We just grew apart. But I’m happy with my girlfriend now so it’s all good.

She was and is stuck: emotionally, physically, financially, sexually and job-wise. Too many years of trying/waiting for her to get her unstuck. If I was in my 20's or even 30's I might wait around to see if she can make some progress. I'm 55 and too old for this shit.

Because I didnt know what was required.

Lots of reasons, mostly bad reasons for getting married, a partner who though only one of us had to make any effort and then the final straw was that she believed god gave her a hug and held her and and she could no longer be with the atheist she married. That and she was not a happy person who thought, and I though, I could make her happy. You can't make other people happy, that was my big take away.

Which one?

I woke up one day and realized he's a misogynistic, controlling, narssistic sociopath who had been cheating on me for months... The day after I confronted him with the truth, he walked out on his family. Of course he called me crazy and every name other than my own... Moved in with his whore of a mistress... To think it took me 10 years of wasting my life to finally get my life back...

She wasn't who she thought she was and so wasn't who I thought she was. Then we kept trying to make it work for way too long. We get along fine now, but I am not sure much has changed.