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And thus I am a warrior princess emeritus. Never tolerated what women tolerate. Never was fearful of challenging the men. Some call it rage. Some call it troublemaking. I call it self preservation which unlike most conditioned women, I have no problem pursuing. I feel for my sisters who can not stiffen their spine through no fault of their own. Social construct mandates it. Submission is rewarded. Resistance is punished. I was raised to challenge any man & win. Mostly I have, but there are consequences on this side of the divide also. What really ensnares me in conflicted emotion is when women do not support each other. They will choose a man over sisterhood. I have experienced it here on this site & lament our lack of fidelity to our gender. We see each other as competitors for a man.


Any male interested in his partner receiving as much pleasure as himself, should always be aware of what his partner is feeling, especially if it is physical pain. I have always thought this was universally true with men, now I’m having doubts.


Excellent article.


Even if the men disagree, this is my reality for the most part.


This is a terrible article. One of the worst most biased most harmful most dishonest articles I've ever read about the subject.

This author has thrown everything against the wall hoping it sticks and has women here and elsewhere nodding their heads as if to say, yeah I heard a friend say that once so the rest just be true.

If you want to talk specifically why this is just plain bad give me an example from the article and I'll debate it with you.

The article sounds very anti male.

Guaranteed to get women nodding in agreement. Which is its point just like Oprah's was when she started her show. All men are insensitive thoughtless cruel pigs when you have an all female audience. It sells. It's also nonsense.

@Infoguy211 I respect your opinion so I want to know, how is this anti male?

@HippieChick58 I could very well have misread it, but I got the impression that the author thought that all men force sex on women. Or at least, most do. I know that there are many, many men that take what they want, or try to, without any regards to what the woman wants. But not all. And not me.

@Infoguy211 Thank you for that. That is not the gist of the article that I got, and apparently most of the other female readers. What we're seeing is intimacy can be painful. Women's pain does not get researched as much as male pain does. If/when intimacy is painful we need a partner who is willing to listen and take care. For men bad sex might be not getting your rocks off. For women bad sex is pain that lasts a long time. Sometimes women fake orgasm just so the male will finish and the pain will end. Did you read any of that in that article?

@HippieChick58 I did read the article, but I didn't get that interpretation of it. Thank you for enlightening me.


I've read this piece before. Very sobering and enlightening.


Very good article. Thanks for sharing.


Crazy Ex-Girlfriend | The Sexy Getting Ready Song:

The "rapper" section is especially sweet.....


I love this quote from the article..SO true.

"Have you looked at how women are 'supposed' to present themselves as sexually attractive? High heels? Trainers? Spanx? These are things designed to wrench bodies. Men can be appealing in comfy clothes. They walk in shoes that don't shorten their Achilles tendons. They don't need to get the hair ripped off their genitals or take needles to the face to be perceived as "conventionally" attractive. They can — just as women can — opt out of all this, but the baseline expectations are simply different, and it's ludicrous to pretend they aren't.

The old implied social bargain between women and men (which Andrew Sullivan calls "natural" ) is that one side will endure a great deal of discomfort and pain for the other's pleasure and delight."


Good article!

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