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Quick question. What do you guys think of people who don't drink alcoholic beverages for nonreligious purposes but will consume maybe a wine cooler or two a year? Women, does it make you uncomfortable if your date doesnt drink alcohol?

MrChange 7 Oct 8
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7

I'm an alcoholic, been sober for nearly three years now. I hope I'm not judged for it, but I know I will be.

Doubt it. Unless you tell someone. Its actually more commendable that you recognized there is a problem

@josh_is_exciting Thank you. Thank you to everyone here. I'm lucky to have the support of my partner, especially after dumping $1K+ worth of Scotch down the drain when she was out of the apartment (it was an especially bad time for me - this was the moment 3 years ago that I knew I had become an alcoholic and knew I needed to do away with it).

I’m judging you. In a good way. You saw a weakness in yourself that you knew was going to be hard to fix, but you did it anyway. That’s a good thing.

I judge you but I’m a positive light! It’s damn hard to get and stay sober. Kudos to you!

I have fewer issues with those that have reached that point and have to stop for themselves. Kind of a demonstration of will, so good for you.

When pressed on it I can (and have) stopped completely however not sure I will do it again. Never say never but I don't see the point in stopping again for the reasons I did.

4

since i don't drink alcohol myself, why should i think ill of someone else who doesn't? the people of whom i think ill are the pushers: aw come on, just one! one won't hurt you! come on, party pooper! dontcha wanna have a good time? well, yeah, but i can have a good time without alcohol, and if for some reason i couldn't, i hope i would be considerate enough not to make someone else feel as if they had to drink.

g

Thank you. I'm tired of pushers. Reminds me of those people who knock on my door in the mornings about god.

@MrChange oooh i don't like people who knock on my door morning on any topic. i don't do morning. in fact i don't answer doors unless i'm expecting a visitor or a delivery. random knockers are ignored.

g

Yeah, I feel like pushers only do that because they’re insecure about their own drinking

@Marcie1974 hmm, i have a different take on it. it's a control thing. drinkers don't trust nondrinkers and think anyone who's in a clearer state of mind is trying to take control; drinkers also sometimes like to control others, as many addicts do. this goes double if the pusher is pushing a woman.

g

3

I don’t drink alcohol at all, never have my entire life. I find that this lifestyle choice sometimes makes people more uncomfortable than if I would come out and say I was an alcoholic! Over the years people have told me, “why don’t you just carry a drink around to fit in?” or “you’ve just never found the right drink for you!“ and even “guys would definitely be more attracted to you if you had a glass of wine or a beer, your not drinking makes them uncomfortable.” Sometimes it feels a lot like people who try to push their religion!! (At 42 years old, it still happens)

Trust me I know. I'm trying to understand why they do that.

@MrChange I think people push drinking because they feel guilty about their own drinking. Same with non vegetarians and meat.

I can relate to this. I am always the odd one out because I don't drink at all. Quite often people, when they find this out, will then try and convince to drink. Some even get visibly irritated with me when I refuse to play their silly game. I put it down to their insecurities.

5

No, I'm in recovery..12 years, not for alcohol, for heroin,...my point is drink, don't drink...just don't be creepy

Lol. I'll try not to be?

Congrats on 12 years!!

1

I will admit I find it much more difficult to relate to teetotalers.
However I try to keep an open mind and I understand all the benefits that comes from it so good for them.

@icolan simply because I have drank most of my life and all my best people are also there.
I find it isn't really me putting the kibosh on being friends with people that don't drink but they choose not to want to hang with me.

I guess it is a lifestyle choice for me and lifestyles sometimes don't mesh well

I am friends with people that don't drink...just not alot

2

Hmmm. I hardly drink. Does that make me creepy?

No. Lol

2

Having experienced all the fun of being married to a violent drunk, I am Much happier if they drink coffee, or club soda, whrerever we may be.
However, If they remain in control of themselves, I have NO problem, because it is Their choice...i am not their mother!

Agreed

3

Doesn't bother me if he doesn't. I've gotten where I don't enjoy the taste of most alcohol anymore but wouldn't mind a wine cooler.

Agreed.

4

Many people don't drink for non-religious reasons. Some of us just don't see the point and consider it a waste of money and a detriment to good health.
Why would anyone be uncomfortable just because someone doesn't drink?

Some people feel awkward having a drink around non-drinkers, and some people need a drink or two to take the edge off of first date nerves.
I drink, but I prefer not to on a first date. That has resulted in a couple of awkward moments.

2

Not at all! I don't drink much either, use my calories sparingly. I'd much rather enjoy a clear mind, not clouded by alcohol for a great conversation!

Agreed

2

I don't care for the taste of alcohol so on the rare occasions that I drink, it has to be some expensive fruity thing so I pretty much don't drink.

Most of the people I know drink socially but they are accustomed to my abstinence so there is no weirdness

That's awesome

1

More than several of the dates I've met online who listed themselves as social drinkers have gotten completely hammered on the first one or two dates. There's not much of a bigger turn off possible.

Agreed!

0

I don't drink at all anymore. For me, I just didn't like the effect and it felt like going out to the bar was just a stand in for more meaningful free time activities. I want to be more intentional with how I spend the only life I've got.

Not really a problem. I don't discriminate but how likely is it we actually run into each other randomly even in the same town.
If we are friends or acquaintances I wouldn't care at all.

Also for me it would be weird for other reasons

1

More booze to me... ??????

Lol

2

Each to their own

2

I think alot of religions and their rules are hypocritical. It wouldn't make me uncomfortable because i don't drink either.

1

I dont drink at all. I just dont care for it.

Della Level 6 Oct 9, 2018
3

It makes me more uncomfortable when they drink too much liquor. I have never understood people who feel that have to be high to enjoy themselves.

As for me, I very seldom drink because of health reason. Well that and alcoholism/addiction runs rampant in my family.

3

i think it comes down to you do you. if you need alcohol to have a good time as opposed to can have a good time with alcohol its a different game i love alcohol my best friend rarely drinks so most of the time we spend time together alcohol free but occasionally alcohol comes into it luckily im a happy genial drunk. Im pretty sure people on dates don't mind someone not drinking as opposed to drinking to much

3

I don't drink except on special occasions. I put that in my profile. I don't mind if some one i'm with drinks as long as she handles her limits.

3

It doesn't bother me. I like to drink, but seldom do so. Rarely more than once a week, and that's typically with my cigar buddy. I drink so little because of the detrimental effect it has on health. At some point I will likely cut down to just a few times a year.

3

Actually, i would feel comfortable if he doesnt drink.

1

Not much of a drinker myself. I'll drink a couple at the bar when I go out for karaoke night, but that's about the extent of it. Alcoholic beverages could disappear off the face of the earth tomorrow and I really wouldn't care all that much.

1

I don't drink at all now, for health reasons, but I used to drink an occasional martini glass of fine wine in the evenings. I now would prefer to date someone who doesn't drink, although taking cannabis oil is OK.

I also wouldn't date someone who smoked anything, as the smoke could get into my lungs and belongings.

1

Doesn’t bother me at all. I have very little tolerance for it so drink sparingly.

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