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Any struggles with Atheism/Agnosticism?

The one issue that bothers me is knowing someday I'll be gone and will never see my daughter again. In one regard, it's extremely motivating and makes me get more done and be a better father while I'm alive. But I also get very down at the thought of dying and this beautiful life being over. I don't think about it much, and try to think about something else when it comes to mind.

Can anyone else relate?

MrHIT 5 Apr 2
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21 comments

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Given that most of my family is Christian Methodist, whenever there is a death in the family or a passing of someone we know, I often hear things about ascending into heaven or being in a better place. I always just think to myself that there's a good possibility that they are not in heaven. That they are just in the casket or vase of ashes. It's a hard pill to swallow, especially if you struggle with depression but I find comfort in knowing that I'm following a path that's based on facts and truth instead of a path of blind faith.

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If you decide to become a Christian, so you will see your daughter again after you die, so it wouldn't make any difference what you believe. Being a Christian does not make heaven. It doesn't matter if you believe in it or not, it is not so. Someday we all die. It will happen, and we won't see our loved ones again, no matter what we choose to believe.I would not pay lip service to something I do not believe in the hope of seeing a loved one after I die, if I know it is not true. However, that is only my opinion and my choice.

I agree. Wanting to believe in something is not sufficient cause. I am an atheist and don't believe in any afterlife because there is no evidence for it. This topic/thought I have is the only thing that saddens me about my beliefs.

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Why even think about it. It is one aspect of life that is going to happen and nothing can be done about it. Let it go and live your life as you see fit, loving your fellow humans and striving to do no harm or hurt anyone.

It's not a common thought of mine. But you're right I don't dwell on it.

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I didn't even think about death until it challenged me with a leukemia diagnosis 6 years ago. I raised two girls pretty much by myself and other than financially struggling to keep my house each month never thought about death until family started to go.

Thanks for your story. It's hard for me raising one child, I couldn't imagine multiple kids plus that diagnosis. Message me if you ever need to talk

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I too get depressed when I think of getting old and having to die. Or dying at a young age.

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Well, you won't have any regrets or memories just like before you were born. We just won't be.

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Yes, I've felt the same but you won't care because you will be dead. the beauty is the absolute nothing I hope is coming like sleeping and never waking up. I'm more bothered about how I die. remember with infinite time and space there are infinite possibilities.

Ayn Rand always said something similar about death. Lol. Thanks for your input

your welcome. no one gets out alive my friend

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That kind of struggle is why many people gravitate toward the fantasy that they'll see their loved ones after they die. You have the advantage of knowing you'd better make the most of every moment.

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The loss of relationships and creativity that we all will suffer has been described as the great tragedy inherent to our human existence. Perhaps one consolation is realizing that it is only a tragedy because of the great value of the loss. If the value was less, it wouldn't be such a tragedy. It's a paradox. Hope I haven't made things worse, but it is what it is.

Well said. Thanks for your insight.

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Isn't it better that you realized this truth early on, that this is your one life, so make the most of it now? Better than living your whole life and then on your dying bed realizing this truth too late and having huge regrets that you wished you would have done more?

You will be with your daughter after you are gone, in a way, as she will keep your special moments and memories, lessons shared, favorite places and activities close in her heart, carrying you with her for the rest of her life. I think it's very special that you are investing your time wisely with your daughter and accomplishing more things now, than simply waiting for an afterlife that may not come.

You did not exist in your current form before you were born, but some people can reach a sort of virtual immortality by the things they did with their life, affecting the world and the people in it, in big and little ways, leaving some wisdom or ideas in the minds of others, to be kept alive going forward.

Well said!

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I struggled with it quite a bit early on after accepting that I no longer believed.

It was offensive to me that it would just be over. That there was really no point in it.

I don’t have kids (personal choice). So there is nothing for me to pass on.

While I don’t believe I am worhtless or a simpleton, I am definitely not one of those few that have the ability to change the world.

I help a small number of people in my job, and like to think I am a good friend. That is not very far reaching though.

What’s left? What’s the point?

It took a while, but finally I said fuck it, I’m just going to have fun and enjoy what I can while I am here.

What still gives me pause, and makes me think about death occasionally is the limited time I have left. I’m 48, and a little pissed at myself that it has taken me this long to come to the realization that I have waisted a lot of my life just being and not living.

I am making changes though, and plan on living as much as I can with whatever time I have left.

Thanks for your story and your insight

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I think you have explained why so many take comfort in believing there is an afterlife. 🙂

Geoff Level 5 Apr 2, 2018
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Yeah had my boy when I was 39 kinda scary thinking I'll be 80 or dead when he's my age plus I haven't the energy to keep up with him some days .but yeah I do extra things with him to fully enjoy life as it is .

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Nothing is permanant. If there is nothing to sstart with there is nothing to end .
Live your life and enjoy your journey for what tomorrow brings we do not know but we can enjoy now present .

Rosh Level 7 Apr 2, 2018

I agree. Have to make the most of our time here

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For billions of years, you didn't exist. And, at some point in time you won't exist again. That's just the way things are. Be happy you're alive now. You can share your thoughts with others, and, through your daughters, you have a legacy you can pass on.

You have this tremendous opportunity. You exist, here and now. Every second you waste worrying about not existing takes away from doing something with meaning to it.

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Let go of being worried about it, it’s the fate every person who ever was or will be, our great fortune to have hit the life lottery. We go on as the DNA in future generations. When I was very young I was told religious stories, don’t think I ever believed, motions for the sake of culture... now I’ve let that go too.

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The reality is....reality doesn't care one way or another about our feelings. I agree that the thought of never seeing my son or daughter again is disheartening. So I try to make the most of my time when they are around me. Other than that I'm practicing the idea that it's so amazing that I was born a human in an amazing time and place. I'm a silent observer of the magnificence.....tc my friend

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The reality is....reality doesn't care one way or another about our feelings. I agree that the thought of never seeing my son or daughter again is disheartening. So I try to make the most of my time when they are around me. Other than that I'm practicing the idea that it's so amazing that I was born a human in an amazing time and place. I'm a silent observer of the magnificence.....tc my friend

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Everyone is in the same boat, but most are waiting for a reunion.

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I’ve had that same feeling when I was religious. I wouldn’t be able to watch my children grow! I do feel more value knowing this is all I got! At the end of the day it’s our greed for more time that fuels religion, and causes us to not value connections as much as we should. I have no grandparents. Two were dead before I was born. I was able to value 14 years with grandmother and 40 with a grandfather. 15 with a brother and 17 with my father. The real tragedy was never knowing my other grandparents or my kids not knowing my father. It makes the time that I have better.

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