QUESTION Get Ready to Cringe: Jehovah’s Witnesses Are Warning People Not to Masturbate – Friendly Atheist
Just for the record... there are scientific studies which show that a complete lack of any kind of sexual outlets leads to neurotic behaviors.
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16 comments
Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.So marriage or prostate cancer? I'm not sure which I like the sound of least.
NicoleCadmium
Level 7
Feb 1, 2018
0
All you have to do is tell them that you found jesus and that he had been hiding behind the couch along.
commander42
Level 5
Jan 29, 2018
0
Ejaculating regularly supposedly is healthy for our prostates. And it feels good.
Will I ever reject my heathenly hedonistic ways? I sure hope not lol
Piece2YourPuzzle
Level 8
Jan 29, 2018
2
That's it. The next JW who knocks on my door gets to lend a hand!
Charley43
Level 5
Jan 29, 2018
2
As long as it doesn't get him or her too out of whack!
LOL
Don't forget they come in pairs. Could be interesting...
We are only allowed 150,000 orgasms and with strict dating protocols, we use 76% of our allotment by mid thirties.
EMC2
Level 8
Jan 29, 2018
2
LOL - women have a larger allotment.
EMC2:
@silverotter11 That , to me, proves god is a woman,
@EMC2 Please quote your orgasm source
EMC2:
@Mcflewster As I understand it, Jehovah only allow 150k into heaven, the number may not be accurate but the point is the same
Geez, 150,000 is like 5 orgasms a day for 80 years.
That would take some real dedication.
Not cringing in the slightest. Couldn't care less ...
evergreen
Level 8
Jan 29, 2018
2
If you consider that persons with no sexual outlets at all decelop neurotic behaviors, perhaps JWs not masturbating will be a good thing as their neurotic behaviors will decrease converts.
HeidiBC
Level 5
Jan 29, 2018
5
Oh I love this.
Lol me too! You’re welcome to steal it
@CeciRosane60
@HeidiBC going to post on FB, bet I wil be blocked by a bunch of people!
Lmao I’ve posted it numerous times, I consider it a victory if I get blocked because of it @CeciRosane60
It's so ridiculous as to their reasoning behind why we should not masturbate. Xtians even feel guilty about it. Most say they don't masturbate. We all know behind closed doors they do. Same with their rule of no sex before marriage. They tell you it's a sin. It's all about control.
Sarahroo29
Level 8
Jan 29, 2018
3
Sorry. I wanted to read the entire article but I have to go masturbate now.
Rudy1962
Level 9
Jan 29, 2018
5
LMAO
I got to get back to Pornhub. Does the article have any pictures of Stormy?
@commander42 lmao.
Go masturbate? Wait, you guys don't rub one out to agnostic.com?
@JeffMurray lol. I'm not telling
@Rudy1962 Hrmmmm, you sounded out of breath saying that. I need a shower now.
Hahaahhaahhaahhaahahahah, me too
Another wacky religion with wacky ideas. My sister (the only religious one left in our family of 7 kids - the rest are atheists) is one. One good thing about this group is they fight against prayer in public schools. It is not their prayer or bible that is being pushed so they are against it.
JackPedigo
Level 9
Jan 29, 2018
4
Jerking off lowers your testosterone, beta. find a sheila.
Gabriel
Level 4
Jan 29, 2018
0
And your "sheila's" don't?
@JackPedigo no, actually I was told she stopped because I was pretty damn satisfying 
Is shelia four legged or two?
Well... that is like their opinion, man.
GipsyOfNewSpain
Level 9
Jan 29, 2018
3
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