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Today is World Bipolar day. All over Facebook I see people posting things with the hashtag #bipolarproud. I don’t know how this will sound, but I’m not bipolar proud. I hate this illness. I hate what it does to me. I hate that it literally impacts every aspect of my life. I understand the awareness part and how people need to understand this mental illness better. That I get. I used to try to educate people and be confident about it and show that it doesn’t make me different, but last year I slipped and said I had bipolar disorder at work and was treated differently and looked down upon afterwards. I’m not happy to have this. I wish I didn’t.

Bverret2012 6 Mar 30
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27 comments

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9

Of course, having an illness isn't something to be proud of. It's not an accomplishment to be bipolar. It didn't take any effort to acquire it. That's not the thing to be proud of.

You are still functioning, still moving forward, and overcoming the effects and stigma of your illness. You can sure as hell be proud of that!

JimG Level 8 Mar 30, 2018
8

I have bipolar and I ain't poud it sucks but my meds are working so all is good. Here is a little humor.

8

I understand. I am both a member of the LGBTQIA community and an autism mother. I am proud out of necessity. On days when I am weak, pride is not exactly happiness with one's lot in life, it is acceptance and strength to go on. It's piss and vinegar. Resilience. I am not proud to be gay, I'm proud to be openly gay in a world that wishes to quash me, so hush me, that asks me to hide. I'm not proud my son has autism.... I'm proud of the person he is and the strength he has every day to overcome his anxiety, stress, social issues. When someone takes pride in something that is difficult for them, something that they cannot help, they're not happy that it is there, they are telling it to fuck off in anyone who wishes to judge them around them to fuck off as well.

This is very well said.

8

It's okay to hate it. It sucks.

6

No one wants to have any disorder.
Awareness is great.

But pride? That confuses me.

I've never been proud of having cancer. Proud to survive it though. Maybe that's the meaning.

5

I too hate the disorder, I have a brother with it and it has wrecked our family and made my life worse for the past 56 years, well 55 of them.
It is bad, just this morning one of my neighbours told me that a couple of days ago, he saw something in the sand dunes, went to investigate and found a body hanging in the trees. I am pretty certain it is a guy I worked with briefly a few weeks back, (he was living in his car at that spot) bi-polar and ICE.

I had huge problems with him, almost ended up in a fight because I had to get him to leave the worksite when the local pre school visited. He was not cleared to work around children. Then that afternoon he was asking fellow staff to talk me into letting him move in to my place. I would drown him first, and also, this is a safe place, people come here when they have access and supervisory issues around custody.

His highs and lows were so hard to handle, claimed all sorts of qualifications. Knew everything. One day was going on about pruning our citrus trees, I told him no. Turned my back and he did it, all the fruit gone, trees were a mess, yet he insisted he was a horticulturist, which means that they do not actually need to be pruned and also if you decide to do so , you do it at the end of winter after they have fruited, not end of summer when they are beginning to fruit. I really hate this disorder.

I feel so sorry that you have it.This guy was proud of it, he would tell everybody I guess to get some leeway? Maybe one day there will be a cure. I hope so. Not trying to be a downer, a little shocked re the suicide, but also revealing how bad such a disorder is for those who suffer from it.

4

Tough one ... Very personal for everyone i would say. All i can say is find people who are suppportive. I am Epileptic.. Quite open about it but i find little point getting into deep conversations about it really. People can't comprehend what they don't feel or live day to day. I feel you. Distraction is your friend. It's good to keep saying what you are saying as long as it is acknowleging your pain & it doesn't become a mantra. Things do and can change so maybe you are transitioning? It took me about 40 yrs to find any peace personaly. I think you know the best answers as it's your thing and the most difficult part in life is getting help that doesn't make sense or when there is no direct answer or solution. It's just tough. An old friend used to say to me, "Life's hard then you die" when things were really tough .. I used to really fucking hate it but now i laugh .. it took me a while .. From my friends experience I think Bipolar is missunderstood .. i have a friend who did find stability in later life. People do tend to make throwaway comments with any difference which doesn't help does it. Try meditation. What you are saying does not sound bad at all ... Sometimes saying something really angry and acknowleging your feelings is a positive thing .. from darkness cometh light ;0 lol ... to quote the devil book we all hate on here.. but that quote kinda fits this situtaion i feel.. that feeling is there to be acknowleged and worked with over time imo.

4

Thank you! Your honesty is refreshing!

4

I agree with you; it's nothing to be proud of. It's a terrible disease, and I sympathize with you.

marga Level 7 Mar 30, 2018
3

knowledge and to educate ignorance is the key
knowing the unknown
hope this help

Rosh Level 7 Mar 31, 2018
3

I wouldn't be surprised if the majority of the people posting that are either self diagnosed or just don't have it . I get the make people aware of mental illness bit but being proud of something that makes your life hell nope just nope . I have a form of depression not sure what as different drs diagnose something different every time and I hate it I just want to be able to function on a daily basis not wonder how I'll be the next day

3

I have bipolar and I agree. I tell people I’m a chemistry set hoping the right combo of meds work (which at the moment are). Having bipolar is nothing to be proud of. It’s an illness and a painful one. Why would I be proud of pain? Why would anyone want to be in pain? I may not have physical pain but I sure as hell have mental pain. I’m on disability because of this illness and although I think I’ve gotten the right combo of meds and am having better days, I can’t go off disability. I’d have no insurance and wouldn’t get the current help I need. So I’d just end up where I started.

Taking the stigma away from bipolar is one thing. But being proud? No. Words are powerful and there’s a big difference between stigma and proud. I’m more concerned with the former.

3

The growing willingness to talk about mental illness is good, but it has led to some bizarre bits. I don't know of any actual bipolar sufferers who would be proud of it. Proud that they can function with it, maybe. Proud to manage it properly, but not proud to have it.
People are getting their ideas a little twisted. We should encourage open dialog, but not pride in an illness. Only pride in managing/overcoming said illness.

Word. i take a lot of inner pride that I've stayed alive this long living with it. Pardon my language, but it fucking sucks. I do support NAMI and other positive and informed support of people living with mental illness. But, especially on social media, people have NO clue.

3

I agree! I have major depressive disorder, as well as a few other mental health issues. I work hard every fucking day just to stay alive. There is nothing, other than recovery, to celebrate about Mental Illness. So glad I gave up FB awhile back.

3

I've had a roommate and a sister-in-law that are bipolar. I'm sorry you or anyone has to deal with that condition.

3

I know just how you feel, but mine was depression...possibly bi-polar! It is work, it had to be added to anything that I attempted to accomplish! And, yes I tried to educate people about my condition, that was work as well and didn't always help me! But, as I aged it did subside a lot and after I had back surgery last year, my condition has gone altogether! I feel like a new person! I wish this on everybody! I have no real explanation for the total turnaround! So it can happen! If it can happen to one person, then it should be possible for others!

2

sorry for the ignorance around you,

2

I tell on a need to know basis....but I think most people know I struggle with some sort of depression. I accept it as part of who I am, because I embraced the stigma of it during my youth which was unfortunate for me and damaging, and delayed a healthy living experience. Once I admitted my reality, and went thru trial and error of treatment...even in face of my relgious experience that taught me to look for faith healing, life became productive and good for me, even if all I accomplished was getting out of bed in the morning.

2

I commend you, I have a daughter in J-ville also with bipolar disorder, I just visited her and is doing great, best I seen her in many years. Thank you for sharing. Just remember how ignorant people around you could be. I wish you the best.

2

Why would you be proud of bipolar, why would someone even think they should have some sort of value from having something you didn't choose to have especially something that an illness. Creatans.

2

I don't get being proud like you just won a meddle either. I get depression, panic attacks and my back is fucked. it's not something to be proud of. is there a proud I got hit by a truck day? or proud I caught venereal disease day? proof that it isn't just religion that makes us fucking stupid I think.

2

My ex had a bipolar friend that actually caused us some problems. I think a lot of it was that my ex did not understand the illness but always took the woman's side when I tried to explain it. The woman in question may have been more than bipolar. She said a lot of things that just would not check out. It was her husband that explained her condition to me.

2

It does seems strange to be proud... I suppose it's because of the negative feedback people tend to get when they announce it. It's an awful thing to have to deal with. I'm all about the awareness. More people need to know about it and not be afraid to ask if they or others have it. And treat it accordingly.

1

I have had several bi-polar people in my life. Some are in denial. Some self medicate. One was my significant other for ten long years. TG we never got married legally. His mother and one of his brothers was bi-polar ( a friend and roommate afterwards) but he was in complete denial. Mood swings galore-he loved me or hated everything and cried about his dysfunctional family. I felt like I had to keep him happy at all costs. Finally after 10 years on and off he got physically abusive and I ended it despite his pleading he'd do rehab and never hit me again. I ended the cycle. That was 9 years ago.

1

I read about a guy who has a split personality and both his personalities are bipolar. Would that make him a quadrapolar?

It's no longer referred to as split personality. A lot has changed since it was called that. We no longer refer to split personality or multiple personality. The proper terminology is Dissociative Identity Disorder. If you care to read up on it and get better educated, I would encourage you to do so. There is no such thing as quadrapolar.

[en.wikipedia.org]

@Bverret2012 Did you laugh? Chuckle? Smile? Or did I strike out?

@Celestia """No such thing as a quadrapolar""???????? Sometimes the medical literature has to catch up with the clinical data.

@nicknotes I would be happy to read any peer reviewed research studies on "quadrapolar", within the scope of mental illness.

@Celestia I get it...you're a skeptic. You want proof. Would it convince you if I get my quadrapolar buddy to write you 4 emails?

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