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Too honest.

I feel like I've been too honest on here, lol. Like if there was a guy in my area that was interested....after he read some of my posts he'd be like "hell no!"

But at the same point, I kinda like being me. It's nice having a community where I feel like I can be completely honest, and while everyone may not agree with me, for the most part everyone is respectful.

So thank you guys for that!

Marcie1974 8 Mar 27
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24 comments

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11

I think it's better to be honest and get a 'hell no' than to pretend to be something you're not. One of the many problems with conventional dating dates is that you never know if someone is who and what they say they are, Agnostic.com seems to have reduced that

ipdg77 Level 8 Mar 27, 2018

Yep, I agree completely. I'd much rather just be myself and if someone isn't into me, that fine. Not everyone is going to like me. Just like I don't necessarily like everyone I meet. If I pretend to be something I'm not, the real me is going to come out eventually. Might as well be up front.

@Marcie1974 Unless the real you is a complete maniac in which case keep it under wraps for as long as you can lol

Yes, I agree as well. It's much better to be honest and real. One of the things that makes this site interesting and fun for me is that it is a combination of dating and a community forum on many topics. You can get a sense of what a person is like that you cannot get on a pure dating site. Maybe I'm naive but it seems to foster better communication.

@ipdg77 bwahaha! Maniac no. But I'm brutally honest about having depression and the struggles I've had in the past. Also I'm way to honest about sex.

@Marcie1974 It's part of makes you, you. It may not be much fun for you but we've all got bumps and bruises and kudos to you for being honest πŸ™‚

@TrailRider I think you're right, if I had commented about this on a regular dating site 99% of the time I wouldn't have got a response but @Marcie1974 replied, you commented and we've now exchanged, I think it's great πŸ™‚

7

Lmao I've thought the same thing! It is nice to know you can be honest! If/when I do get people interested, I wonder if they've really read some of my comments.

Yes exactly! Like she's the crazy one that said such and such. Stear clear!

5

Having a guy be like, "Hell no," after being exposed to your honesty, is far better than wasting precious time pretending. Only way to go, imo.

"I'd rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not." ~ Kurt Cobain

5

Yeah we all need that acceptance.

5

Being honest about who you are. Hell, even being aware of who you are is huge. That's got to happen for an honest relationship can happen.

5

I’d date you. Why not? You’re attractive, funny, intelligent...

Ahhh, thank you

5

Haha! Same. I legit can't believe anyone would hit on me after reading the shit I post here.

Even if we're too honest, the online forum is still a kind of safe place and we can 'hide' a bit so our comments probably don't condemn us too muchπŸ™‚

5

I think we're all in that same boat to a degree.

Yup

4

Well,think of our options.
That big blue site where your "friends" post their thoughts and prayers and pictures of jesus welcoming you into heaven and constant politcal opinions, or the dating sites where you're shown a picture and are supposed to make a snap judgment of whether they look good enough for you. I could go on about all the bullshit.
But we're here (hopefully) because we are done with the bullshit.

4

If you can't be honest then what else is there? Lying and bs that's what's there.

4

hmmm, pretty much given up dating sites, almost given up dating, or the idea of it.
I am honest on them, but probably more open here because it is (or I am) anonymous.

4

I'm a don't ask if you don't really want to know kind of person. I'm that way in person and online. I guess if that's going to make somebody say "hell, no!" that's their problem and I probably wouldn't put up with them anyway.

4

We are a little too honest and open here sometimes. It would be an easy thing to work up a personality profile on people here and use it to take advantage of us.

4

If he was so easily deterred, he is no loss.

3

I have been told I was "too honest for my own good". Mos tpeopel do want to hear little white lies that makes them feel better.

I think honest peopel need to acknowledge and respect differences in any partners they might get or have.

you woudl think tht peopel woudl wnat an honest partner, but it really doesnt' seem to be so.

On the bright side honest peopel are generally content beign single if peoel cant' accept them for who they are, and we are generally already happy and dont' need someoen else to "complete" us because we are already complete. Havign a partner will only enhance our alredy happy lives, and we don't 'need someoen else in order to feel happy.

3

I'm brutally honest anyway. At least people here still message me and talk to me instead of blocking me.

I've been blocked by four or five women. Since l am smartass l don t blame them. I don't know why they thought l would care. I'm shooting for double digits.

@Sticks48, I only block people who threaten me.

3

A lie has to last forever. don't be anyone but you. people will know exactly what they're getting.

3

As a great philosophical group once said:

There's only one thing that I know how to do well
And I've often been told that you only can do
What you know how to do well
And that's be you,
Be what you're like,
Be like yourself,
And so I'm having a wonderful time
But I'd rather be whistling in the dark

2

I just wasted two months only to find that the person was hiding that she was a control freak. Best to be completely honest and open.

Ugh sorry that happened

2

Never edit yourself here. If someone likes me then they have to take me warts and all. I'm not above changing but get to know the whole me before you run away. After that, you are free to run away.

2

I love this site for that, transparency, honesty is the key anyway. People get to read and write here much more than say on Match.stupidcom...here you can actually interact, opening freely and see (kind of) how people act in a crowd, once again 'kind of', not like in person, but better than those private messages imo anyway.

1

Honest is good... till the end of times.

1

you got to be yourself. if you candy coated it, it would be deceptive towards others and that could cause problems if there was someone who you might meet. i always believe honesty is the best policy. sorry for the cliche.

0

True. This is the first dating forum I've been on in years, and the first one when I was aware of my gender variables..i.e. my being being partially transmale, androgyne, demisexual, etc.

For that reason, I now don't know my sexual orientation. Before, cis hetero is what I thought I was, and all I dated. Now, I don't know who to like, or the rules.
Being demisexual, I can't depend on sexual attraction to give me cues.

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