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Sapiosexuals versus people who attract lower intelligence mates. For you sapiosexuals out there, what might cause a person to date someone with a significantly lower IQ than them? You've heard the saying, birds of a feather, flock together. Do you think people are more likely to date someone with a similar IQ or it depends and what reason would someone date someone with a lower IQ?

Beach_slim 7 May 24
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Phermones

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I find intelligence very attractive, or more exactly, I find incurious people to be a turn-off.

I had an opportunity to date a woman once who was not the brightest light on the porch, and in some ways I wish I had done so, because she was exceedingly sweet and kind and I'm sure she would have been very low maintenance. Rather than a shared understanding of esoteric aspects of life we might have shared emotional connection and sexual intimacy unencumbered by a lot of complicated feelings and requirements. A mutual admiration society over each other's intellect can be somewhat overrated.

But ... at this point I'll never know and I would not be willing to test that theory even if the opportunity presented itself.

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Being good at pattern recognition, knowledge retention, and problem-solving (all things IQ reflects) doesn't inherently make someone mentally stimulating or a good mate.

If they know stuff I don't know (and I know stuff they don't) and are good at explaining (and listening) and like learning new stuff, then that makes them mentally stimulating.

If they have social intelligence--the ability to read people, emote appropriately and genuinely in response, can communicate well, aren't afraid to be nurturing and generous, etc., that makes them a good mate.

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How are you evaluating your mates IQs? IQ is only a part of intelligence, and intelligence is only part of what makes a person. People with very high IQs are not common so chances are that most of them are with people less intelligent than they are.

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I don't do an IQ test but I do find a great mind attractive but I also find a nice pair of jugs attractive.

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Sexual attraction, duh.

"Ghostbusters" and Chris Hemsworth's hilarious character as the dumb hunk receptionist "Kevin" comes to mind.

Reminds me of a joke running around the internet years ago. It's a resume where some guy is asking for a job as receptionist. He messes up the grammar, says he can't type or spell, but he says that "people seem to like me."

Included is a photo of this hunk in cut-off jean shorts and open surfing shirt.

The return answer says, "Don't worry about it-there's spell check. See you tomorrow!

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This question begs another question: How quickly do you think you can accurately judge another's intellectual capabilities?
"Did you know that Einstein couldn't tie his own shoe laces?" -Lou Reed
Those who regard themselves as very superior often lack basic common sense, and can't even find the gas cap on their car, much less jumper cables, should the need arises.
("I hire people to do that stuff." ). Of course you do. Einstein.

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I tend not to favor bigotry of any kind, and I consider the measuring of (and emphasis on) intelligence or IQ to be a particularly acute form of bigotry.

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Sometimes a person might have a lower IQ, but they are kind and have street smarts. I could see myself dating someone like that.

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I prefer to date someone similar to me, who can keep me intellectually stimulated (then the other parts follow). I can see how someone who is intelligent but insecure might seek someone with less intellectual leanings.

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Oh, that explains a lot to me about my love life. Thank you.

@Beach_slim Me having dated people who are way below my IQ and being disappointed, over and over again, he, he.

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I am clearly sapiosexual, but it is not my highest priority, kindness and honesty are well before intelligence.
A sapiosexual isn't necessarily intelligent themselves, I know some ladies of average intelligence who go weak at the knees for brains.

@Beach_slim Intelligence is of course only one thing that may be attractive, My ex wife is very significantly less intelligent than I am, yet she made a fuss of me, did lots of things to impress me, made me feel wanted at a time in my life when things had been pretty tough. If someone had a lot of common interests and values, I think a girl who surfs and loves animals would be attractive even if not as bright as I am. My son is quite intelligent, yet not many of his girlfriends are, he seems drawn to artistic/creative types. Not sure if I have answered your question, but hopefully explained my thoughts a bit better.

I'd classify myself this way... I like men who can tweak what's left of my grey matter.

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I just struggle when I have to explain every other word to someone or any literary references to them. If they return the favour with, "Did you watch?...". I instantly turn off.

nah, the worst is, "Who do you think will win this sport thing that is on tv?" or "Which team do you support?"
I usually reply, "Hang on, got to go, i think my mum is calling me!"

@Bierbasstard oh dear

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At this point in my life... over 5 years since I had an enthusiastic partner (and that was well before we started talking divorce, the marriage was dead long before it was decently buried....)...

Well, even if she were a Jerry Springer addict, and believed every story in the Weekly World News was the highest standards of journalism, and thought there was actual reality in "reality TV".....

If she were good looking, and had a good personality, and was attracted to me, and wanted to take me home and do unspeakable things with me...

Yeah, in that (highly unlikely) case, I'd probably date her. Until I couldn't take the conversation any more. But until then, I would indulge in the sheer physical side of things.

But my preference is for someone smart. Smarter than me, truth be told.

Right! I enjoy being around someone who challenges me to grow and learn. All that other stuff is nice, in the moment, but holding my attention requires someone with some brainpower.

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Sapiosexuals think they are superior to others, just shows their true selves ?

@Beach_slim
For fun ? For sex ? For companionship ? For a drinking buddy ? Can think of a lot more reasons if you want them ?

@Beach_slim
Could be either or ? Does it matter ?

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