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I live in a very conservative Christian southern state and if I happen to be going through a particularly hard time in my life the people I know always tend to spout platitudes and or bible verses at me expecting it to somehow make me feel better. Even people that know what my beliefs are. This often ends up irritating me to no end.

Is this something that anyone else experiences?

If so, how do you deal with it?

Darkmaze 4 June 6
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33 comments

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0

Time to invest in ear plugs.

12

I am in the Atlanta area and heard a lot of that crap after a loss. When someone said "everything happens according to God's plan," I usually responded with. "Well maybe God's an asshole." I never got anything other than rapid eye blinking.

9

My “thoughts and prayers are with you” . . . . Because I don’t have to spend any money or energy to offer them to ya! 🙏🏻😇

5

I’m in the South too. So this happens with regularity. It IS annoying.
My good friends don’t do these things: they know I see the world as chaos, without god/s....Love me and wish me well.
Those who DON’T know me well, or at all: I go with “Bless your heart, honey”....I can get worse, and I have. Positivity bullies should just run before spouting platitudes in my general direction!

As I told a chain drug store check out clerk who told me in a very loud, obnoxious voice, “ Have a bless-sed day”; I said in just as loud voice, “And may Siddartha Gotama bless you, as well!” All I got was the “deer caught in the headlights” look! 🤪 I loved it!

5

There are places in the country very different than Georgia...frankly, I don't know why people live in some of the places they do...
Take advantage of the diversity of our country...

5

I live in Oklahoma so I definitely understand.

Remember some of them do actually care, it is the only way they know to share it.

I have radar for detecting phony, if I feel they are phony, I avoid them like poison ivy. If I think they are sincere, I thank them. If I need practical advice, I specifically ask the sincere ones for recommendations.

4

Just ask them if you can have their car after the Rapture, seeing as how they won't be needing it.

TO_BY Level 7 June 7, 2020
4

Seek like minded within the community. The rarer, the better! Usually, they’re so starved for companionship - they’ll do about anything for you - and vice versa. I’ve often felt instant friendship on these rare occasions. One or two may be all you need to maintain your sanity, and theirs.

Meet them at Democratic meetings, Library gatherings, amid School faculty, Nature or Conservation groups.. I laugh so hard with a friend over ‘the usual suspects’ ...that we’re constantly watching to see they're not around. It may only take one 🙂

As for the platitudes… give as little in response as possible. Do not reward them. Starve them, or at least force them to become real.

Varn Level 8 June 6, 2020
4

I live in Texas. It’s the same. I’ve never needed anyone else’s support, so, I don’t ask. If you need someone to talk to, I’m available or anyone else on this site.

Thank you, I just joined this community and I really wish I had known about it before. Everyone so far has been great. It's crazy how finding some like minded people to talk with can uplift your day.

@Darkmaze It is indeed. If you need to talk, drop me a line.

4

yes, constantly. I dislike the way everyone demands that I conform, lie and buy into lies and mass delusions... The unscientific lies about the spread of the corona virus being contained by insufficient masks and a distance of 6' feet when the minimum according to science is 12' and they just arbitrarily cut it in half "cuz" 12' is "unreasonable". Alrighty then...go ahead and piss in that swimming pool why don't ya'...it is all part of the same human mechanism that allowed Hitler to rise from nowhere, dominate a nation, and build concentration camps for and carry out an extermination program against the Jews. Denial, desensitization, dehumanization, and delusion are all clustered together on the human thinking/behavioral continuum...The more you exercise one, the stronger they all become...the easier it is to turn your back on another human in need - like the little girl that lives on the corner and is blatently being beaten and abused, like the women sporting blackeyes that we politely accept ran into walls, like the crematorium half a mile away burning hundreds of bodies a day til all the air is suffused with smells of burning human flesh, and we keep politely carrying on.
This is how the human mind and our behaviors are shaped. The more a muscle is worked the stronger it becomes over time. The prominence of, and connections between ideas and thoughts become stronger based on frequency of activation.
ya' can't make me.

Amen, sister.

Not sure what your sources are, but no one is saying the virus is being contained by the masks. What they ARE saying is that they will reduce the amount of virus going into the air from the wearer. The coronavirus is about 0.125 micron in size, so not even the N95 mask (0.3 micron filter) can offer full protection. You would not be able to breathe very well in a mask that was able to offer more protection. The point is to reduce the amount of virus and every little bit helps. Any kind of mask will capture some of the larger aerosols that contain virus. Viral load is a factor in infections. A single virus particle will not cause you to have a coronavirus infection.

Same goes for distance. Twelve feet is better than six and six is better than three. If you really want to avoid the virus, stay home, live alone, and don't entertain guests. But not everyone can or wants to do that.

But anyway, what does your response have to do with the original question?

@itsmedammit, Much of my background and bias are stated in my profile. I answered the question as I saw fit as is my right. I addressed what I saw as the meat of this issue...the demand to conform to societal norms and participate in and uphold mass delusions. "Everything will be ok", "Tomorrow is another day" bs. Although I do have a background in neurochemistry, biology, and psychology, as well as food safety standards, I am not claiming ANY authoritative virology information at all. The corona virus garbage I stated above is what I have observed from media coverage of this crisis. I have witnessed doctors and other "experts" repeatedly pushing bits and pieces of information that, in the space of 5 minutes, they turn and completely contradict.
The comments concerning the 12 feet minimum distance were based on an interview with the infamous Dr Fauci. He stated that the minimum safe distance was 12', shrugged his shoulders as he AND the reporter exclaimed the 12' distance impossible to work with and maintain - laughingly saying not even a cars distance would be acceptable. Then watched as there was a complete turn around and he recommended the 6' measure instead...while I sat there saying "yo, where did ya' come up with the science that recommended 6' buddy? Give me one justification... anything..." and nada... Ya' wanna be get pissy about my facts - blame Fauci's inability to explain things combined with his arrogant belief that his words should be accepted on faith.
And, final word, I think you are completely wrong...people are going around all over the place claiming the promoted measures are keeping people safe and "preventing the spread of the corona virus".

@Alchemy And I stand by my understanding of virus transmission. I do not find the request to wear a mask oppressive.

3

If people care about you and that's the way they know to express it, why does it bother you? Accept the love they are offering, without accepting the underlying belief. Get over yourself.

...so did you catch, or respect this part “Even people that know what my beliefs are.”..? Get over it? Get lost ~

3

It won't help, I know, but I recall Mayor Daley's old quote: "'Together we must rise to ever higher and higher platitudes…"

3

Just smile and join in, cast your hands skyward and say "yes Lord, I see! I am inspired now! Thank you Jesus! Ezekiel 23:20 -- the Good Book! Oh Lord Ezekiel 23:20 . . . . . . and then let them go look it up.

Lmao

3

I've dealt with it by cutting myself off from people. I wouldn't advise it. Just try to be tolerant of the fools. I suppose they mean well 😟

3

The people I know already know better, they know I am a non believer because I never hid it from anyone who knows me, family and friends. If someone just says something because of their brainwashed reflexes, I just ignore it but make sure they see me rolling my eyes in a manner which they absolutely know it's how I react to stupidity.

3

I roll my bright eyes

twill Level 7 June 6, 2020
3

Nod politely

bobwjr Level 10 June 6, 2020
3

Welcome to the asylum. Enjoy your stay.

I'm here, too.
I generally don't associate with people who will do that.
If someone does do that, I ask them to keep that nonsense to themselves,
because it's not helping.
Depending upon who it is, and how they're trying to deliver their "message",
determines if I tell them to fuck off with their bullshit or not.
I don't care if people like me.

It's funny. As soon as folks who think they're better than I am, find out that I
don't give a shit about who they think they are, and I'm not afraid of them,
they tend to back off.

2

Consider yourself fortunate not to be brainwashed, and free to live your life fully. You have escaped the hate-filled bubble. Recognize how gracious you are to listen to their nonsense; you are truly giving, where if they are ever charitable, it is still selfishly based on the hope they won't go to hell.

Think of yourself as an alien, visiting a primitive planet, doing all you can to avoid detection by the zombies.

2

You could live Anywhere & that will still happen! People want to help & this is what they are told will help. Chill!

You seem to need some chilling… People who know damn well what you think and how you feel - yet persist in forcing their beliefs on you need a swift kick in the ass! Everywhere - not. But I wouldn’t recommend moving to Portland (OR), too many have.

@Varn gonna be a tough life if you think everyone else needs to be 100% exquisitely tuned to your inner dialogue 100% of the time, sweetie......

2

"Satan bless you." Mostly reserved for those who know where you stand. If they become offended, you can then say to them . . . . "Well, now you know my feelings after you say what you do to me."

2

I say, "Thank you," and move on to something else.

2

I usually just thank them and get on with my day. For those that do know me, I remind them that I'm probably going to hell in every religion (if you believe in that story of thing... lol), but thanks anyway.

2

It makes them feel better. Brownie points. That is my experience with it.. "see what we did god". That said some may feel genuine about the issue but lack what to say. We are an animal with lots of nuances.....maybe to many?

1

Your feelings are in your control. If you want to be miserable, that's a decision you make!

1

I live in Texas...and stragely I have never met anyone who quoted the bible to me, and the majority of my friends went to a christian private school, heavy on the christian.

And they know I'm a nonbeliever!

So Im the kind of guy that likes to deep dives into a topic...and if your religious. Watch out. I love to pick apart your religion with glee, bit not in a bad way. Example:

When I first met them I said I wanted to write a christian novel. (Hear me out: it's just like fantasy novel but with a decent sized market and if you are good you could make millions have a loyal following and piracy would fail because your readers are less likely to steal about christianity.)

Anyways, I've never read the bible and didnt want to, so I started asking them tons of questions related to the story I wanted to write. I can't remember the story idea, but it required deep knowledge on how heaven worked, how angels worked, what Jesus did etc, knowing rhe timeline, etc.

Any time anything christian related came up, i would ask a hundred questions about it. If things didnt make sense I'd ask them to explain it further. I think the act of explainging their religion kinda brought out some of the holes and flaws. I'd ask questions and accept them as the authority. And often time I watched them struggle with explaining something that sounded utterly nonsensical when you say it out loud. When I just accepted what they said and moved on, they eventually realized I was seriously only interested in their religion to write a fantasy novel and not in the least desirous to become christian. There was no debate, no argument. I accepted their word, and i think that was unstelling for them.

I soon forgot about the story (it required too much research) and oddly have never discussed religion with them since. Not sure if my writerly ambitions had anything to do with that.

Anyways, I say if you want them to stop giving you platitude, just go on a deep dive with them for an hour and accept it without getting the point. Soon You'll be left alone out of fear of getting inundated with questions, a real inquisition, lol.

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