Christianists wear hypocrisy like a badge of honor.

My wife had dementia for the last six years of her life, but I took my wedding vows seriously, honored the, and never thought of abandoning her or cheating on her, even tho she probably no longer even knew who I was, much less had any idea what I was doing away from her, during the last several months of her life. To me, the point is not whether she was aware of what was going on, or what I was doing away from my visits to her nursing home, but that I knew what I was doing, and that I would have to live with whatever decisions I made, regarding whether to seek comfort with another woman or not, etc.. I was not good with doing that, so I didn't, even tho, sure, it was lonely and very stressful. But that is what my friends were for, male and female, along with my therapist, and they all got me thru it. Did I begin looking to date fairly soon after she died? You bet I did, with no qualms or guilt, since I had begun anticipatory grieving almost two years before she actually died, because by then I had already lost the person she used to be, and I knew she would probably die within two years. As for other people, who do choose to seek comfort, as you say, after becoming a dementia spouse, and becoming medically separated from their partner, as I was, I make no judgement of them and their choices, as long as they are being honest with themselves and others about it. I have also seen at least several women on dating sites that were in this situation, as dementia spouses, and they were open in their profiles about their situation and what they were seeking. I chose not to message any of them with any interest in dating them, simply told them I understood their situation, and had been there myself.

Typical hypocrite asshole, but they come in all stripes, both religious and non religious.

NOMB

My problem wit this is the holier than thou thing.

Like @annewimsey500, I also don't have a problem with the spouse of a dementia patient seeking comfort with someone else. It's often a long, arduous, torturous disease for all involved that alienates the patient's loved ones, sometimes for years. I know someone whose husband was bedridden with it for almost 12 years.

I do, however, have a problem with the hypocrisy, but I find that to be synonymous with the hierarchy of all churches. Perhaps you are more disappointed in your friend?

Hey, do as I say, not as I do.

I just prayed that your friend dumps his ass!!

Whatta pos…..

Well, so much for honoring his wedding vows eh???

I remember when I was growing up, my parents punished us not by the wrongness of our deeds but by the embarrassment they experience if people found out. Religion is all about projecting a righteous image, not about actually living th teaching of whatever church it is.

The main problem is that churches stated ethics, for the most part, don't match up very well with actual human behavior. Thus, people will commit "sins" and they can used guilt shame and fear to manipulate and have power over their members.

Hypocrisy seems to be a common trait in the religious. Makes their lives sooooo much easier!