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Some assistance please. One of my dating sites has questions. Two questions involve do you have a television in your bedroom and do you eat in bed. Can someone please explain the mortal sin of having a television in your bedroom and/or eating in bed. Thanks.

lerlo 8 Aug 3
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42 comments (26 - 42)

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Not everyone viewing your profile would be happy with those habits. It helps people to better assess a potential match. Doesn't mean there's anything wrong with liking those things.

And "mortal sin?" ... uh, I don't think so.

You should read some of the comments--people have pretty strong feelings. Not sure having a TV in the bedroom is a habit. Contrary to some beliefs it is possible to pay attention to your partner and even have sex with the TV off and watch TV at a different time. It's also possible to eat in bed and not make a mess or even to clean it up if you do.

@lerlo It seems that nowadays , folks have strong feelings about pretty much everything and anything ! I'm sure the responses were entertaining ...

Like I said - doesn't mean there's anything wrong with liking these preferences.

@evergreen the reason for my post is that the questions seem ridiculous or at least the topics. I'm sure they don't have a question about whether you like crunchy or creamy peanut butter. Or do you clean your house once a week or once a month. Obviously somebody is sensitive to TVs in the bedroom and eating in bed. What that has to do with dating is beyond me. There's no question about how many times you eat onions in a day which could affect your breath which could affect your date.

@lerlo Wow - this is a conundrum huh ? Simple solution - you don't like the question, don't answer it !

@evergreen My hope was that someone might have a legitimate answer for the purpose of those questions. I didn't answer those questions. I was shocked to find out there are particular reasons for certain rooms in your house and apparently there are rules that did not come with my house. 🤣🤣🤣

1

I may not be the best person to answer as I am exactly one week in to online dating sites. But, weird question and if you can, skip it. Who cares? I don't have a TV in the bedroom or eat in bed usually, unless I am sick. But not a criteria for who I would date 🙂

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Never had a TV in the bedroom- until this house. Only thing I can attribute it to is - once you retire a lot of little things about how you live - change. As for eating in bed......I'm way to klutzy to do that. I even bought one of those nice bed trays....ended up in the guest room. (the tray, not me.....ha!)

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Sin is a made up concept.
TV, not during my 25 year marriage. Since then, absolutely, because I don't have to worry about disturbing anyone. But I actually rarely turn it on in the evening. Mostly it is a weekend morning indulgence.
As for eating in bed, occasionally, but nothing that makes crumbs.

I'm pretty sure all concepts are made up

@lerlo you're welcome! Compliments of the Institute for Repetitive Reiterative Redundancy.

@lerlo but seriously, concepts are constructs. And some of those concepts are actually based on legitimate observations, as opposed to delusions or confusion. Gravity is a concept.

@MikeInBatonRouge seriously, because you deem something a "concept" engulfed in a "construct" it's all subjective and made up. The sky is a concept, ghosts are a concept and the lions ever getting to a super bowl is a concept.

@lerlo I don't have to deem it. As long as we're having fun quibbling, every word is an abstraction, and therefore a concept, not absolute, because there is always some subjectivity of perspective, in language. BUT, I used the phrase, "made up," which means "not true." ...and you repeated it back to me. A concept is not necessarily false or not true. It is merely abstract. There is such a thing as concrete reality separate and apart from our subjective understanding of it. Gravity is still real. Sin is not. Therefore it is made up, and gravity is not, even though both are concepts.

@MikeInBatonRouge you don't believe in morality? Morality isn't a concept? Morality isnt a construct?

@lerlo Of course morality is a concept! I DON'T believe in it as factual natural law. I DO support it as useful, really vital, for living harmoniously within society.

But thank you for picking a concept that nicely illustrates that not all concepts are equal. Not all are built on equivalent foundations. Morality is NEITHER true nor false. It is a value based concept. It is certainly subjective, but not a matter of truth or falseness. There are all kinds of moralities. Read up on secular humanism, and you will see rational reasons for arguing for certain morality principles, which I certainly support instead of magical-thinking religeously based morality arguments. But either way, morality is still based on subjective values ultimately.

On the religeous side of the issue we have "sin." Imaginary man in the sky says something is sin, and THAT is why we are expected to accept it as such. That is bullshit. That is made up. The secular humanist morality is based on subjective preference for certain kinds of societal outcomes and observations as to what behaviors encourage those outcomes. Subjective but not false.

@MikeInBatonRouge a sin can be somebody violating someone's morality. Just cuz you don't like the word doesn't mean it isn't a concept

@lerlo WTF? I never said it isn't a concept; nor did I imply it. Don't twist my words.
It is also easy enough for people to construct multiple concepts around the same word. Try reading entries in a dictionary sometime. But the origins of that particular term are religeous, and that remains its primary framework.

You also might just want to reconsider your use of "mortal sin" in your post. No wonder you got reactions. Someone having a strong preference for dating partners who share their aversion to tv bedrooms is a far cry from a different preference being a "mortal sin." You grabbed a term broadly understood in religeous context and misapplied it.

@MikeInBatonRouge Bad memory?
"Sin is a made up concept." "Gravity is still real. Sin is not." So sin IS a concept but it's not a real one 🙂 Since you admit its all subjective, not for you to say what's real and what's not. Who is twisting whose words? 🙂 I misapplied what you say isn't a real concept? How can I misapply a fake concept? You're digging your hole deeper.

@lerlo We are quite apparently applying different meanings to terminology. "Made up" does not mean something is not a concept. It means it is a concept based on imaginary or erroneous premises.

Again, subjective does not mean false or made up. It only means based on a personal perspective. You are confused by terminology and laughing at me for your confusion.

Enjoy your "mortal sin" tv. Good luck dating! 😬

1

Guilty and guilty! 🤷🏻♀️

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I guess differences of opinion in either cause breakups? Glad to hear realistic criteria instead of religion or politics.

That's an excellent point.

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I have a hard time sleeping. When we had a tv in the bedroom, my ex was prone to leaving it on while she fell asleep. So if I fell asleep first, I was ok. but at some point the tv would wake me up. Asked her to use the snooze timer so it would shut off when she fell asleep, but she wouldn't.. so no more tv in the bedroom. I would say here the problem is the lack of consideration of one partner for the other.. as manifested in the device... is the actual problem. Moving the device, removes that problem.

0

A couple of things about a TV in the bedroom: 1) people who have one may have really whacked sleep routines, because the flickering light will keep many people from falling asleep or from having quality sleep. 2) How much stimulation do people need? A lot of times when I'm in a customer's house it looks like they're using the TV as a way to avoid thought and feeling.

Surprisingly you can shut the television off when you go to sleep or at other times during the day. 😛🤣 As for thoughts and feelings there are all kinds of people without those regardless of television

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My views on these are, first, it's not really a mortal sin to do either one of these, just mostly unpopular. The one that has more issues is eating in bed b/c it assumes you'll have minute pieces fall from your foods and contaminate the bed which may be unhealthy or unappealing. The TV thing suggests you may be a TV addict which, may imply your less intellectual, though that may not really be true.

you know what happens when you assume. Some people may clean their beds if they leave crumbs and amazingly not all people who watch tv are idiots or addicts...even if the TV is in the bedroom, or the kitchen or the patio...

I try not to assume anything, just mentioning what seems likely to be a general opinion of many. It's not personal, so please don't take it that way.

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I have a TV in the bedroom but I don't use it much. As for eating in bed, not really a fan of making a mess.. I prefer the dining room table for my meals. Its more comfortable for me..

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I guess it give people some insight into the person ie are you a tv in the bedroom person or not and some people find others eating in bed gross. I know when I was in hospital I refused to eat in bed. My breakfast would be brought in and I would call for a nurse to help me get to the chair (knee surgery so unsteady and had to have a nurse with me) The one time I ate in bed in the hospital I had food crumbs in the bed when they came to help me to my shower I hated it.

I found it terribly uncomfortable to eat in a hospital bed. Who wants to eat lying down?! It's just awkward.

@AmyTheBruce I could sit up but my movement was limited as I could not move my leg without help, but eating in bed is not something I can handle.

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Who needs a TV anymore?

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Not good idea to have a TV in bedroom or eat in bedroom. I don't have a TV in bedroom.

Nezie Level 3 Aug 3, 2020
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Porn? And they didn't specify what you eat in bed wink wink nudge nudge lol

I don't know though. Maybe if there's no TV you focus more on your partner without distraction? And eating... i donno? Maybe that's a thing that bothers someone if their partner does it, and they don't? Or maybe you are viewed as a slob or something?

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Here is a scene form the movie "Being There" which exaggerates the reason very well.

Thanks for the research. I don't know any woman who would turn down breakfast in bed. Of course Mr. Rogers Trump's all! 🤣😁😁

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I think as a way to get a more rounded view of a person, the questions-and importantly, others-allow someone to assess you.

I never, ever eat in bed. While I have a television, it hasn't been plugged in since February. I use to for NFL football. World Cup Soccer, and the Olympics. Only. I would not have one in the bedroom.

I noticed you conspicuously left out the reasons why you won't eat in bed or have a television in your bedroom

@lerlo To me, the bed is for sleeping and sex. I think eating in bed is a bit of a lay habit, not to mention you invariably spill, sprinkle crumbs, etc.

@lerlo You are correct. I left out my reasons because they are not up for debate.

  • Edited to add: oops, I meant to post that elsewhere.

@AmyTheBruce sorry you decided they would be up for debate if you listed them

@lerlo I forgot to mention the single most important reason why I do not eat in bed: It is unhealthy to eat within 3-4 hours of going to bed.

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Why are you asking? Could it be that you are afraid if sinning ? There are of course other reasons for disliking TV and food in the bedroom

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