The more I date the more I am disappointed. And the more I am disappointed the more I learn I must keep going, as I did not try this long for nothing. Im learning to move on...when he doesn't call for three days after initially expressing alot of interest. Im learning to move on after he displays a side of his character that is objectifying, narcissistic, or lacking empathy. Im learning to move on after 6 months of dating and replaying the same conflicts over and over. Im ready to move on after 5 years of marriage when I finally give up in an exhausted sigh of defeat...my one real love dissolved to nothingness. I get up and I move on. I meet someone new. I try again and again and again. Because to give up I have already failed, but if I keep trying and keep believing there's always the chance someone will stick and all this effort will not have been pointless.
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61 comments (51 - 61)
Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.Maybe what you need is to take time off from dating. Take time to reinvent your priorities and you're not failing instead the guys are failing your needs. Being single because of the lack of the right match has adventages. I learned to date myself and I enjoy taking myself to restaurants, theaters, night clubs, travel, and etc
Cecilia2018
Level 7
July 6, 2019
1
Yes dating my self cinema seminars street fairs swimming pools the ocean the swans at the cemetery pond lectures @ Iowa State University presidential candidate events ....I get the impression no woman goes to my same places looking for a date OR THEY ARE LESBIAN not looking 4 me
@GreenAtheist , Strange, I think that too that there are not men looking for me because they are gays and looking for men.
I hate to break it to you but the cats only respond you to the "tone".. not the language
I haven't dated in a long while but would rather even have a friend to go to a restaurant, travel etc. Yes I long for that "togetherness" in a relationship again but not desperate at all costs just to be with someone. I have grown accustomed to my single freedom, my own space at my own pace but not ruling out being happy with someone again.
@rocwhy1 , I mentioned as a joke pretending to be a comedian. Sorry if my joke didn't make you laugh.
@TimeOutForMe , It's beautiful to be in a romantic relationship with the right match. I'm agree about not being desperate to be in a romantic relationship at all costs. I think patience is gold and like Monty Python said " Always Look on the Bright side of Life"
I admire your tenacity. I know the experience sucks though. I wish you the best.
TrailRider
Level 7
July 6, 2019
0
Unfortunately I think that dating is a bit like being a shark, if you don't keep moving forwards then you die.
Some things that I have discovered.
I, personally have to re-evaluate my expectations and make sure that I set them clearly for the ladies that I meet.
Honesty isn't always welcome, but it is the best course.
Been married before, don't want to do it again, but apparently that's a challenge - so don't even mention it.
Have fun, enjoy meeting new people, it beats the shit out of watching soaps 
Pompey
Level 6
July 13, 2019
0
"The more I date the more I am disappointed"
Um, either stop dating, or change your goals and priorities. You sound like Bette Davis. Everyone knows she was never ever actually happy.
MarkiusMahamius
Level 7
July 11, 2019
0
Yeah whatever. Betty davis was a bad ass rockin the rbf like a boss. No ones always happy.
It seems such a shame that it is hard for you to meet a person that seems more interested in you as a person rather than they as the major theme.
cloudymoon
Level 2
July 10, 2019
0
Love is a decision and it takes you in a certain direction. If it is lust or passion it dies off very quickly. People think they "click" when all of this just falls into place. Often I can allow it because of the way I view the other person. Just as often it is nonsense. In the world today it is often just different ways of trying catfishing.
DenoPenno
Level 9
July 8, 2019
0
Maybe you are trying too hard.
Jolanta
Level 9
July 7, 2019
0
no that's not it. I am not.
@Lauraleigh39 I'm tired of friends telling me I am "trying too hard". No, I'm with you. I'm just so tired of men showing interest, all gung ho, then boom, gone. I keep thinking it's me, but dang, it's them. I see my life coming into the home stretch of the last 20 or so years of this life, and I'm so tired of being alone. So tired of getting my hopes up, then being cut off at the knees again and again. So tired ...
@crazycat329 Why is it so important to be with someone?
@Jolanta I'm a social , but introverted human. I have a deep seated need to have someone close to me for intimacy and to go out and travel and do things with. I've been working at trying to do things on my own, but it just makes me feel sad , stressed and empty. Girlfriends are hard to pin down, as they have lives,too. I don't know why people are always questioning those of us who crave a partner. All humans are different, with different needs and personalities.
@crazycat329 certainly all are different and the reason people question and want to know is because they want to find out why some people feel that way, what made them feel that way, why they have such a deep need for it.
@crazycat329 i want to get well laid for one. I want sex and not with some random dude
@Lauraleigh39 I don't think any of us want sex with some random dude. We crave intimacy with meaning. Hard to find even with dudes that we know well.
Well at least you know yourself and are able to move on. It took me 15 years to end a bad marriage. You have 10 years on me!
Sartre was right: hell is other people. Recognizing this, you can make your quest secondary to your contentment. Seek value -- whether it comes from a significant other or not. Then if you stumble on Mr. Right, it's just icing on the cake.
mordant
Level 8
July 7, 2019
0
Can't believe what you're going through. I love to love and be as romantic as possible whilst keeping a firm grip on the problems reality brings. There must be a man/woman out there for you that will cherish you and make you feel loved, desired and supported.
Nardi
Level 7
July 7, 2019
0
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