I think ultimately I was weak, unassertive, and blinded by feelings, and she was selfish, a bad friend, and downright immoral.

Yeah, don't get married, and don't put up with any bull ever. People have their faults, but take it from a guy that is desperately trying to keep his life together for someone else's mistakes: marriage makes things obligatory. Once you get married, there isn't that same threat that you aren't going to put up with their bull and leave, and obligation will have you overlooking some things you shouldn't. And if they love you, marriage isn't going to be what solidifies that. It literally changes nothing except some paperwork and maybe social status, but it shouldn't do anything for your actual relationship, and if it does, it's probably a red flag.

And as someone experiencing this as a male, let me tell you that if things go south, in terms of relationships, you're probably going be way worse off than your female counterpart even if you did everything you were supposed to do and they messed it up because many women won't mess with a married guy, but most guys do not care. Just my advice.

My marriage failed because I was reared fundamentalist Southern Baptist and couldn't accept my sexual orientation, gay, until my 40s. Annnd she is truly 'cuckoo for cocoa puffs'. She's #MessianicJewish now after Methodism, Baptist, Presbyterian etc. 3 of our 4 children will have nothing to do with her. They've been seriously hurt by her religion(s).

We just grew apart. But I’m happy with my girlfriend now so it’s all good.

She was and is stuck: emotionally, physically, financially, sexually and job-wise. Too many years of trying/waiting for her to get her unstuck. If I was in my 20's or even 30's I might wait around to see if she can make some progress. I'm 55 and too old for this shit.

Because I didnt know what was required.

Lots of reasons, mostly bad reasons for getting married, a partner who though only one of us had to make any effort and then the final straw was that she believed god gave her a hug and held her and and she could no longer be with the atheist she married. That and she was not a happy person who thought, and I though, I could make her happy. You can't make other people happy, that was my big take away.

Which one?

I woke up one day and realized he's a misogynistic, controlling, narssistic sociopath who had been cheating on me for months... The day after I confronted him with the truth, he walked out on his family. Of course he called me crazy and every name other than my own... Moved in with his whore of a mistress... To think it took me 10 years of wasting my life to finally get my life back...

She wasn't who she thought she was and so wasn't who I thought she was. Then we kept trying to make it work for way too long. We get along fine now, but I am not sure much has changed.

Which one?

She decided she wanted a man who was home more and not working two jobs to pay the bills. Found out she had been auditioning my replacement for two years.

Breakdown of communication

My ex was the female version of Cletus Kasady.

We weren't in love and never should have married. She wanted to marry me because all her friends were getting married, I was successful and she wanted to stop working. We married on the condition we never had kids. She begged me to have kids after 5 years. She never loved them either, they were just a means of keeping her claws in me. Eventually kids and I left.
I married her because I had not dated much, had no idea what I was doing, was very immature and young. I had just turned 20 when it was all organised, she was a few years older.

ask my lawyer, only £60 per hour !

I think because she was verbally and physically abusive, that's about the size of it.

To say we grew apart is an understatement. He grew more conservative and religious and spent all his spare time with his hymnal website. The kids tell us we should have called it quits years before.

Alcoholism and verbal abuse to go along with it.

The Marriage concept is fundamentally flawed. My first 3 they became believers of a mainstream god, the fourth followed the god of methamphetamine. They all attempted to convert me, however, I failed to assimilate.

My first wife had sex with so many truck drivers that she could have gotten a teamster card. My second wife didn't like my son. Deal breakers.

I never wanted to be married in the first place. It just took me 20years to address it.

I continually dismissed the fact the woman was mentally ill. When in her right mind she was so loveable.

Because my spouse was a sociopath.

Because I finally woke up.

He was a racist and an unemployed nurse (LVN only) for the last 3 years of our marriage. Only reason we were together 9 years was because I knew I needed to work thru the anger before I filed or I’d be dead. Our son, who was 9 at the time, thinks so, too. He also decided not to talk to his father any more when he was 12.