Ok ladies, help me out here. Please help me understand and let me know what I'm missing. Here's the scenario: You're walking in your neighborhood park day or night with other people usually around. An unassuming man, wearing sweats, is approaching you from the opposite direction. As he passes, he says "hello." You ignore him and refuse to make eye contact. You do this because a) if you say hello and make eye contact you might get raped because rapists only rape friendly women or b) you're just anti-social and nothing says you have to say hello to a stranger or be polite. Is there another reason? Having a bad day perhaps? Should the man be impolite and not force a woman into such a horrible scenario by saying hello?
Or maybe it just ain't all about you, dude.
Jeez, someone blanked you, and you're getting so cut up about it that you're going to jump on the internet and start picking fights with people?!
She might have had earbuds in that you didn't see. She might have been distracted. She might have a past that makes her nervous of all strangers. She might be an introvert who finds interactions with strangers difficult. She might be a raging feminist lesbian. She might be an alien shapeshifter who is new to this whole having-a-human-body thang.
It. Doesn't. Matter.
She. Doesn't. Owe. You. A. Response.
She. Doesn't. Owe. You. Shit.
Get over it.
Get over yourself.
it is okay to say hello. it is also okay to understand that the person to whom you're saying hello may have been raped once, may be distracted by worries and only really be half aware you even spoke, may not like your looks, may like your looks but be shy, may not speak english, may be an unfriendly person (and how does that impact your life for more than a moment?) or may be deaf. those are only SOME of the possibilities. i wouldn't fret over it. your a and b scenaria are not very likely.
It’s interesting because I’m super smiley and friendly . . . and I’ve said hello to men while walking at my local park and they don’t say anything in response. Same happens with some women. I think there are lots of complicated issues here and not a simple explanation. I try not to take it personally. On a side note: I consider 3 of the young people I work with incredibly unfriendly, so I don’t think it necessarily has to do with age.
Where I come from it is normal for people to say hello to complete strangers. I do it every day if the week. I would have said hello back, and probably (being British) have added something about the weather that day....nice day...colder today or some such thing, Seems pretty innocuous to me.
Would you even be asking this if it was a man? Who knows? We don't read minds. Perhaps her dog just died, she's remembered her library book is overdue or just doesn't like the way you look. Perhaps she responded too late and missed the opportunity to reply. Perhaps she's deaf. Rape? Most women are all too aware that 90% of rapes are perpetrated by people they know unfortunately (https://rapecrisis.org.uk/mythsvsrealities.php) because 1 in 4 women have had this experience. Rape is about a power struggle, disrespect and dominance. Maybe this starts with thinking because you say, 'hello' they are obliged to respond (because they are female?) Who knows?
I really like to smile and be friendly. I would like to feel free to exchange a few words with people as I meet them informally but it just isn't done anymore. This new loss of sociability can't be good for anyone but I think we need to go with the flow so as not to worry people.