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How do you respond when a loved one asks you to pray for them? This is an actual group text from my sister to me and my siblings asking us to pray for her husband.

Hi there, I want you all to know that Chris has been experiencing health issues with his lung and now possibly with his heart. Thursday he is having a procedure to find out more. Please pray for a positive outcome. I love you all.

Shelton 8 Sep 17
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56 comments

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0

i have to say, not in direct response to your question but in response to a response that for some reason has no reply button on it, that when i have a problem and i communicate it, i really hate when people say they're sure everything will be fine. how do they know? i mean, if it's obviously a case of my insecurity about something, sure, that's reassuring, but if it's a medical issue, or a financial issue, no, there is no reason to say it will all be fine, and yet people say it, meaning to be reassuring. even strangers will do this. i find it horrifying.

g

I hear you, but of course I don't know whether everything would be fine or not. It's a cultural thing, I guess. Where I come from, people almost never ask for a prayer to hear a realistic response. They just wanna communicate their concern and hear that you're in that situation with them. That's what I meant when I said not to take things at face value.

@Darius77 because i would find it the opposite of comforting, i cannot say "it's going to be all right" (except perhaps to a child). i do try to be comforting. i just can't be comforting with THAT assurance.

g

@genessa
That's how I feel about it, too. I just posted a comment the other day bashing the whole idea of praying after a natural disaster. But this isn't about me or you. If I knew about your background, I would never say anything like that to you. We're talking about people who believe praying works and are practically begging for you to say "everything is going to be all right".

@Darius77 i try to find a way to be comforting without lying to them 🙂)

g

8

"I'm sorry to hear that. Keep me updated." Then you don't have to lie. If you're close enough, I'd throw in a "let me know if there's anything I can do" as well.

Remi Level 7 Sep 17, 2018
7

Call her. Check in and let her know you hope it all goes well. No need to mention prayer.

6

Say something along the lines of "you're in my thoughts". That's what I do.

This response works very well also.

5

I would just say sure thing. It doesn't seem like this would be a situation where it is prudent or necessary or sensitive to make an issue of differing beliefs.

5

I just tell them I'm thinking about them and maybe send good wishes.

lerlo Level 8 Sep 17, 2018
5

I always say, "sending love and light."

4

It’s just a plea for support. We don’t have to get caught up in what we think someone means by it. I always say “ sending vibes” . Just so the person is aware of the support. I don’t have any conversation in my head that “ I don’t pray so I can’t support the request or I will support them but not like that.

4

I would say I'm thinking of them. Which is true. I don't pray.

3

I ignore the prayer part. It's not the time to make a stink. Say that you are sorry about the health issues. You hope for the best for them. They are in your thoughts.

3

For me, if faced with this, the reply would be 'He's in my thoughts'. It shows I care and it isn't confrontational in any way 🙂

3

I do not respond. They were not requesting a response.

3

I just went through this recently. I told the truth. I said, "I don't pray. But, I will
keep good thoughts for you, which is the exact same thing."
I'm not really sure how the other person felt about it, but they haven't asked
me to do it since.

I do not have to respect religious beliefs, but I can still respect the individual.
That is also a two-way street. If you want respect, you have to give it, too.
You can't expect anyone else to respect your (general) religious beliefs, if you
are unwilling to respect that others may not share them, or believe anything.

3

I usually say that I hope the doctors are amazing and are able to help.

3

I don't think one has to assert themselves at that point. As others have suggested, one can provide support in such a situation without betraying themselves: He is in my thoughts, I remain hopeful, wishing him only the best in care. I've experienced even being in a prayer circle. While I bowed my head, I was thinking about my "to do" list for the day. The religious or religion controls your mind only if you let them or it.

3

i have been asked for prayers, not by family but by friends. i always say "i don't pray, but i will be thinking about you, and i hope for the very best."

g

2

I respond with "He will be in my thoughts."

Deb57 Level 8 Sep 26, 2018

Sometimes, if the request was due to a medical procedure, I will follow up afterwards with my hope that all went well. That's the beauty of genuine concern as apposed to just responding with "Praying." I can prove they really have been in my thoughts.

2

I usually say "healing thoughts coming your way" and "good juju".

2

All of my best thoughts and wishes are headed your way.

2

I would just respond that "I'm thinking of you in this difficult time".

2

If someone's loved one is extremely ill or in a dire situation I am most likely to just nod my head or maybe even say "sure". That doesn't seem to be a good time for a productive discussion that includes a debate on God or religion. If someone is scared to death a loved one may perish the debate can wait.

OCJoe Level 6 Sep 17, 2018
2

Very sorry to hear that but I'm glad they are getting it treated and have loved ones like you to watch over them. If you need to talk or PM me!

2

‘I’ll do everything I can, but that won’t help.’ But fortunately, my family are Atheists.

Varn Level 8 Sep 17, 2018
2

Tag along, say yes to give them peace of mind and take the win knowing you don't have to do ?

2

I usually just say I'm sending them well wishes or healthy thoughts. I'm very open about being atheist though so I think pretty much everyone knows.

That's what I do...gets that thorn out of your butt for the most part and they take you out of the loop...of not...just delete it.

2

If they know you're an atheist, they may just be including you on the text to keep you in the loop. I don't generally respond to group texts unless I'm sure a response is required, and it this case, I would think, as some of the previous responses, a phone call might best address the person's concerns.

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