I know you’re looking for answers from men but my 2 cents, for what it’s worth, is that they’re too afraid of a perceived stigma. They aren’t confident enough to say FU to anyone who may judge them.

I'm not a man, but my guess would be that many men don't fully accept Trans-women as women (especially after reading some of these comments where Trans-women are referenced interchangeably as both Trans-women and as men). To be attracted to a Trans-woman as a heterosexual man, does not make that man homosexual. A Trans-woman is a woman. Many heterosexual men are afraid to be seen as gay (even though there is also nothing wrong with that) because society says that men must always be strong and that to be feminine, weak, vulnerable, or gay is to be inferior--which is wrong.

I have dated transgender women and have had no issue taking them out for dinner or drinks. I treat them like I would any other date I would go out with

Thank you for all these answers. It is quite enlightening. There is hope out there.
Yes, I can understand the fear of the stigma attached to dating transwoman. Someone made the mention that dating a trans woman make you gay. That is such a poor comment.
Personally and most of trans like me are not interested at all in gay men.
We all searching for the same thing, love. Love does make life more bearable in a lot of instances. Best wishes to you all.

I think having a long-term relationship with a transwoman would mean that I'd need to at some point be open and honest with the people I care about regarding that fact. That seems like it would be pretty difficult as some of those close to me may reject the concept and my partner without getting to know them. I think that would be the difference between a quick encounter and a long-term relationship.

Because some men are boys and not men.

I would say most straight men only attracted to CIS women think you aren't women. A lot of CIS women don't think you are women. A lot of gay men don't think you are women. SOME or maybe even a lot of straight men that ARE in to transwomen, although they are attracted to you, are afraid of what society thinks about the issue, and because straight men only attracted to CIS women - and others, view you as not being women, it spills over into what some of the straight men that are attracted to you think about themselves. They don't want to go through any ridicule that society would put on them. It's ultimately their own insecurity, but I think it's similar to masculine gay men who also don't want the stigma of society and all the issues it brings them, so they hide who they are for fear or ridicule or whatever discrimination they might go through in their life. I think people SHOULD be able to be who they are without all the judging as long as they aren't hurting someone. Unfortunately, there are a lot of small minded people out there who don't care about others who they deem less than worthy or who they view as lower than themselves. That's sad. I also don't think that the masculine gay man hiding who he is, or the trans attracted man who hides it, should be judged either. They are going through internal struggles too, and to label them or ridicule them is in turn doing what someone putting those groups down, including those who put transwomen down, is doing. You just have to try to remember that it has nothing to do with YOU, and has everything to do with THEM and their own struggle.

Damn good question. I don't know.

I can only speak for myself. If I am attracted to someone and the chemistry is there, we will be seen in public, because we will be spending time together socially and otherwise.

Just had a light go off recently, always been attracted to girls, I had crushes as young as 5, long before I knew what sex was I yearned for them. I lived in SF in my late teens, most of my friends and neighbors were gay, no problem but no interest. One neighbor, David, was just different, feminine and lovely, I just had this urge to cherish and protect him(?). Looking back, he had to be trans, I don't know what he was going through, he was very shy and SF in the seventies was probably the most accepting place he could find. His housemate and partner identified as a gay man and he did also by default. Hope he figured it out and had a good life.

Transwoman is a special kind of woman that needs a special kind of man, that's all. Check Erin Anderson on Facebook as an example

Depends on the man I suppose. I have never dated a trans woman, but I am more curious, and am not opposed to the idea. As to being seen in public? Honestly I have no idea. I don't think that would be a problem for me. Anyone else? I am curious on the thought process on this one as well.

I have a friend who was fortunate enough to find someone who was also transgender they are having a great time.

Because all they want is a semen receptacle.

I'm a stats guy and while my personal, anecdotal experience counters all the stats I've seen on trans women, I know transitioning is an emotional roller coaster for many.

I've known two M-F trans people whose wives chose to be lesbians rather than divorce their former husbands. I think that's really cool and likely helped those women transition a ton, but both women were still unstable for a bit. I'm happy to say the trans woman I know best went from a very angry young man to a mature and chill lesbian 25 years later. The 2nd woman struggles with depression a lot.

I don't rule out dating trans women, but so far only one trans woman has shown any interest in me and she wasn't emotionally stable. Being trans would just be one factor among many for me personally. If I found a fit, emotionally and financially stable trans women, I'd consider dating but it's hard enough to find that in any middle-aged people of any gender.

Personally, I think you are lovely. As to whether or not we could hang out, I'd have to get to know you first. And anything else would definitely have to wait til I knew you better. Call me old fashioned if you wish - that's just who I am.

Lots of men did / still do this type of thing with gay men . Since the legalising of gay marriage it may be different it would be insteresting to find out . Being Trans is a new thing at the moment so it may just be society experimenting ( wish I had a better word to describe it) and pushing boundaries . But as there are 7 billion people on the planet all different it's difficult to find someone no matter what your background is

If a man doesn't want to be seen with someone, that's pretty self explanatory. I'm not concerned with what someone has between their legs, I like people for who they are. Then I have this nasty habit of actually looking in people's eyes instead of staring at body parts. That said I' find many trans women, especially androgynous types , incredibly attractive. All tend to be hyper feminine ( anyone who says trans women aren't women, has never bothered to look one in the eyes ). As far as going out in public, I couldn't give a rat's backside what anyone else thinks , the only concern I might have is that such a fine person might be embarrassed to be seen with me.

Ever been to Thailand? I've meet plenty of Americans (and others), typically Caucasian male, dating and some marrying transgender Thai women. Why do you suppose that is? Maybe it has more to do with public acceptance or the lack thereof in this country.

I am struck by the reasonable responses. Thank you guys for being so.