I prefer the phrase 'physical chemistry' or I suppose 'physical attraction' works as well.

I also feel it important to note that there are people who identify as asexual, people with diminished sex drive due to a disorder (or its treatment) and I expect sexual compatibility is either a null-sum issue or is of very low priority.

How you are in bed is often a reflection of the person you are with.

If she doesn't like me wearing my Batman outfit in bed we're not compatible

If she doesn't like me wearing my Batman outfit in bed we're not compatible

After I was married for 27 years. You get busy and forget to make time. In my next chapter it is very important to have that chemistry and not loose it!!

I took it as are you on the same page sexually. Like are you into threesomes but your partner is not? That is something that needs to be discussed early in the relationship so no one is surprised years later when you find out that it never was an option.

I tend to agree. Those were my thoughts Exactly. It's kind of hard to imagine otherwise.

Personally, I think the question is fine the way it is because sexual compatibility comprises of everything from frequency to methods to lifestyle. It’s also kind of pointless to go into much detail when realistically we don’t even have any candidate nearby to date I think these are the kind of personal questions to ask after two people have gone out already and want to establish something more.

I look at it as part of my trifecta: physical compatibility. Not only sex, but also activity. Sex is important, but it’s not the only thing.

I concur

I suspect most relationships have some sort of compromise in this area, and for the ones that don't, most of THEM probably have severe deficits in other areas.

Also: our DNA has this strange bird-call, up from the cellular, to the amygdala pushing behavior modifiers into our brains. This stuff is hard-coded, and requires a lot of effort to be user-modified (you can work out, but you can't get taller).

Its not about the drive it's about one or both individuals compromising on their attraction level to their partner for the sake of actually maintaining a relationship, if sex is an important part of there life you simply shouldn't compromise in that area too much or things get stale and resentful real quick, but obviously.that isn't true for everyone but it's an observation I've made of others and of my own experiences, there has to be a certain level of attraction maintained as well as emotional dependancy, with those two parts in place, the individuals libido likely won't be an issue, the issue is whether you should have gotten together in the first place, so it really nullifies the whole term of sexual compatibility if you both share a real attraction for each other and are being honest with yourself and not just in it to avoid being lonely

I think you've thought it through about right.

Boy this topic is actually discussed in a mature clinical manner. I would thick the obvious answer is date someone religious. For the fact that they are gullible and like to get nailed.

Any question asked would be too broad to get at the issue. Sex drive is just one factor in sexual compatibility, so I think that asking about sexual compatibility overall is a better question than just asking about sex drive

Either there is fire or not....the next thing down the line is for how long.....if both have the same drive and the fire is rekindled in regular basis then that's just perfect....as perfect as it can be

I think it was perfect as it opened a dialogue that sparked thought and and an exchange of views. I love hearing all the differences and things in common we have in this group. I think everyone wants to be happy and experience love. I really appreciate your question- it was perfect as it started the conversation. Which created more connection and understanding about each other.

The perfect question would look something like the following, with the understanding and acceptance that confidentiality can't be guaranteed on the internet:

Being as specific as possible,

1. Are you interested in having casual sexual affairs? If no, move on to question #2. If yes, are your criteria for a satisfying long term, sexual partner different from your ideal casual sexual partners?

2. What would you expect sexually and sensually from the ideal, long-term sexual partner?

3. What would you be prepared to do to satisfy your partner's long-term sensual and/or sexual needs?

My view is that this isn't nor can it be sexual therapy. Secondly, i feel that important issues and questions with any partner, sexual, sensual, emotional, or logistical are best dealt with face to face, and on an ongoing basis.

Since change is the only constant in our universe, people will and do change so if you want to be in synch with a partner, you better to be prepared to accept that sexual compatibility, among other things, must be part of many such conversations.

I agree. The question "Is sexual compatibility important to you?" is pretty vague.~

We are all adults here. Maybe even getting the word intimacy listed somehow which is on another level of Physical Connection.

I think sexual compatibility works. It has a broad description made of of many factors so while it isn't specific it still is applicable. Unfortunately the only way to know whether you have that with someone is by doing it. I think it is a pretty critical component of a relationship. If that part works well alot of other problems are not very important, therefore, being easier to resolve or ignore completely.

For me it's critical to a good relationship

When two partners have similar drives it makes life very fulfilling and beautiful between two adults. I love that Dan and I are evenly matched.

I wonder how I stayed with someone for 20yrs without compatibility. Feel like I’ve wasted a large part of my life but then, I do have great kids from it I suppose.

Compatibility and drive can be two different topics completely. Drive doesn't have much to do with proclivities.Why not ask both?