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Being judged

When i came out as an atheist to everyone i knew, i didn't get judged based on my appearance because I have long hair and a beard and I dress like a metal head I am a big fan of metal music, and most of the children in my high school judged me by calling me a race traitor because I wasn't into rap/hip hop. I embraced all the stereotypes by smiling and saying thanks which annoyed them, i found it hilarious, i still get judged for it, what advice would you give me that might help?

By GodlessWahid6665
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Given your stated reaction, I think you are handling it quite well. Find the others that are unconventional and hang out with them. If you have a couple of friends, the others don’t matter. Just be you.


I think smiling and saying thanks is a great way to handle those moments. That's how I handle it and it disarms people; they often don't know how to react to that. People are going to judge you no matter what you is part of human nature. Just stay groovy and true to yourself. smile002.gif


You are are the right path. Don't sweat the small stuff, focus on the important things in your life and move forward.


I'm a middle aged, white, mother of 5, who loves hip hop.

I hear ya.

I hear ya sista. I'm a grandma that likes hip hop. ♥


"If a man does not keep pace with his companions? He is not out of step. He merely marches to the beat of a different drummer. Each man should march to the beat of his own drum"


I learned a long time ago to "pick my fights carefully". I just let people think whatever they want to regarding my faith - or lack thereof.....after all, its not like I'm on some kind of mission to convert anyone.

Lavergne Level 7 Sep 21, 2018

My advice - shut up and stop using the phrase "when I came out". You decided that everyone needed to know your faith or lack thereof but had you just shut your mouth - no one likely would have cared. It's not a major event - it's not like coming out about one's sexuality and it doesn't need to be broadcast. I've never had an issue because I don't talk about it - I don't wear my non-theism on my sleeve - it's the least important decision or transition that I've ever made.


People are always going to judge. People who are critical tend to be very critical of themselves, so they often feel they have to put others down to lift themselves up. You be you, appreciate who you are, and you'll find the people who like you for you.

bleurowz Level 8 Sep 2, 2018

Treat others well and stay true to yourself.

Umbral Level 8 Sep 2, 2018

You only have to go through high school once. And when you move on, the opportunities to meet and be around like minded people are limitless. Pick them, and don't look back.

Byrdsfan Level 8 Sep 2, 2018

Be yourself.

kenriley Level 8 Sep 2, 2018

You’re gonna be judged. Just don’t worry about it. Wgaf?


I've learned that judgmental people, generally speaking, aren't very happy with themselves, so they look for "flaws" in others to make themselves feel better about who they are. I avoid them as much as possible.


"To thine own self be true"


Be yourself and don’t heed other people. Real friends will know and love you just as you are. We are all unique and it is not for others to judge you and want you to conform to their ideals. These people don’t matter and are just like sheep, you are an original.


We are all judged for some reason. Work on not caring what others think. Be happy with yourself.

LeslieV2 Level 5 Sep 2, 2018

I was in the same boat. Nobody tells me what to do...what kind of music to enjoy, who to date, etc.
And I've learned to state that with as much arrogance as possible!

Galihad_Z Level 7 Sep 23, 2018

Sounds as if you are pretty strong - go for it


Live your life. We all judge. That is how we decide who to be friends with, who to marry, who to vote for. I have never met anyone in my life who doesn't judge.

Sticks48 Level 9 Sep 3, 2018

Ignore people and do what ever makes you happy .


Be true to yourself. I have spent my whole life being judged by my appearance, and a few people were surprised at who I really am.


You can't control what other folks do, unless they violate your space. if people insist on judging you, you can only control your own reaction to that. if strangers judge you, it should be easier to be philosophical about it. when someone you care about judges you, that can hurt, but then, on the other hand, with someone about whom you care, you can discuss the matter and try to explain yourself. it doesn't always work. sometimes you just have to live with being misunderstood. but race traitor, wow, people who say crap like that can be dangerous! be careful of your personal safety! geez, you have to like the same kind of music or risk being called a traitor?


genessa Level 8 Sep 2, 2018

Everyone in my school thought I was a lesbian since they never saw me with a guy. They didn't see (and I didn't care to correct them) that I dated men much older than me.

All I can say is to ignore the idiots and be yourself. Like you mentioned, you're still going to get judged by someone so you may as well ignore it.

kiramea Level 7 Sep 2, 2018

Whether you should conform or stay true to yourself depends on which is more important to you. 1) The respect of shallow strangers. 2) Your individuality.

I would go with 2. Haters come and go, I remain the same.

MLinoge Level 7 Sep 29, 2018

You sound prettty ok with yorself and up to the challenge set just enjoy yourself!

jacpod Level 8 Sep 26, 2018

keep finding it hilarious. find some people that can laugh with you. throw back a few and laugh together.

YOU DO YOU, fuck a hater.

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