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What did your children learn from you?

Yesterday I got a lapful of glitter, opening a Mother’s Day card from my daughter Claire, 29. Reminds me of when she was a girl.

I feel deeply touched by Claire’s heartwarming letter.

"You've taught me how to love unconditionally and forgive," Claire wrote. I feel thrilled.

I did that by forgiving Claire. Her dad's family hangs onto grudges like a dog with a bone. We are role models for our children.

Mom,

Oh, how I love you. Thank you for teaching me so many skills I’m now using as a wife and family members (her in-laws).

You’ve taught me to slow down, take care of my things and pay attention to detail.

You’ve taught me how to love unconditionally and forgive.

You’ve taught me to cook healthy meals. I use your recipes all the time! You’ve taught me to take care of my appearance and stay heathy and active.

Mom, I hope you know how stunning and gorgeous you are inside and out. Matt always says he knows I will always be fit since you are. I love and appreciate you beyond words.

You take such good care of us in every way. We can’t wait to see you soon; we hope your foot heals up well.

I can’t wait to build a hiking relationship with you, Mom. We love you so much!

Love, Claire, Matt and Cocoa

Photos:

  1. Claire, 21, and me at Christmas. Mad at both parents (we had a united front), Claire protested scooting closer to me for the photo. See her fake smile? Ha. 2012

  2. Claire, 27, was a volunteer model for a pop-up store owned by a friend.

  3. Claire, 29, and Matt's 34, wedding in Sept. 2018 at Lake Chelan.

LiterateHiker 9 May 18
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17 comments

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2

One on a mission to be what she wants to be, one marinating on what path he will take. What did they learn, my door is always open and what it's like to be loved. The last part goes both ways.

2

Ongoing.. 16 and 14.. Sometimes it's hard to know if they are learning anything at all.. Lol

The older is miles ahead in terms of the fundamentals of getting along in society.. all those positive attributes already mentioned. As a real and tangible skill,, Ben and I are starting to play guitar together. For sure he's learning from me.. as well as others.

2

IDK...still raising them! 2 boys 14 & 11

Teaching them a lot of what Mitch 07102 wrote:

-Work hard. It is one of the few things you control.
-Don't make excuses. Do what you say.
-Be honest. Be kind. It matters.
-All people have value.
-The most important decision you will make in your life is whether or not to have a partner. Choose wisely. If you realize you have made a mistake, cut your losses immediately.
.....and ..........Save Some Money! Live within your means!

I do know that at this point, if I talk they listen. This has been accomplished through communication and love, no violence, very little spanking. I think most important at this point is, they trust me.... to be honest, to protect, to have fun & educate (goes both ways) ....and to feed them!

twill Level 7 May 18, 2019

@twill

Good. My parents never spanked us four kids. We never spanked Claire. Time outs, grounding and losing privileges (especially her phone) worked.

@LiterateHiker I got hit a lot, it was wild, but at least not beaten like some kids.
Losing privileges?.....my 11 yr. old Sam got in a situation at school and spent Tuesday afternoon in principals office. He volunteered to hand over his XBox as punishment, I didn't even have to request it. LOL

1

My daughter learned the”happy chord” on the guitar from me.
I think she’s learned to appreciate my patience.
Unfortunately she’s learned my weird sense of humor🙂

2

Pull my finger

1

I wasn’t much of a lesson for my daughter, but I got a second chance with my grandkids. They both learned to work hard, keep clear of troublemakers, and to reach for the stars. One is on a full ride at MIT!

1

My kids learned how not to be

1

Nice letter and photos.

My daughters seem to have learned from me. I see it there sometimes. My oldest has kerosene lamps and various other stuff that she saw me have in the 70's and 80's. I can still do the survival things but don't have as much stuff around. I'm not afraid of the zombie apocalypse but I think myself and both of my daughters know that the zombies are here and they are after you every day. At work, on the phone, and sign up. They will even infiltrate your burner phone.

2

-Work hard. It is one of the few things you control.
-Don't make excuses. Do what you say.
-Be honest. Be kind. It matters.
-All people have value.
-The most important decision you will make in your life is whether or not to have a partner. Choose wisely. If you realize you have made a mistake, cut your losses immediately.

1

What a wonderful daughter! I'm so happy she put those sentiments in writing for you to read and reread. Her mother is a wise, loving woman.

@Lovemylife1

Thank you! Love my girl.

3

My daughter has been and still is a heroin user. Yet through it all she has never stolen from me or her family. I think that is something.

@Count_Viceroy

You have my sympathy. Take care of yourself.

In her early 20s, I was afraid Claire would die, drunk in the gutter, at night in downtown Seattle.

@LiterateHiker thanks. It's wonderful she got through that rough time. I know a few former addicts my age, who are doing well, so I continue to have hope

@Count_Viceroy

Don't give up.

2

Have 3 children. Sorry to say, if any have learned anything from me, they’re keeping it a secret 😁
Your photo’s and story are touching. Congratulations on such a fine daughter, and good luck with the hiking 👣

@billhoo

Thank you so much!

1

My children learned manners. Please, thank you etc. Taking responsibility for your choices

3

I taught my children to respect their elders no matter what, with the exception of people they know will/are causing them harm.

Not to judge others as everyone has a history.

Not to steal, lie, cheat.

Treat your children with kindness. Discipline them appropriate to the misbehavior. NEVER HIT YOUR CHILDREN AND PETS.

That you can tell me anything and I will still love you.

Don't ever be a RACIST, MYSOGINIST, HOMOPHOBIC and don't be a bully. Ever.

Don't ever be a RACIST, MYSOGINIST, HOMOPHOBIC and don't be a bully. Ever.

My kids have come along well with these issues. They are passing it on to their kids as well.

My children are also passing this onto their kids and grandkids. Isn't it wonderful?

4

You and you daughter look so adorable.

About me... I hope so, I think so. We had disagreements when she was 16. I gave her everything she asked for but I put my foot down to nudge her away from distractions. She did not talk to me for many days but now she tells me she is grateful. I regret hurting her but do not regret not allowing her.

Since, she was the youngest democrat delegate at 18 from Texas to Philadelphia in 2016, is an effective public speaker, just turned 20, studying in an Ivy League on a full ride, traveled to 10 countries on own in 3 years. I am working on clearing possible road blocks ahead of her.

I will always say she is good and learned from me. However, I am aware that the real validation of how she was raised and who she is will come from the world, not from me.

1

Tried but no kids. Nothing taught, nothing learned.

@Sgt_Spanky

Do you have any nieces or nephews? If so, surely they learned from you.

Do you want one? I am sure I have a spare 😉

@LiterateHiker I'm less like the sage source of adult wisdom and more like the fun uncle who rough houses with the kids til mommy tells me to stop getting them all wound up.

@Amisja I'm not sure. What's the going rate on used British kids these days?

@Sgt_Spanky Send us $5 sounds fair

1

You are both pretty 😊

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