I can see myself having that kind of lifestyle. People get used to 'habits' and too much of a change can cause 'issues.' Of course such a relationship would have to not involve long distance (doable by car).

However, with my last relationship she was gone some 2-3 months a year. We sort of had the best of both worlds except she traveled a lot and didn't have a set place to live. Couples can and should give each other a lot of leeway to live their own lives and maybe even have a split household with his/hers (or any other combination). People can usually make anything work they want to if both can agree on the importance of such an arrangement.

As I have said I do not need another. Totally independent (people often tell me I would make a good wife (a sexist comment). Needing and wanting are two different things.

Great article. It's not just the relationship part of life. I moved into this 55 and older complex for low income 5 years ago. Not the ideal situation but what has struck me most is the number of people who do not understand what independent living means. It's like any other apartment complex but with older low income people, management is not here to wipe your butt.
The men here are not keepers, basically looking to be taken care of. I need an eye roll emoji.
I think I stated in my bio, I want a relationship that is a two way street, sure at this stage we all have limitations we did not have in our 40's but women who were the care givers are done with that and realize being alone with yourself can be far better than alone with someone.

I can identify with this because it’s how I feel ...although I do wonder if I met the right man that I may want to remarry, not so far though!

Sounds selfish to me

I'm not sure what the problem is. I refused to marry my late husband for the first three years we were together. I just remembered what it was! The prior men in my life had changed (not for the better) after marriage or as soon as marriage was agreed on. I did not want to do that again. My late husband never did that. Having had a long, happy, marriage doesn't really make me want to do it again though. Still skittish I guess.

Older men realize how useful women are

It is interesting. I’m not giving up on a live-with mate. Living Apart Together (LAT) relationships don’t satisfy me, but not because I need a caregiver. Rather because I thrive on intimacy, and not just sexual.

I find this a bit funny. It wasn't so long ago that the stereotypical man was characterized as being reluctant/afraid to commit. This sounds like something similar in women.

"Live close, visit often" - Katharine Hepburn

Well, this sure a cheery thing to read before bed

Yeah not surprising

Through online dating, I met 16 middle-aged men who never learned to cook. They want a mommy to take care of them and great sex. This is not the 1950s. Cooking is a basic life skill.

"I'll be a great sous chef," they all bragged Yeah, right. Instead they sat on their butts while I slaved in the kitchen, waiting for food to be set down in front of them. When I asked them to chop vegetables, they had no knife skills.

"How do you cut a lemon?" one man asked. I had asked him for lemon wedges.

It's a huge burden to do all of the meal planning, grocery shopping, food prep, cooking and cleanup. At 66, I am happy living alone.

My married female hiking partners are sick of their husbands. Strong, athletic women, they still do all of the cooking, cleaning and emotional caregiving.

"Don't get married," they tell me. This from married women.

This doesn't surprise me at all. I don't want at this time to be a caregiver or have one in my life. I don't plan to marry again and I would be fine with having separate residences with an arrangement of sharing time at each one. Sounds like many of these people have thought it thru and come up with good plans. The challenge is finding ways to deal with eventual aging and illness while maintaining the relationship.

Being independent is what it is all about!