it is not your wedding it is her wedding.

People remember stuff like this for decades and it can really make things bitter. I say go, principals are important but it is her day.

Sure, I'll go to a friend's wedding wherever they choose to have it. Just try to not be obvious when you roll your eyes at the religious mentions...

I think if you went it would be because you are celebrating the union of two people regardless of their or your own religious beliefs. In other words. I would go so they know that I also celebrate the union of two lovely people.

It is not hypocrisy for an atheist to enter any building. That is, after all, what it is. A building. You do not need to participate in their bullshit. Just be respectful, resist laughing, and wait till the services are over. Then exit the building, exhale, and once you're out of the parking lot, laugh your ass off. Simple, and you don't miss your daughter's wedding -- that's the important part.

To be fair, I only go to churches/chapels if there is a wedding or funeral too so... To be honest going to a church/chapel is no real big deal, if your "faith" in your beliefs is that strong it doesn't matter if it's a city hall, church, synagogue or even a beach, you will be there to support your daughter and that's the main thing. Speaking from someone whom lost a father at 18, any support at any kind of milestone is GREATLY more important than anything else. What I don't like is the in-laws weighing in. A guilt-trip won't help, it'll hinder. Gotta love "good" Christians, eh? You should go and prove that you don't need religion to be a good person, as Mrs Roosevelt said "No one can make you feel inferior without your permission." Are you going to let some people whom spend an hour a week speaking and demanding wishes from an imaginary friend make us look bad? Do what you want now, but when your daughter looks back at her life and sees you supporting her even against your own wishes/beliefs... Well, that can give her a right and royal boost

You are showing support to your friend not worshiping a god. I go to weddings and baptisms and funerals at churches and synagogues all the time to show respect and support to my friends and family.

I made the idiot mistake of " not turning up to the baptism " and paid a heavy price . folded like a pack of cards on the second grandkid. Neither of mine were annointed !

if it leads to a great party ....why not ??

you should , to share in here hapiness

if it were me and no one knew before hand except those who needed to...i would go. it's not as if i would have to wear a HI MY NAME IS: with ATHEIST underneath my name. you can still bow your head and stand up and be respectful. it's also not like they have a who isn't following along radar

Of course. You are there to honor the couple being married. Now when they get a divorce, you should also go the the church for that ceremony.

Why not? You don't attend "for the religion" but to share your friends' happiness.

A church is a building with a roof and possibly other comforts such as heating / air conditioning. What's not to like? Going into a church doesn't infer that you believe in the teachings in the Bible, just as going into a mosque doesn't infer that you believe in the teachings in the Koran.

thanks for your opinions/advice.. i'll have a chat with the pair of them and see what they actually want....i feel a vodka or 2 coming on

Look, I got my masters from a Catholic affiliated college (Go St. John Fisher!) because it was local and had the degree I wanted. (I was weary at first but seeing the LBGTQ safe zone signs across campus made me know it was ahead of the Church on social issues).

Unless it's a really regressive church I think it's really petty if you don't go. If you don't talk about the afterlife it might really surprise you how much some religious people align with your world views.

Your not being Silly. Maybe a little rigid ( in my humble opinion.) I didn't go into the chuch at my grandparents funerals - my choice. But I did go into religious buildings when I was in another country as a tourist. I like to think that I was respectful while i was there (as well as curious to see the imagery and mood of how others might worship).I would go to church for my daughters wedding - except she lives in a country where she isn't allowed to get married (Australia) (plus she wouldn't choose church) so its hypothetical.

This is your daughter's wedding. I take it her first. She needs her father there at her wedding, is what I say. Let the religious say or do whatever they want to.

Yes .I think you are being a bit silly. A church is only a building. Go and support your daughter at her wedding.

I have no problems attending weddings, funerals or other events in religious houses just spare me the sermon.

Of course and I have!

Especially if the one getting married is your daughter.

I felt this way many decades ago when my sister-in-law decided to get married in a church..But I went anyway..I thought it was petty of me to feel like I couldn't enter a building that tis after all just a building..If it is not 'imbued' with whatever mythical thing they claim then why not? If I was in Europe I wouldn't miss the Sagrada Familia, or Notre Dame, or any other church temple or place where there was art that I am longing to see..what is the difference? And believe me when I say that I despise all forms of organized religion...all of them. But that wouldn't stop me from going into the building where these 'rites' might be held. I think it used to be called 'cutting off your nose to spite your face" or something similar..You are talking about snubbing your daughter's wedding, not being a closet worshipper or something..

Yes! Your daughter is doing something that is going to change the rest of her life. Making a commitment to her boyfriend and in doing so both are making a commitment to the families of the other. It matters not that you think the religious nonsense is just that. What matters is that you are there to support your daughter in her decision. In that there will be no hypocracy. No one is saying that you have to pray or do the silly nonsense that I completely understand you do not want to do. It is more important that you show your daughter respect for her decision because as this is a decision that in reality is one that affects both families and she will know that you have done something for her that I assume she knows you don't exactly want to do. This will show her that you love her, care about her, and respect her decisions even when part of that decision is to do this in a church.

My hope is that you come to the decision that supports your daughter, in doing so you will bring everyone involved closer together. Deciding not to attend will most likely do the exact opposite and I don't think that is your intent in this matter.

I view them as architecture, and admire the craftsmen or women , beyond this l agree it is better to be there in respect of your daughter,s choice as she has respected you.

There is no reason to not partake in your friends love and celebration just because you know the building is dumb