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Does anyone else feel conflicted about dating? No? Just me?

TheoryNumber3 8 Apr 4
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12 comments

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1

That looks like a dilemma only female introverts experience.

3

Dating is a interview for a potential partner. A partner can not bring me anything that I do not already have. As an introvert I don't require human companionship, tho I have live in "help". But I have nothing but trepidation concerning the dating scene. I already met him & he is already gone. Widowed in '18.

Mooolah Level 8 Apr 5, 2021
2

Friends with benefits, and everybody maintains separate residences!

I'm lucky, to build tiny houses I'll build a tiny castle without the hassle for my lover, next to mine.

I'd like more than a FWB relationship, but I'm right there with you on the separate residences, Anne

@TheoryNumber3 i always thought the English Aristocracy had a good idea with completly separate wings in a mansion

@AnneWimsey Hey there's a thought. Now where do I find a man with a mansion?

5

I enjoy people. I enjoy intimacy. I loved being married. I find men my age are either trumpsters, control freaks, impotent or married. That means I settle for friendship.

Initial attraction is almost always the result of appearance. I've been widowed for 8 years and 3 years ago, I still attracted a lot of attention. In other words, my aloneness is compounded by the fact that guys are picky as well.

I am thankful that I have a great social life but my lack of an intimate companion is not by choice but circumstance.

Lorajay Level 9 Apr 5, 2021
4

Why I have spent the past five years alone! And talking to several of my married friends, the idea of being with someone again just gives me cold chills! It would have to be someone very special. Since I haven’t even been able to get so much as a lunch date in years I am holding out little hope.

When i come to Lancaster in my little RV, I will take You for lunch! My treat!

@AnneWimsey come on down! 😄

5

The more you try, the more you are alone!!!

At a certain age why put up with others BS, when you can barely contain your own BS!!!

Why be involved with those with more problems than you have!!!

Alone not lonely sums it up best!!!
Sometimes!!!

LOL!!!

3

Why did I just sing that while reading it? Lol!

Unity Level 7 Apr 5, 2021

Gee... I wonder LMAO!!!

5

Hit the nail on the head. I've been getting out the house more lately and had some attention shown by the fairer sex. When I get the urge to make a move, I ask myself do I really want to pursue this woman? Or do I just want to go back under my rock, watch a movie and eat cheetos? Cheetos win every time

3

Just keep them on the periphery. Never let them move in....it takes away the romance and obligations are expected like washing their clothes or cooking. Plus they want to take over the tv remote control and worse,making decisions for 'both of you'. Then there's the maintenance.....waxing, shaving, hair cuts, nails, exercise. Once a month date is optimum (for me in any case). It's nice to dress up once a month and enjoy time with a man. Other weekends, I'd rather slouch at a girlfriends in my daggies and no bra. 😀

Well I agree with part of that. I'd never want to live with anyone again. Like the song says... "How can I miss you if you won't go away?"

1

Too much Baggage?

Everyone has too much baggage these days

@TheoryNumber3 If you've reached a certain age and you've got no baggage, one has to wonder how you've lived your life~

@MsDemeanour
I left my baggage long ago and I want them to drop theirs too. Then I will love them, warts and all.

@Castlepaloma What do you mean by baggage? What others may see as my 'baggage' is what makes me who I am. I still carry love in my heart for my husband tho he has been dead over 20 years. Is my home that I love my baggage? The friends and family I have that surround me and support me and love me? Are they baggage because I wouldn't move away from them? My dog? My phobia around crowds? I left home at 17 with only a suitcase as baggage. I can't be that person again and don't want to be.

@MsDemeanour

Those seem more like fond memories.

Baggage, is with obsessive emotional baggage? — unresolved emotional turmoil from the past— to a new relationship.

@Castlepaloma Oh ok. I suppose like the person who was a victim of domestic violence and has developed a fear of relationships. Or the man who hates women because his ex took his house and kids. Well I guess I'd prefer a relationship with someone who was comfortable in themselves and the world.

@MsDemeanour
Me too.

@MsDemeanour I think we're talking about the negative crap that people tend to bring to a relationship, and sometimes causes its early demise. That crap.

5

I get more socializing then I want at the drive trough at Dell Taco.

Ooh... that's tough.

That's the saddest thing I've read all day. Tell you what, if international travel ever opens up you can visit me. 😀

@MsDemeanour

You maybe really surprised.

3

I used to take my time to get to know them before sex. To find out if they have STDs than later it was aids.
Today Government wants us to wear two layers of masks and a plastic coat over our bodies.
Can't afford to take them out so my dates now are mostly with palm-me Anderson

That’s what they invented Fleshlights for! Give Ms Palm a break! 😁

Cheat on yourself. Use your other hand

@TheoryNumber3

I can count five (finger) girlfriends on each hand.

@Castlepaloma You cad! I thumb my nose at you 🙂

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