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I still miss a woman who rejected me more than fifty years ago because of her religion.

JanGarber 7 Feb 9
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19 comments

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I was rejected by a boy whom I loved because I was not of their class ( his grandmother's words) "Never forgot that. He went away to sea, then became a train engineer. We saw each other one more time. I was married, visiting my mother. Looking at him was painful, especially because my mother knew what was going on. These loves leave holes in your heart.

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Back before marriage I've had a few guys decide to stop dating me strictly because I wasn't part of their religion and wasn't about to join it just to stay in the relationship. I can't say I miss them but I do think about a few of them from time to time, mainly in that 'what if they were not so stuck in their religion" sort of way. I think I get more irritated that people can choose an unprovable, unseeable idea over a flesh and blood, clearly factual person right before them but I really don't miss them.

AmyLF Level 7 Feb 10, 2018
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Move on mate

1

We alll want what we can't have?

Sacha Level 7 Feb 9, 2018

I think that philosophy is very true!

1

must have been true love

0

50 years is a long time. Let it go.

0

But you may have liked her for reasons connected to her religion without knowing it. And I've thought about this myself...you have to be a Christian before you become a secular Christian, just as you would start out as a Jew before you became a secular Jew. The secular Jewish movement is strong, but secular Christianity(as well as secular Hindu or secular Islam) is a thing that is merely presumed not to exist. I bet there's still plenty of women out there who have abandoned Christianity, but not all of the values that made them desirable. It is difficult to turn one atheist, but in time they may seek you out. You just have to look in the right place. And to boot, your maturity probably gives you way more charm skills than me.

1

It is not a human I miss,but my pet dog Pedro who was euthenised two years ago because of cancer which had spread from his right leg upto his chest.He was 13 years old when he died,a Pitbull/Terrier cross and the most passive dog,loyal,friendly and good with young children.He let all children pat him and cuddle him,even though people at first were a bit nervous about him.

2

Ah the one that... Well we all need those for nights when we can`t sleep so we try some personal, horizontal exercise.

0

Long time to think about it?

3

I wonder how many on this site have a one that got away due to religious beliefs. Not the case for me but what is it about her that makes you still miss her? In my case, BTW, he is/was gay and alergic to women - LOL. We have remained friends but I still wonder what if he had not been totally gay. Bi might have worked, lol.

Curious, how does one react when they have a gender allergy? Do they break out in hives? Maybe it's like e would feel if we were with a religious fundamentalist, nausea.

0

Oh noooooooooo.......I'm sorry. Miss her as in pine for her, or miss her as in occasionally thinking "Damn, if only....."

2

Wow - that's a lot of energy over the years that might have been better placed ... but hey, your choice.

0

Sorry hun, heart break sucks.

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Do you miss any other women that you had relationships with after that one ended? It is ok to remember and I hope you find peace and contentment with yourself.

0

I did the same thing to love of my life . . . 😟

4

"The one who got away"? I am being an ass when I write this, I really am, but ....I feel the same way about a bass I had on the line back when I was a boy.

Was that a mis-spelling of bad ass?

LOL

its all loss

@btroje For me it wasn't loss; it was growth and experience that has served me well through the years. I had that fish landed and it wigged away because I wasn't paying attention. As the coaches say, I'd taken my eye off the ball.

@Treasurehunter hmmmm... Never had a bad ass on the hook...Wonder how that works?

4

I still think of women who I have had past involvements with but I do not miss them.

0

Her loss, your freedom.

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