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What do you regret the most from your last relationship?

Chrissybudleaf 5 Jan 28
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39 comments

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0

Not paying attention to my cat...she hated him.

Animals have the best "sixth" sense. If they do not like someone it is very often for a good reason.

16

Staying too long. Waitying to see if things would get better or if a better time to leave would cone around. It never does

13

Not being smart enough and self aware enough to dump her ass.

10

starting it..lol

Marz Level 7 Jan 29, 2018
8

To steal a line from a web comic that I can't remember now. "When you're wearing rose colored glasses, red flags just look like...flags." we were together for 19 years. A good portion of that was great. The sex was great, we never fought about money. And now, only having my kids half the time is a drag. But actual regrets? I'm too aware of my own baggage to be comfortable blaming her for everything. I'm grateful to her for being a good mom. I don't have to worry about the kids when she has them. My apologies, this turned into a ramble instead of an answer. Here's to new beginnings.

8

Not putting on the brakes at the first red flag. So, basically, going through with the whole thing. Even though it was mostly a very positive, loving relationship...it was built on sand, and ended badly.

@Atheistman That's a really odd question to somebody's direct response to a question.

@BlueWave Whenever I see something off like that I go read their post history to get a sense of their attitudes, bearing, manners, etc. It's usually easy to get a sense that way of whether someone is trying to be deliberately provocative, or if they lack tact, or whatever the case may be. Sets me up for later interactions to have a good basis of understanding of where they're coming from--and if I'm later faced with a question of blocking and/or reporting, that much of my homework is already done. And, most importantly, I ALWAYS err on the side of not feeding trolls.

@stinkeye_a I also do that most of the time. I prefer not to feed the trolls and if I determine that somebody really does get off on being a dick, I just block them. Ignore is not enough for me sometimes. 🙂

6

The sheer amount of time wasted hoping he would return to the guy I thought he was when we met...i am a dope!

6

I stayed too long. I saw all the signs of him cheating, but I refused to believe it. I hope he's happy, but I'm still hurt and pissed. We just broke up on the 30th of December.

Hope you're being gentle with yourself. Betrayal is never an easy thing to deal with.

Just curious. Do you really hope he's happy?

My Seattle relationship ended with that betrayal. Hoping for their happiness is not something that is a thought to me, even today. I'm no longer angry and I don't think about them. But, I don't have a problem hoping that their relationship ends with the same betrayal.

I am attempting to be kind to myself.
And no, I don't want him to be happy with HER, but I do want happiness for him.

6

That I stayed in it for so long. I relocated to be with him and he kept me so busy with hauling his ass, his parents and his daughter around that I had no time to make friends.

I stayed with him because I had no one else. When I look back on the kind of person I became, I am angry with myself.

6

There was a point when the relationship was over, but I capitulated and it went on for another year...allowing my 'like for her' substitute my 'love for her'...

6

That my husband was Bipolar 1, and couldn't hold a job; also had a skin condition, so he smelled bad when we went to bed - he refused to shower before he went to bed. Chronic depression. A horrible lover. Separate bedrooms for 13 years (he got put on a sleep apnea thingy). Often suicidal. I could go on.

But we are friends now. He lives in a different state (with his mother).

6

Regrets? Maybe letting it go on as long as it did. It was 5+ years, but really it was over at about the 4 year mark.

d_day Level 7 Jan 29, 2018
5

Pride. Not being the first person to let bygones be bygones. Unfortunately, that personal shortcoming is as deeply rooted like a hundred year oak.

5

dwelling on it

4

Gave too much, pity, I want to give all to a relationship but it ended up being very one sided, her family had so many needs and problems, mine didn't so, all effort went one way.
And then I got screwed over beyond belief, I am general a smart guy, but not where women are concerned.

3

That I gave up so much of who I was to make it work. And that I did so for so long. And that I allowed myself to believe that I was not enough, that there was something wrong with me that he couldn't (or wouldn't) love me.

On the bright side, though? I don't regret leaving him. After 17 years together, there isn't a single thing about him that I miss. At first, I found that profoundly sad, but now that I've had some time and space away from it, I'm ecstatic that I get to be me again. The time is now. I'm doing my best to use it wisely. And I'm happy. It feels amazing to be able to say that again.

3

That he moved in with me (seemed right at the time). He should have kept his own place !

3

No regrets, she is my best friend now. When I am around we go on friends dates to movies, dance, dinner. We do phone. No regrets.

2

I don't have any regrets. I gave my all and did love her to the best of my abilities. It just wasnt to be. We still communicate and the friendship is solid, I am just not her day to day.

2

I regret not being supportive enough.

1

Getting into it in the first place

1

Staying with them for far too long, out of habit and convenience.

Beyky Level 3 Feb 5, 2018
1

Meeting her

1

Where should I start? Lol

It was great until it was bad. I'm sure none of the females will believe me, but it was mostly her fault lol

1

That I got into that relationship.

1

Not leaving sooner.

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