I don't believe monogamy is natural human behavior. It's a societal construct, encouraged by religion, and the aspect of human nature to "own" everything.
People are going to do what (who) they're going to do. However, if you make a promise
to be faithful to one person, you'd damn well better keep your word.
If you know you can't, you shouldn't promise that you will.

what do you mean by 'less effective"?

I like poly because it gets rid of unnecessary conflicts. Like if you're in a monogamous relationship and you cheat, it's a betrayal of trust. Whereas if, from the start, everybody consents then no trust is betrayed because everyone knows what they're getting into.

Still think majority are brought up to be Monogamous, get married and have children. Multiple sex partners might be right for some but monogamy right for others.

Despite 1000's of years of mongamy being idealized, in today's society more than 70% ae nto mongamous. I do not think it is natural for humans to be monogamous, as that is nto how we behave.

Then again, I am not too keen on polyamy either. Tooofen polyamourous persons focus on the sex and not the individuals and partners are left enoti0onally wanting.

I think monogamy is a nice ideal to srive for as a way to try to get closer, but I think it woudl be an error to actully expect it.

I think the key to making a relationship last is honesty. If a monogamous partners has sex with antoher person, they shoudl be honest about it right away. If they lie and put off tellign their partner, then when their partner does fidn out, it will seem like a huge betrayal, while if a person is honest almsot immediately, then the smarter partners will at least know they are still loved.

Secrets in relationships and families creates dysfuncion. If you want to doom a relationship to failure, then keeping secrets will do it.

No, monagomy is unnatural but perhaps culturally necessary. Otherwise those commune of the past wold have continued past 20-30 years

Probably polygamy but I'm not that ambitious

Polygamy has the most benefits but most people would have to unlearn the stranglehold monogamy has on people.

If you wanna fuck around be single that's the way I see it

I think humans are naturally inclined to be serial monogamists.
People naturally get jealous and don’t want to share each other.
But people also naturally like new things and new relationships are exciting.

I'd personally prefer polygamy because it should eliminate the lying which seems to be inherent to most monogamy attempts. I've never been terribly upset about infidelity in and of itself. The lying is what kills the trust which ends the relaionship.

Interesting question. I don't think that monogamy is natural. However, I do think that monogamy is achievable and expected, even covetable to many people.

While I believe some people can make poly relationships work, I know it's not for me. I do think that relationships often run their course after several years.

An idea I've had for a while is that we are more biologically wired to have multiple partners to continue our species. A study was done in 2005 (Helen Fisher, Harvard) that measured the levels of dopamine released over during new relationships. The dopamine levels increased dramatically for a year or so, before declining (the Honeymoon phase). Just long enough to get to make semi/permanent bonds and/or get pregnant.

However, after that depends on who you are as a person. Your upbringing, your values, and your actual compatability with the other person when the chemistry is less in sync.

The issue here is "natural" so pre civilised. In that case we are not monogamous.
I bet you never realised how much into sex ecologists are.
The shape of the human penis, particularly the glans and coronal ridge evolved because we are so promiscous. (well the women are). hahaha. We are talking about the human species, long before we had speech and rules and such.

Polyamory is what I prefer.

But not polygamy. I don't want to be married to more than one person. Or at all.

I suppose this involves how you define monogamy. If divorce is prevalent in a society then can it be really characterized as a monogamous culture?

The ultimate goal for all species is survival, or procreation—the strongest drive of all organisms—the accomplishment of which was not likely possible early on under a system of monogamy. Later (much later), the establishment of a ‘pact’ or ‘contract’ was necessitated in order to ensure the continuation of the clan and the retention of resources (wealth) within a clan, most often under a system of primogeniture. This arrangement was later appropriated and ‘sanctified’ by religion, which had the audacity to claim that the entire system was an institution that had been ordained by God—bollocks!

Today we appear capable of being of two minds. We respect the bonds of trust, genuine affection, partnership and even being ‘soul mates’ that may be experienced in a monogamous relationship, while at the same time we recognize our history, as well as potential curiosity, of having multiple partners. However, at this point, I am unconvinced that polyamory is a net positive, and would hope that more of us might strive to deepen the relationship we have with our life partner.

Yes.

1. "Natural" is a fallacy. Arsenic is natural, doesn't mean you use it as foodstuff. As always context is everything.
2. Human sexuality has such a broad range of "normal" that the only questions which make sense in the context of modern, western, first world cultures is "Does it do any harm?" "Is it consensual?"

our biology shows us to be mostly monogamists.

I have no idea of the science involved but one at a time please.....as if it's a problem lol

I think it depends on the individual. Everyone has different desires and proclivities.

I have no desire to share a man with another woman or to have more than one husband. I have friends who are polyamorous and seem to be happy about it, and I am happy for them if this is what they prefer. Not for me.

Some creatures are more monogamous or poly than others. I don't see why this can't apply to people as well.

Well - as polygamy is understood in our culture it is all to the advantage to the male. Since you are a male how would you like to have her be with more than one husband? Somuch of polygamy is bound up wtih male domination.To me it is saying to a woman if you have say three wives each one is only a third of value to you. How would a male feel if he was just one third f of the equation?