We need silliness this morning so here is an archaic word and some background about it:
Crinkum-Crankum: An archaic word describing elaborate decoration or detail, something with a lot of twists and turns or a vulgar reference to woman's private parts.
Francis Grose explained in his Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue, in 1784 that in a law book (A Law Dictionary by Thomas Blount, 1670) that a widow would forfeit her lands and possessions if she was caught in amorous conversation but she might reclaim them if she appeared at the next manor-court, riding backwards on a black ram with his tail in her hand and reciting the follow words:
Here I am,
Riding on a black ram,
Like a whore that I am:
And for my crinkum-crankum,
Have lost my binkum-bankum;
And for my tail's game
Am brought this worldly shame.
Therefore Mr. Steward let me have my lands again.
If you ever wondered why women seem to be pissed off by laws relating strictly to females, this may give you a clue.