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I'm on a roll today.........I haven't posted anything in a while, and today, this is my second!
I was contacted by a man on POF. He said he was looking for a "humble" woman. The minute I read that word, I think "submissive/meek/walk two steps behind a man/weak". I also think "religious". I HATE it! Ladies and gentlemen, what do you think when you see that? And if you are wondering, I messaged him back "I don't think you read my profile".

AzVixen52 7 June 21

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There is a great deal of entropy in communications because words carry different meanings and are subject to misinterpretation. Humility can be a virtue when it describes that is unassuming, unpretentious or modest. It might have been kinder if you had messaged him, "What do you mean by humble?" I too am sometimes guilty of jumping to conclusions.
One of my favorite quotations: "What we've got here is a failure to communicate." - The Captain


The part of humility I like is not being a braggart. After that it can go suck royal purple donkey wang.


Humility is far overrated. I find it amusing when arrogant people accuse others of lacking humility. I am not humble.


Looking for "terrific" and "radiant" as well

Perhaps he is "some pig".

@AzVixen52 that was truly funny


Humble? YAWN... Hehehehehe.

I agree, I don't THINK he read your profile, we have some new peeps invading us of late, whom don't seem to be able or are willing to read profiles and their are REALLY BRIEF, (and I don't mean sexy jockey undies)!

Suspecting some are FAKES, no?

Have fun, stay on your roll! Keep us informed. =🙂

This happened on POF, not here, but I agree with your statement.

@AzVixen52 THEY ARE EVERYWHERE, truly...

Some are easier to spot than others.

When I find someone who contacts me who is suspicious, I then look at who else they are following- then often connect with the other women to compare notes on here.

We have gotten a few FAKES ousted off since I started on here in April.

Admin on here is WONDERFUL, as you may already know?

BE YOURSELF, this is the only way~


There are a lot of issues with online dating. First off finding quality, non divas. Maybe humble wasn't the best word, and finding the perfect words for who you are writing to is impossible, but it is not an insulting word. He could have been trying not to say "not a diva". Give him a break on that word, there are far worse out there.



He can walk behind you and carry your bags.

I carry my own bags, thank you very much!

@AzVixen52 I know .. I just get worked up...

@Bigwavedave ?


Probably a 99% chance that's a foreign scammer.

Nope, he lives in Phoenix, my city.

@AzVixen52 That may be even worse!! I'd dump him asap.

@sewchick57 He's not mine to dump, but I hear ya.


Ask them if they like Gloria Allred then tell them you are a cross between Marget Thatcher and Nancy Grace and that you do not date enslavers. Just a hypothetical thought you might like the humor in that.

azzow2 Level 9 June 21, 2018

I think if it was a stranger contacting me, I'd probably think what you thought.

But, for me personally I think humility - in both men and women - is an impressive trait. Especially in the presence of obvious talent or intellect.

Now if I got to know someone first, and noticed that they were very talented at something, or if they possessed great academic and/or social intelligence, but still maintained an "aw shucks" attitude, I would think it appropriate to comment on their humility.

I don't understand the humility thing. Sure there are plenty of people that play better than I do but if someone compliments my playing, i accept it and thank them. For me, it's certainly not aww shucks it's nothing. I've put hours and hours of practice in over decades. That's not nothing. Plus, someone says to you 'that was great, i really enjoyed it' and you say 'oh it's nothing' you're kind of dismissing them.
Sure I don't go around saying 'hi I'm jimmy and I'm an awesome.....'

Sorry to digress. Humble? Why would anyone be looking for humble? That's weird 🙂


Was that the only thing he said he was looking for in a woman? I guess I don't think red flag with the word humble (I don't equate it with meek, submissive), but if that was all he listed it would be a little strange as the one quality he is looking for in a partner/date.

I felt no need to look past "humble".


What I think is that he sounds dangerous (or into BDSM in which case he should be up front about it.) Domestic violence dangerous, not edgy, bad-boy dangerous.
He may not be, but then he ought to chose his language with more care.


Asking for someone to judge themselves to be humble beings, and then expect them to, in essence, shout out "'I'm humble. Over here. See me being humble." Just strikes me as sooo off. No way anyone can win.

Holli Level 6 June 21, 2018

on your knees

btroje Level 9 June 21, 2018

Do cis, hetero men ever read women's profiles?
Usually, no.
That's why they typically don't write their own profiles since they usually start hitting on the most attractive women they can find, by photo alone.

I think the ratio of men to women is 25. Most of us guys are 55-60. With no power and no money, I'd say the chances of a guy hooking up here are pretty remote.

@Dingodog Hooking up? If I even read on someone's profile that they do hook ups or are looking for action on the side, although married, I go ahead and block them.

@birdingnut I was trying to be hip. I don't even know what hooking up is for sure. I assume it means casual sex. But either way even if I wanted to, , I have far too much responsibility on my family plate right now and for the rest of our lives to complicate it with some asinine move like that. My point was, that if someone my age has a lot of money, or a lot of power, then their attractive quotient goes up. For me, I had to give up my position to care for my wife 24/7. So, we lost my income and her income and we're hoping to get approved for SSDI and some miracles. I don't know what to call what we need otherwise. Big breaks? So, I'd score pretty low given those parameters. But I'm not shopping. I don't know why I'm still typing. And that's all I havev to say about that.


That sounds "religious" to me also. Even without the overtones of religion, I doubt I would be interested in a humble woman.

If all I wanted was somebody to be an echo chamber of my own thoughts, I don't need anyone else. I go that covered already.

@Renickulous The problem is that you know what you mean when you "say" but your audience may hear a different meaning. This thread illustrates the point. To George, humility carries religious and submissive connotations.

@Renickulous Entropy is inherent in all communication.

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