All you need to be polite and say "oh sorry, I was excommunicated last year". Not only will they go away, your house will be blacklisted as they can't be seen with such heathens!

All you need to be polite and say "oh sorry, I was excommunicated last year". Not only will they go away, your house will be blacklisted as they can't be seen with such heathens!

All you need to be polite and say "oh sorry, I was excommunicated last year". Not only will they go away, your house will be blacklisted as they can't be seen with such heathens!

I tell them I'm an atheist. When they ask why? I say that no gods were ever real.
That's usually enough to do it.

Back in the day, I was over a friend's when 2 JWs knocked on the door. He answered, and they introduced themselves. He invited them to tell him their whole spiel. I gave him this "wtf are you doing?" look, and he gave me the "don't worry, this will be good" look.
At the end, they offered him a watchtower, for a small donation. He gave them like a buck, and took it. At which point, he asked them "this is mine? I can keep this?" And they replied of course. He proceeded to reach into his pocket, pull out a bic lighter, and burn it in front of them.
They never came back. Lol

My most successful strategy involved answering the door shirtless brushing my teeth. There was about six inches of snow on the ground and I just stood there blocking the door brushing my teeth until the guy just left after a minute or two. He never came back.

Keep your front door locked. If you do not know who it is, do not open the door. If it's my mother, do not open the door. I keep a baseball bat right where the hinges are.

My mother is a JW and they have a 'No Call List' just ask them politely but firmly to be put on that list and they will no longer call on you. If they do then just mention to them that you have already politely asked them not to call on you and that you would appreciate if they would respect your wishes. Sometimes they check just to be sure that you really, really, really don't want them trying to save you before Christ and his Angels come back and slaughter all the non-JW's until the world runs ankle deep in the blood and guts of the 'worldly' people who did not heed their call. I know, it's seriously fucked up but what do you expect when dealing with religious crazies?

They stopped coming around my way after stopping by and being invited in to blaring black metal, not satanic (too gimmicky), but nature oriented lyrics. I was told that I was a heathen and I was going to hell.

Meh.

I just say I'm not interested, and close the door in their faces.

Ha, an old girlfriend of mine answered the door naked and invited them in.

I would always prove I know more about their religion than they do. Then convert them away from their fantasies, into reality. They don't come to my door anymore.

I wish I had this problem. The only proselytizers I've ever had to deal with ambushed me after a fishing trip, walking back to my car. We got to talking about the old testament. That worked for me; they really knew nothing about it, only carried the new. They couldn't address any of my questions, so eventually had to move on.

This remembers me of a time in my younger days. JW would come knocking on the door every saturday morning. If you have ever gone clubbing the night before early morning visitors are not on your top ten to do on a saturday.
One saturday i was so pissed off i look them straight in the eye and told them i worshiped the devil.
They never returned..

That wouldn't put them of.A swift kick in the genital region works a treat.

One time I had some religious nuts show up on my property. I said to them, "If you don't leave, I will call the cops on you." I never seen them sense.