So sorry.

I am really sorry. Xoxo.

My condolences to you and your family.

Some people refuse to see their loved ones that way to keep only good memories especially if they're not responsive so you're not actually helping them by being a comfortable presence. Also, really who wud wish more time of suffering to a loved one.
I guess your brother and your reaction comes more of social expectations rather than any true altruistic emotional benefit.

I know how you feel. My parents are in Canada and I in Texas. There’s no way I could make it in time when my father passed. They notified me as they were moving him to ICU, he was gone a few hours later. I got there at 3am, he had passed six hours earlier and was already at the funeral home. It absolutely broke my heart and I felt guilty for a very long time. I hope you and your brother can move past this and grieve together.

Lady A so sorry for your family's loss. Grief has an anger stage. Hope your brother can go through the other stages.

Your brother was clearly under stress....because, actually, what difference did it make whether you were there or not? You are absolutely right not to assume this false burden!

So sorry for your loss

I'm sorry for your loss but this is not your fault. What is, simply - is. Your brother is angry. In time he will understand. My sister died at home in her own bathroom of a heart attack. Everyone blamed her stepson for not reacting in a different way. I saw him privately to explain it was not his fault, and he cried. I hugged him.

I'm so sorry - and you know he didn't understand how badly that would hurt you?

I’m sorry for your loss.

He'll get over it but as bad as I imagine you felt right then, his criticism was the last thing you needed.