Well we all KNOW the old saying, " A fool and his are soon parted."
Well the bit of rain, flashes of lightning and few gusts of wind have just inspired a newer version of that old saying, i,e.
A Faithfool and his new, approx. 42 foot high television antenna are also soon parted.
Not satisfied that his signal reception was not as great as he wanted to be able to receive the Gospel Channel of the Free to Air Channels in absolute perfection, Religiotard set about "constructing (????)" himself a television antenna mast.
Material used, light weight Aluminium tubing, wall thickness, at a quick estimate, approx. . 05 of mm , diameter approx. 3-4 mms if that, 3 lengths approx. metres in length, each section joined to the other by plastic tubing barrel union type fittings, no guy wires or ropes to secure it and a mismatch of u-bolts and shackle to attach it to a veranda post, plus a HUGE, most likely second-hand or salvaged from a scrap bin Television antenna fitted to the top most section.
Well rain starts, wind comes around in a few quick gusts,a sudden crashing sound is heard, I go out to check on the Budgie and my house and property and next thing I see is his antenna "structure" has done a Rhett Butler and gone with the wind, now laying across his front fence, about 1/3 of it hanging out in the traffic lane and the antenna resembling something like a cross between a mad woman's knitting and aluminium pretzel.
Wonder how great his reception of the Gospel Channel is now?
You need to write a book! βAdventures with Evangeloon!β
Do you reckon it might sell a few copies if I did?
Maybe you need to tell him it is a sign from above.
Either way, the Council has just left after cutting his antenna and the pole (??? ) in to pieces, loading it on to the truck and presenting him with a bill too boot.
Now, you are probably asking yourself, " How does he know that?"
Well it was Afternoon Coffee time and there is a nice fresh breeze blowing, so where a place to be sitting back, relaxing and enjoying your coffee than on your front veranda.
Just had the Faithfool of Fools yelled out me across the fence, not ONLY did his t.v. antenna abortion cost him a nice little figure of $1,347.80for the Council to remove the debris from the road but when it went crashing down, because he had zip-tied the cable from the antenna to the, yes, you can laugh, I did , power mains running from the power pole in the street to his house but it also tore the power lines from his meter box out as well.
The local crew from the Electric Suppliers have just left AFTER securing the torn power lines to his house as well a disconnecting them from the mains circuit supply system and as they were leaving they too handed him another bill.
I'm not certain how his solar cells system works because it does not have storage batteries, etc, so I'm guessing he will be enjoying some time in the darkness tonight and perhaps for a few days more as well.
@Triphid It's a sign that his god was protecting him when he zip tied to those power lines!
@anglophone No, more like, imo IF there ever was such a thing as god, checking out if he is dumb enough to be considered as a "True Believer" or not.
Imagine the amount Electro-magnetic Field interference he would have getting through the old fashioned figure of 8 cable that he was using instead of the shielded co-axial cable that mostly everyone else uses these days.
@Triphid His ignorance of electricity is quite "shocking"!
@anglophone Hey, NO joke here BUT about 3 years ago HE came and asked ME " How to change the battery in his vehicle" because the other one had gone flat overnight because he had left the cabin light on after searching for his wallet and finding it in his pocket anyway.
Many are the simple and easy household tasks that he has sought help/advice from neighbours about, tasks that my 8 year old nephew, Henry, has been doing now for at least 3 years.
@Triphid Could the word "simpleton" apply to him?
@anglophone Imo, Far, far too over-complimentary and way too much of an over-statement as well.
@anglophone Only where the power line to the house was attached to a bracket to hold it clear of making any contact with the structure, etc.
In 2004 Cocoa Beach Florida a church steeple snapped off and into the roof.[baptiststandard.com]
100 MPH/160KPH winds
Jeez Louise the winds were nowhere that strong when his Tower of Babble-on (T.V. antenna to pick up his beloved Christian TV shows btw ) its "swan-dive."
Shit, they'd be hard pressed to blow away the odour of fart at present.
And his gawd doesn't appear to give a damn.
Maybe it is the Revenge of the Scam Pedlars because he has not given them enough money this week....LOL>
@Triphid How are you feeling?
@Lilac-JadeCanada Health-wise, have my days of ups and downs, humour and amusement wise, well it is free laughs aplenty and way better than anything ever to come out of Hollywood imo, comedy-wise, other things considered, to quote Ned Kelly, " Such is Life."
@Triphid Jokes are always good.
You paint a most glorious picture with your words.
He does, doesn't he. He has become my guilty pleasure and a welcome distraction.
Trust me, I wish mine was a lot less Evangeloonified.
It was great when we had the previous owners there, they may have been Christians but they kept it to themselves and treated everyone as friends, etc.
@Triphid Same here.