I live in a religious area, Alabama. Today I went hiking with a nice group in the Sipsey Wilderness. I hike alone near my house, but the Sipsey trails aren't always well-marked, so I'm glad I found a group to go with. As is typical for this area, they are all religious, but it doesn't bother me -- I'm used to it.
However, one of the men wants to meet me for a hike. Idk if I will go, not bc he is religious but because when he finds out I do abortions, he will likely freak out and tell the others, at which point I won't have a hiking group anymore.
I'm used to dealing with religion, but I only got trained to do abortions in November. I didn't think about how it might affect dating, lol.
If you were dating someone who did abortions, when would you need to know about it? Before the first date? During? Later/ doesn't matter?
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33 comments (26 - 33)
Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.I wouldn't mind dating someone who does abortions, I am pro-choice. But a religious person with a pro-choice is bound to be a match for the worst...
Merseyman1
Level 9
Jan 4, 2020
1
Frankly I am kind of proud to know you here online, to go forward to help with womens needs in the climate we are in right now (In Bama), well dear that takes courage.
Tell them your a doc, and nuff said.
Don't want to see you on the news, ok?
Davesnothere
Level 7
Jan 6, 2020
0
If asked what you do for a living state you are a Dr if asked what kind then say Ob/gyn. If he specifically asks if you perform abortions I would answer based on the laws where you are. If it is illegal simply say abortions here are illegal. This would only become an issue if you became more than hiking buddies. Wait until you know more about him and his opinions. As a vegatarian I would have a tough time dating someone who kills animals for a living, but a complete deal breaker for me is smoking so things can vary.
Budgie
Level 8
Jan 5, 2020
0
@Leontion As I am pretty upfront about being a vegetarian (not really something you can not talk about) the topic of why I am a vegetarian comes up early on, generally there is a lively discussion about my reason why. Yes I am against animal testing but would rather discuss the issue than rant at someone about it. I accept that people have different views to mine and depending on how they behave towards my views depends on how I react towards them. Would I feel deceived? I generally go into the situation assuming people I meet are meat eaters and those in medical professions have killed animals.
If you are a paediatrician then I would not worry about the abortion side of things if a discussion comes up around abortion then state your own views ie I believe woman have the right to chose and that safe abortions are better than backyard ones. You really have to judge how the person is going to react based on how they are entering into the conversation. I have meet people who on discovering I was a vegetarian (it was a buffet and I was only taking the salads) They asked me why I was a vegetarian and I told them they then jumped down my throat all defensive about how if we did not kill animals then there would be too many and they would starve (false but I was not about to debate them) I asked them why they felt so guilty they had to defend their choices when I had made no comment on them. They got even more defensive and told me to shut up. I avoided them after that there is sometimes no reasoning with some people.
I am the only vegetarian in my group of friends/family, they know I won't make meat based dishes for them when they come over. If I go to their place I do not expect them to make a separate dish just for me (I eat the salads/vegetables).
Really this is going to come down to how reasonable the group is how militant they are. You are not deceiving them/him by not stating everything that you do in your work. Do you supply contraceptive pills /advice to teenage girls? Would you feel the need to tell him that?
Good luck with negotiating this mine field.
Tell him you eat kittens. Then he will be focused on that and forget about abortions.
PondartIncbendog
Level 8
Jan 11, 2020
0
For me It would not matter at anytime. That being said I am not the indoctrinated, fundamentalist extremeist wacko I was when I was young. I wish you the best.
DavidLaDeau
Level 8
Jan 11, 2020
0
I would be interested to know if he is a gun owner or advocate and does he hunt? Then finding out his religious affiliation, views on capital punishment, his political party should give you a very clear indication of how much or exactly you would want to discuss.
Nevermind345
Level 7
Jan 6, 2020
0
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