Great article. I've been single, married, and single again so will weigh in on this: I love being single.
I was single while being wedded. It is referred to as an open marriage. We negotiate the terms & keep the benefits that government & law bestows. No children were involved. Number 1. Separate living arrangements a must. Number 2 Number 3 each is beneficiary to the other. Number 4 no sexual obligation. Worked for 21 years. He was a odd a man as I am a woman. Few men would agree to what we found natural. I would never have married save for the benefits. Thusly gay folks, mixed raced couples, mixed religious couples had to have legal access to a marriage certificate.
men are not meant to be monogamous!
spread the seed gents even if its blanks
i think itd be hard to wake up to the same person daily and having to accept all the negative traits of that person
the implications alone can eat ur brain
be careful out there tom u seem susceptible
I was with my late wife from 1995 to 2015, when we were medically separated because of her dementia getting bad enough that we had to live apart until her death two years later. I kept visiting her regularly after we had to live apart. Before her dementia began in 2011, those 16 good years with her were the best years of my adult life and I still cherish them. I also still have a strong memory of how much I was getting tired of being single the last several years before I met her. So I have a clear picture and plenty of data to go on in seeing how much better my life was with my wife than before her as well as what my life has been like as a widower for really the last five years, after she was already gone for the most part from the dementia.
Most coupled women I know, stay in their relationship for financial reasons, with a weird kinda of love for their “man”. I know very few who are happy. Being a boomer we are fed that dream of meeting your prince, who will have your back and work with you toe to toe and fulfill his dreams. It took eleven years to unpack that crap. I am so thankful I ditched all the jerks that came into my life back then and even more thankful I could afford to financially. I haven’t dated in five years and doubt I’ll ever date again. .
I have married for religion, then for money, then for sex, then for selfless love... all went badly.
Everyone has their own interpretation of what everything is and what everything means, but we all run around acting as if it's all the same. It's not.
The only way a marriage can continue is if at least one person is willing to sacrifice their dreams and who they really are deep inside and be the agent representing the other person's dreams. Those are the great marriages, the "great institutions" of our country, which typically evolve to the two becoming increasingly distanced, symbolic, and business-like, often with at least one of the two having much rumored affairs, which never alarm the other person.
It takes very special people to find that kind of life fulfilling. I will never be one of those. Call me free spirit. Piss on other peoples expectations and their stupid opinions...
People discriminate for every possible difference under the sun: Not from around here. Pronounces words funny. Doesn't act "mature". Doesn't attend services regularly. Sets the trash can on the wrong side of the drive. Doesn't have the correct degree. Has no common sense. Has too many degrees. Nobody can talk with them. Talks about others all the time. Talks about the wrong people. Has too many kids. Doesn't have any kids. Doesn't pay enough time with the kids. Spends too much on the kids. Spends too much on golf. Doesn't have a nice car. Can't take care of anything. Cuts the grass too short. Uses too much fertilizer. Doesn't care about the environment. Is a tree huggger. Drives a gas hog. Drives a "foriegn" vehicle. Always out in the yard. Never comes outside. Works nights, sleeps in the afternoons.
It is difficult being single. On top of the money made by single men being less, women often make less too. The last time I was single I was a boarder simply so I could have a decent standard of life.
I’m very fond of my partner, but for the first time ever, with frozen wage rates and inflation not doing the same, I’m struggling to be a self funding single woman.
The wages are much poorer in the UK, (than Australia), and rents take up a much larger percentage of your wage.
It certainly is a factor in living with a partner in the UK, I only once lived with a partner in Aus. and was much happier having my own space.
Then there are couples’ rail cards 2 4 1 meals and buying in bulk being cheaper. Why should singles pay double? So many messed up examples of single people being discriminated against.