Agnostic.com

54 12

Presumed to be religious. Do people just make the assumption you're religious, as if there were no other option?

Sometimes I get asked "what church do you go to?" As if, I must go to one of them. But, when I was doing my coursework as a teacher, the Professor that came in and graded my student teaching told me...

"A lot of teaching jobs are being cut (true at the time). You may have to apply for private schools. Many are Christian, but I know you won't have any problem with that."

I was sort of dumbfounded by the comment. How do you know that? Oh, because you haven't seen me eat any babies? I seem like a nice person... well, I'm not a Christian-- or a religious person! I wanted to say... but seeing as this was the person grading me, I just didn't comment.

Are you presumed to be religious, too?

silvereyes 8 Jan 18
Share

Enjoy being online again!

Welcome to the community of good people who base their values on evidence and appreciate civil discourse - the social network you will enjoy.

Create your free account

54 comments

Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.

2

I think it's pretty common for some people to just assume (without ever realizing or even thinking about it) that everyone goes to church. It happens when people are never exposed to other ways of being.

Then you have those who feel (again, probably without much examination) that the only right way to be is to belong to their preferred in-group--so anyone who seems "right" (i.e. not a degenerate) must belong to said in-group.

I've seen this so much in good-hearted people that I don't really fault them for it. You don't know what you don't know.

Once you know and you still chose to save yourself some mental effort by relying on flawed heuristics instead of permitting everyone's humanity to enter your eyes, that's a sin.

5

This happens to me so much here in Texas. At first I don't tell people I'm an atheist I'll just sit and talk with them and we'll have a normal conversation like two normal people and then they get to like me for me. Next thing I know it's hey what church do you go to or hey would you like to go to church with me this Sunday? When I tell them I'm an atheist all of a sudden it's like how can you be an atheist? You seem so nice. As if atheist or the meanest group of people in the world. The other day I was at the laundromat talking to a woman and she found out I was an atheist so she had a million questions and I answered most of them but at the end she says I know that you would be a great Christian. I told her I was a Christian up until I was 25 years old and she said see I know that's God working through you. No matter how much I tried to convince her that I am an atheist and I will always be an atheist and I am happy being an atheist she was convinced that I had to believe in God and even started crying because she was afraid I was going to go to hell. She then told me she would go home and fast for 3 days for me. I asked her not to punish herself for me much less for herself. I've not seen her since.

Wow. That one has not just drunk the koolaid, she's hooked up to an IV of it.

@silvereyes There's plenty wrong with me. 😛

I can relate to a lot of this 😟 Makes me want to get the "HELL" out of Texas! There have been a number of times I've helped strangers and they said "bless you" or something about god being responsible for what I did. I find it extremely frustrating because I desperately want to let them know a life long agnostic helped them, we are good, not devil worshipers, and god had NOTHING to do with it. Just barely more than that I want to avoid any more focus on the subject. I know discussing it is pointless. I rarely find anyone who can understand, let alone change their mind, and I don't want to hear the same bullshit again.

I give my prospective on this in my comment on this post. I believe it is a misconception that has been "brain washed" into the minds of religious believers, NO ONE can do ANY GOOD without believing in God/god. This has its roots in the belief that all humans are shameful "broken" creatures and need to ask for forgiveness. Forgiveness for what? For being human and "created" this way. !?!?!?!?

0

Yes, definitely. However, I do find it mildly entertaining with the look on their face when told differently.

0

I am with SO. I assume it is a Texas thing. Not as prevalent here near Houston. I guess because there more than two religions (Catholic and Christian.)

4

Not so much a problem in the UK. it's only happened to me a few times. I even once stopped and changed a tyre for two stranded Nuns with a flat, sure they asked if I attended church, but were completely understanding when I explained my atheist position. Hopefully they had a pleasant experience with an atheist that day.

Dav87 Level 6 Jan 18, 2018
0

In our society, pretty much yes.

4

If you don't eat babies, how did you get on this site? Lol.

Yes, people presume I'm Christian because most people are. I don't correct them, but if they were to ask I tell them I'm not Christian. If they ask more, I tell them I don't believe in god. They never ask any more questions and I don't offer more. I didn't like preaching Christians, and I don't want to hear preaching atheists. This site is perfect. I can take it when I want and leave it when I want. No preaching.

Absolutely. Preaching from any position on the deity scale is abhorrent. No one likes a smug preachy better than thou atheist, that’s for sure.

0

Absolutely happens where I live. It’s just assumed you are a Christian here in the Bible Belt.

0

I don't carry myself as a religious person. Don't go cussing around either... I just don't fit that image so... despite no drugs, seldom drink, you won't find me in the shadow of a church. Maybe is the looks I give in the presence of a bible. I get bigger as a cat. Serious as a hound. My eyes fixed in a prey. They get the message I reckon.

0

My coteachwr was telling me the other day how she is reading the Bible through its entirety. She has no idea that I'm an atheist. She like most in Oklahoma has made a big assumption that I must be a Christian. I do keep it quiet at work. I am outspoken in other areas of my life. Sometimes I feel a bit like a coward by not being more open about my lack of faith.

3

I have never been asked: "what church do you go to?" People have asked me if I believed in god and when I told them that I did not believe in god, the foolish ones stepped forward as though it was some opportunity for conversion. They quickly retreated when hit on the head with a metaphorical pile driver.

5

Hell, yes! All the time. I get, "who are your people?", and "which church do you go to?", constantly. Watching their faces when I answer has turned into sport.

0

I think so... It's the safe way to be liked when you say your Catholic around my town...

4

What you describe is the essence of why I'm bothered by certain religions. Their broad assumptions that everyone around them believe as they do. Like how could there possibly be any other way of thinking besides theirs !? Gr-r-r

If I find myself in a similar situation, I make sure to speak up and correct their assumption. I do it kindly, without attacking - but I sure do it ! Sometimes minds need to be pried open !

0

People will mainly assume that because it's usually a cultural norm where you may live. I can see how annoying an assumption like that can be.

Those that know my family but not me intimately will naturally assume I'm catholic, see me at any religious function and they'll see why that isn't the case. Random people might assume that, but most around these parts are more savvy to ask what I believe and not what church/denomination is belong to. Those that interact with me often like co-workers and such will know quick enough my dislike of superstition so they clue in quick enough that I'm an atheist.

0

It's kind of like someone thinking I must be a Trump supporter because I'm a middle aged white male, or they think I'm a conservative for the same reason. I also must be a conservative that's racist and sexist because I'm not a metrosexual or less rugged. It happens all the time with a myriad of different topics. I try to soften the conversation because I don't want it to lead to conflict. Not that I can't handle myself, but because I don't want the aggravation. In public, I don't usually like to talk about religion or politics.

0

no im presumed to be a nutter I think or a druggy gangster or murderer lol

lol but a nutter. I mean I must be because I do my own thing, I'm not religious and am covered in tattoos right. how could I possibly be a friendly humorous, intelligent reasonably decent caring human who is pretty good at art and helps animals in need?

2

Also, on the other hand, some people presume you're an atheist if not religious or is agnostic. In the eyes of the infinite and eternal, possibilities of life are also infinite and eternal in theory. How do we know what we don't know for sure?

My beliefs baffle most people, and they claim either I wear a mask and fake or that I'm illogical and need serotonin. I don't fit any single, suffocating/ confining label or classification of groupings. It's the perception of being within a bubble and not being aware or urges to be aware of anything outside of that bubble. To not signify and classify is a higher order level of thought in my way of interpreting this life and awareness that some may not fathom.

Basically, if we are not wired to this matrix or the norm, then we must be crazy or something and need to be fixed. It's so difficult interacting with people and to find anyone to relate.

8

Wait, do you not eat babies in public?

Mmmm, tasty!

@LucifersPen

@resserts I had been called by a nun "lucifer's rib" and I couldn't be more than 10 at the time.

@GipsyOfNewSpain Haha, what was the context of that? I've never heard that before (though I've known my share of nasty nuns).

@resserts I was not part of adam and eve family tree and sad thing was instead of keeping my mouth shut I answered "In my house we call him Satan". That gave me 2 hours of detention and a twisted ear I think.

0

Yes, deeply religious people tend to assume that others they meet are religious. That is because being religious is so central as to how they define themselves that they find it hard to imagine that others do not see things in the same way.

0

I will let a religious person start to give me their spiel after so much time, I snap back and hang them with their own words. When jovi`s witness talk to me they walk away and avoid me. If someone dares to try to "save me" those people I just toy with.

0

People assume I'm Christian (or I should say, still Christian) all the time. Most of the assumptions people make about me are usually way off because I look like a white, conservative, Christian male. Of those, only the white part is true.

I've sometimes had people get mad at me when I take exception to them saying they'll pray for me or saying that God is watching over me. And some think I'm a weirdo because I don't say God bless you when they sneeze.

One of the reasons I came to this site was that I wanted to feel like I was around like-minded people. I appreciate having this place to be open.

0

I don't get out too much or when I do, a conversation with a stranger is rare.

@silvereyes You look far more approachable than me. 🙂

@silvereyes No way! It can't be! 😉

0

I understand wholeheartedly as an agnostic and so much more. Basically, no definite beliefs just able to see possibilities. So, even when expressing my beliefs people will assume that I'm Christian; like no. My beliefs and my being are beyond the confines of any one label in all all aspects of life really.

0

I don't notice it that much. But then I use words like "evolved," "evolution," "uncertainty," "praise be to Darwin," "for the love of Science," "Bad Girls is still Donna Summer's best album."

Write Comment
You can include a link to this post in your posts and comments by including the text q:16296
Agnostic does not evaluate or guarantee the accuracy of any content. Read full disclaimer.