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The most chilling four words in a relationship:

"We need to talk."

Palindromeman 7 May 31

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27 comments

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13

Best thing about being single, no one can mess up your day like that.

13

Sometimes, those words are a huge relief.

yep

12

I thought it was "I missed my period."

OMG, the stuff of nightmares, right there.

8

usually means you haven't been all along...

That's true!

7

I suggest you talk regularly. Then you won’t ever have this happen. Not saying you’ll never break up but it won’t come as a surprise.

Me and my soon to be ex wife talked all the time didn’t stop her from cheating on me then wanting a separation then falling for the man she cheated on me with and wanting a divorce

That was not my experience...

6

or " we can still be friends "

6

"Sorry! I have HIV," is more chilling than that.

Yeah, but that's only three words 🙂

@Palindromeman, I will change it to "Sorry! I have HIV."

@Ride_Captain "We need to talk. Sorry. I have HIV".

Terrifying.

@Ride_Captain Awwww, where are we going to bury Fluffy 🙂

5
5

Internal screaming

5

HA! Mostly it's men who get chilled by the thought of "talking"...or as wimmin call it... communicating

Xena Level 6 May 31, 2018

I find it's a precursor to something really bad...

That's because men don't usually have "talks" to break up..they typically just act distant, start an affair with someone else, or move out.

@birdingnut My point exactly!

5

yes in any kind of relationship

True

4

Nah. These two are far scarier: "I'm pregnant."

Copy that!

4

Equally bad is the response is "No you need to talk. I don't have to listen." Then the door slams, or the phone hangs up. Nothing gets said, again and again until the person wanting to say something finally gives up the desire to talk and ends it without the needed discussion.

Exactamundo. And that, right there, is the start of the death of a relationship.

4

Concur!

4

....or... "Let's try it once".

Well, that could go somewhere positive...

@Palindromeman "Could" being the operative word.

4

You're about to get dumped..

3

"I need my space"

3

Yeah but in the long run that person could be doing you a favor. By letting that person go you invite so many other opportunities and new people to experience in your life. The journey does end, it just takes a new path my friend🙂

Indeed. Or, alternatively, that significant other is just pissed off.

But, yeah, in my case I am on a different path to my previous one. It started with the words "it's over, isn't it". Which is what I said. And she agreed. Still working this different path out.

3

Not really...

2

Way back when, I read or heard that it was healthy for a relationship to leave 3 things unsaid each day. Far too frequently the ex would point out to me that something I told him could have been one of my three 😟 . In retrospect that was the worst advice ever. But not discussing issues we drifted apart, and though we tried counseling we were too far entrenched to right the wrong. Maybe let little things go like how the toilet paper is replaced. Hey, the tp is there, if it matters to you it takes 15 seconds to switch it around. The dishwasher is loaded, maybe not to my liking but it is loaded, so you run an extra load per week or so The big stuff needed to be addressed and it never got the attention it needed. So don't be afraid of having tough conversations. How much is that relationship worth to you?

Comms are important, most def.

I am referring to a previous relationship. Which is over and I have learned that lesson, the hard way.

2

I heard this only once when someone split up with me. I didn't care except for the fact of him chasing me relentlessly, and it growing into a relationship. Too much time wasted on this. Anyway never will happen again.

2

Nope it’s “I want to separate” or “I want a divorce”

Dfox Level 4 May 31, 2018

Actually, it's mustering up the courage to SAY those words.

I'll complete the sentence - "we need to talk. I want a divorce."

There is a certain sense of finality there...

1

If talk isn't pretty much a constant, automatic feature, without ever a need to be announced before it commences... I'm not gonna be in that relationship.

skado Level 8 June 1, 2018

I agree with you, totally, Skado.

@StilInterested
If it’s not about full and free communication, what’s it about, right?

@skado You sound like a very deep thinker, very philosophical, and do communicate it very well. You absolutely have to find a mate with that ability. And it is a good point for everyone. Got to be more than "She gets me" to communicate.

1

I've got a lawyer! Looking at the replies, it appears there are a whole lot more bad things you can hear in a relationship than there are good. ☺

Oh yeah. "I've got a lawyer." Although, strictly speaking, the "I've" is a contraction of "I have", so if you want to get technical that is five words 🙂 Still nothing good though....

1

We need to talk:

I've found your porn stash/Ashley Madison acct., etc. you're screwed
I've been having sex with my personal trainer
My mother is moving in this week
I need to whine
I'm pregnant
I've found Jesus as my Personal Savior
I really thought that I could change you
You really hurt my feelings 2 years ago
I think I'm a lesbian
We need to talk

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