in the country, built by his father who had fought in the Union army. Just as much fire and brimstone to be had there. I also attended 7 years' worth of vacation Bible school at the in-town church. The experience ended up being both detrimental and beneficial to me. Detrimentally, I believe the spare-no-graphics Old Testament stories probably traumatized my little pre-school mind to some degree. But, beneficially, by the time I hit my teens I had a more thorough knowledge of the Bible than most religious adults, and that knowledge is useful as all hell when arguing with believers, now, or even just being able to instantly note why they are wrong. I can turn their own tables on them. Debating is not a thing I do, but it feels good to know I could easily win one. Meanwhile my childhood was a pretty rosy and healthy one, and I basked and thrived in the unconditional love in my family.

Deb57 Level 8 Oct 16, 2019

I was raised in the church as a youth. I was forced to go to summer bible school and all that. I know my mom meant well but I was miserable in that setting. When I became old enough to say no I don't want to go I stopped going at around 14. I gave church another try as an adult when I was 21 and felt preesured to get married by the congregation even though I wasnt ready. I gave Christianity one last try after my mom passed. The church mother said its what she wanted. It just didnt work. I just couldnt force myself to believe something I didnt. After taking a course on religion and researching other religious beliefs I became a non-believer. I concur that having a deep religious background helps when debating belivers. You're so right. The average believer doesn't know much about their own religion...

@AlfonseCapone I get what you mean. There are times when I have wished I was a believer, since it would make for an easier life where I live: being embraced by community and having my pick of the single men in my age group. But you can't make yourself believe what you know isn't true, so here we are! HUGS!

1

I know that every time someone yells at me, I change my mind 😉

Yeah the revival stuff is meant to reignite a fire in people, one which burns out a day or two later, in my experience. This brings up a question though: Is the holy spirit the source of their passion? If so, what does it say that their passion has died? Doesn't that prove that there's nothing there? If a person's passion for christ dies as quickly as their passion for yoga or quilting, perhaps their religion is just another hobby, as opposed to to a true belief?

0

Speaks volumes doesn’t it!

2

my parents werent churchgoers either - but they stuffed me on that southern baptist joy bus in Odessa every sunday morning to get rid of me. that place was just hate, hell, fire and brimstone.

Free child care...

3

Hold onto the memories! We have a way of sifting the gold from the dross!

Had to look up dross. Never heard it before. See still learning new words. 🙂

@Sierra4 Ha, ha....it’s one we use a lot here in the U.K.

I had to look it up too, haha! I always say "Wheat from the chaff" because of my biblical upbringing.

@AlwaysBeQuesti Never had that problem...though we did use ‘wheat from the chaff “here too. I just decided gold and dross seemed more apt regarding the good and bad memories.

4

I remember visiting my Nanna in Country Victoria, Australia. The pastor was whipping the congregation into a fury, going on about devils walking the streets of Sydney; he was on about the gay Mardi Gras. I lost a fair bit of respect for their church over that, but it was my Nanna’s community.
I went to the Sydney Mardi Gras a few years later, and it was great and much more loving and inclusive than Nanna’s so called Christian church 🙁

2

All my life i have felt that it is the land we exist in and the people we interact with that have the most influence on us, more than any indoctrination of church or school. But that may only be true for me. I am glad you had a good childhood.

I had a great childhood. I thought all kids were having great childhoods. It was not until adulthood that I found out that was not always the case.

@Sierra4 Me too. I sometimes feel over-privileged when others had a crap time growing up.

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