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Is it ok that my son is playing lots of sweary rap music to me? Its good but I am thinking I am meant to be growling and telling him to turn that crap off! #shitatparenting!

Amisja 8 Feb 15

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14 comments

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0

Rap is not music. It's poetry set to a beat.

1

I have always let my kids listen to whatever music they like. I don't think censorship of music at home does anybody any good.

Yeah, I have really never censored anything. I alwats said you can check out anything, as long as we get to talk about it. They are sensible children.

@Amisja honesty and open communication are major contributors to raising sensible children.

0

Best thing to do is nothing, unless you find it offensive, in which case, just say no.

Noooo we had fun. Just never shared music or fun times with my Mum...

1

Yes, It's good to let him express himself.

He's 22--he can choose his own music anyway.

2

I think it might be a great idea to have an occasional conversation about the music just to see what he's picking up (especially from the lyrics) and what interests him about the music.

He's an big ass adult...his words

3

My 8 year old loves Snoop. I mean loves. They like what they like.

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I would have to ask first, why wouldn't it be okay? Because of the cussing? The rap?

He's swears at me constantly

@Amisja I can see how you might consider that a problem but I'm still not 100% sure what you're saying here. From your post, it sounds like you're happily accepting of his music and maybe it's something the two of you share? Am I reading it wrong? I personally would be okay if my kids wanted to listen to music with a lot of cussing. The problem would be if they were being deliberately disrespectful toward me. Is that what's going on?

@Amisja is that learned behavior? We do gave to respect our children, as well. We also must teach them to respect us and set boundaries.

@Meili yeah we had a fun day. Its just I remember proper parents who growled at their kid's music. Just wondering if I am doing it wrong

@Meili, @MissKathleen He's 22...that ship has sailed

@Amisja Ah, gotcha. I would say, if it feels right, it's right. Growling usually doesn't feel good for anyone involved.

@Amisja I think your problem has nothing to do with rap that has bad words. A lot of people swear, whether they listen to rap or not. But swearing at your mother?? That's a whole 'nother thing... Doesn't this upset you more? I think it's awful-it's verbal abuse!

@Carin He wasn't swearing at me...this isn't translating well

@Amisja I'm really glad to know that! I was feeling really bad for you!

4

That sounds like first rate parenting to me - it's great that he not only feels he can share something that would anger many parents with you, but apparently wants to, too.

Jnei Level 8 Feb 15, 2019

He does...it does feel a little bit like a competition.

@Amisja Play this back to him 😀

@Jnei he loves it

@Amisja That's music ?, I must be getting old ;-(

1

if its in your house and you don't like it say something

We like to share

@Amisja its all good then

@LeighShelton Yeah but aren't I meant to be all grumpy n pissed off with him?

@Amisja You should be grumpy & pissed off that he swears AT you...I'm puzzled by the focus on rap.

@Amisja your house your rules. it has nothing to do with the music. your not meant to be anything but yourself.

@Carin I am not...he didn't swear at me. The music is sweary but he swears in my presence all the time.

@Amisja so like i said its all good

1

I see Rap simply as another style of music and to each thier own. I’m not into classic rock like someone my age should be. I don’t mind hearing a bit of rap sampled into other genres.
My boys listen to completely different styles of music. They are influenced by culture, thier friends and me to a lesser extent. We just have fun sharing our playlists when we’re in the car and that’s what music is all about

@PalacinkyPDX I agree with you, I can’t do that either.

1

Is it for attention?- we all crave attention bad attention is better than no attention

No we were sharing...I was sharing punk

1

How old is he? Ask who he’s listening to. Research their lyrics. Pay less attention to the swearing and more attention to the overall message. If the rap he likes has a subpar message try playin some Run the Jewels for him. They’re good guys and on the surface they sound as aggressive/profane as most rap without goin overboard, but if you listen closely you’ll notice they’re talking about skepticism, world politics, social issues etc.

22

0

As with all other music genres, some of it is excellent while most are crap!

1

Plus I was sharing Angelic upstarts and other early punk.

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