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How do people feel about people who are childless?

Do you think it is the case that very many people feel that it is a bad thing to not have any children? Do many people in our society feel it is bad, or perhaps simply sad or unfortunate, for a person or couple to never bear a child or adopt any?

AlasBabylon 8 May 19
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64 comments

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6

Religious people feel it is very "sinful" for a couple to choose childlessness. Non religious people, you get a variety of reactions.

SKH78 Level 8 May 19, 2018
8

I think if you don't want children you should not have them. How tragic to be brought into the world when you're unwanted. I think everyone needs to make the responsible choice. Don't make babies unless you're sure you want them and can take care of them. I applaud any woman who makes the choice NOT to have children because she does not want them. She is doing what is best for her and the child. One of my girls is the greatest aunt ever, but does not want to have babies. She has never wanted to have babies. Her body, her life, her choice and I support her and every other woman making that choice. And for the guys, if you don't want to have children, make sure you're not spilling fertile seed.

great closing

5

I'm childless. Tho I've had a few 'instant' family situations in my time, & currently have 3 "step" grandkids, whom I love dearly, I was really never the father type, so just as well not to get in that situation.

5

I work in child welfare and I don't want people who don't want children to have them. It is a personal choice either way.

5

I'm happily childless and am surprised when people express anger at my choice. I just don't get how it affects them to the point of anger.

They're not angry with your choice... they're angry with your happiness about it. I have no kids... by choice. I just don't tell people I'm happy about it, but (if they really want to know) that it was a choice.

1

I'm childless, though sometimes with a little regret. Plenty of nieces and nephews though...

4

I don’t have any children of my own. I remain close to my 2 step children, and their mom, after their dad died suddenly last year.
It has taken a while to shift my mindset from being unhappy I hadn’t had children to being thankful I don’t have children. At 45 I’m enjoying the freedom not having children has given my life now and planning my future plans.

3

It is not bad not to want children. It is sad if someone who wants children can't have any. Adoption sometimes works.

3

I have two step children, no biological offspring. I'm good with it.

2

They're lucky.

5

I'm childless and I love it 🙂

5

I quite like being childless. There are lots of people who have children, and don't want them, or had a child to "fix" their marriage. I feel terribly for them.

7

I've never had children and I don't give a flying rat's ass what society thinks about that.
I think it's really none of anyone's business why someone doesn't have children.
To be honest, it's pretty messed up that some people think it's okay for them to comment
on what other people do (not referring to you-it feels like you have a reason behind your
question), regarding whether they have children.
There are far too many people who have no business being parents.
No one has any room to criticize those who aren't parents, regardless of the reasons.

totally agree with you

Thats my girl ??

❤ \m/ ❤

2

I haven't got any

5

As a woman in my 20's and 30's, I was relentlessly pressured by people to have children. At work, at the gym, from family and friends. It was nonstop. But I was adamantly against having kids.

"You're so intelligent, we need your genes in the gene pool!" As if that's a good reason to have a child.

For five years, my husband and I couldn't agree about having kids. First one of us wanted kids; then we switched positions. We took parenting classes together.

"We have 12 years of YMCA program director experience between us," we said, skipping stones on the Icicle River. "Wouldn't this be fun to share with a child?"

During the 10 minutes we agreed, we conceived. Claire was born when I was 36 and Terry was 40.

I hope the ten minutes were enjoyable. Ha. How did it work out, did you enjoy the experience, did the marriage last, was the marriage better or worse after the child?

@Aquaeyes, that is a personal question that I refuse to answer. It's complicated.

@LiterateHiker so sorry I didn't want to upset you.

@Aquaeyes, Thank you. I prefer to focus on the positive.

For Mother's Day, Claire made this collage on her I-phone when she was 23. "Will you send me pictures of you and me together when I was growing up?" she asked.

I love it! This picture is framed and hanging on the wall.

4

Not having biological children is doing the rest of us a favour as far as limited resources and pollution go. I consider it selfless these days. They should be rewarded.

5

Sometimes being childless is a choice. My best friend and her husband have been married 30 yrs and chose not to have children but are a mentor to my daughter and couldn't have more love to give. They chose to live a different life, and it's a beautiful one.

2

It's their business. Left to myself, I probably wouldn't have either married or had children.

3

I don't feel positively or negatively for childless people. They are like people with brown hair vs people with blonde hair...just people.

1

I feel bad because my mom wants grand kids and I don’t want children. She talks about it constantly and it doesn’t help that all of her sisters (7 of them) all have grand kids.

2

Bringing children into the world is a choice. Not bringing children into the world is a choice. That choice is up to the people involved and it is no one else's business. Too many children are born as a result of not thinking about the consequences of an act. Some of them are fortunate to have parents who, though surprised by the results of their passion, were delighted to have them. Sadly that doesn't happen very often. Sometimes it is an inconvenience for one or the other or perhaps both parents.

There are many possibilities, but I won't outline them all. Speaking to your specific question, yes, it is an issue for the majority of people in the world. It is how the species is preserved, and increasingly it is how numbers of members in various religions are bolstered. At one time it was important because lifespans were short, life was hard, and it was a matter of survival. Those conditions are long gone for most regions of the world. However, this idea that people should have children has carried over and is in force today as it was in centuries past.

The majority of the people in the world make the assumption that everyone should and will have children. This is largely because of the religions of the world, some worse than others, expecting their members to produce children like an assembly line that pumps out more and more obedient carriers of the flame. So, yes, most people think people who don't want children are somehow not normal, whatever that is, and that they need to be convinced to have them. I think this is a wrong mindset. That I think it is wrong does not change it. As in so many other things, it is something we need to outgrow, and I think I see some glimmering of hope that we are in the process of doing that now.

2

My daughter and her partner are childless. Thank goodness as he is a drunk alcoholic ?

@Purplegirl1974
She does not hate kids. Think she would have loved to have at least one. Because of circumstances here in S.A. I do not like kids anymore either. ,

3

Societal norms (man, I hate those things) do pressure folks to have kids.
.
But have them or not, ain't none of my business.

2

I believe having, or not having them is a highly personal choice. Society-parts of it- may feel bad about folks choosing to have no kids...but that’s THEIR opinion. And none of their business.
Wouldn’t the world be so much better if we all just minded our own effing business?!

2

For me having kids was a personal growth experience. Before the kids I was self-focused and self-absorbed. That changed. Suddenly you can't do what you would like to do, there are two are beings to consider and look after. It was the most challenging experience in my life and I'm glad they ended up as good human beings even though both are in their 20's now and I rarely see them.
I've had a few dates with women who never had kids. They were still stuck in the state I was in once.
Now if you choose not to have kids there are plenty of charitable organizations you can get involved in and donate to.

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