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Is it possible for you not to judge people based on their appearance?

ladyinred1967 5 Apr 9

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1

The best thing that can be judged is a poor choice. Just because someone looks good does not make them smart.

4

I do judge both men and women based on their appearance. I think that’s human nature. BUT I have had a few very valuable lessons regarding that. So while I still make quick assumptions immediately upon meeting someone, I consciously redirect my thinking to be open minded despite appearances.

That actually makes me a bit sad because several years ago I harshly judged a woman based on appearances. Thankfully I got to know her and she was truly an amazing person. She was quite poor and had various ailments that made her unable to have a steady job. But she volunteered so much of her time to a variety of causes. Such a completely selfless person. I REALLY learned a lot about judging people through her. Sadly she passed from stomach cancer a few years ago. I will forever be thankful for all she taught me and wish I would have met her sooner.

3

I find it difficult if not impossible, but I am very judgemental. Hell, I judge myself.

3

I wish and I definitely try to not judge by looks alone. But the human animal is hardwired like that I think

3

I try not to. How do I know what anyone's individual circumstances are?
Could be that someone who is unkempt is having a bad day and just didn't have the
wherewithal to put much effort into it. Been there myself.
It could be laundry day.
I try not to judge. I'm not always successful, but I try.
Except for those who are obviously trying too hard to look like they're important, or better, by wearing all sorts of designer apparel. I judge the shit out them.

3

My instincts and habits send me whatever messages they want to, and I can’t ’not hear’ them, but I have learned I don’t have to believe them.

skado Level 8 Apr 9, 2018
3

Probably not. But I have developed a mindfulness about this and a reflex to apply "corrective" consideration, rather than heedlessly letting my mind run away with my awareness.

Me too!

2

No. If you couldn't do snap judgements, you might not be alive. Ignoring your instincts is never wise.

If you see some slovenly dressed, mean-faced guy with scars on his face hanging out in an alley and he calls you to come over, better keep walking, or quickly go into a store.

2

Everybody judges people as its natural but I wouldn't on looks alone.

2

I guess, for me, it all hinges on at least 2 things: (1) are we talking about their clothes or their bodies/faces, and (2) what we mean by judge. I definitely make assumptions (that may be wrong) about people based on their clothes. If they're wearing a sports-team jersey, I assume they're into that sport and team... if they're wearing a MAGA hat and an NRA T-Shirt, I probably won't try to make friends with them! If they're bodily handsome or ugly, there's little I can tell beyond that. Of course, if one's looking for a romantic partner, some level of base physical attraction has to be there... but there's someone for everyone in this big world!

2

I try not to, but it can be difficult some times. It also depends on what kind of relationship you have, or plan on having with that person. I usually don't judge random people that I pass by, but if I'm going to be friends, or if I'm interested in dating that person, then it matters more, whether it should or not.

2

Sure. Get to know them.

2

A quick answer, no.

A more specific answer is that it’s completely possible to judge people not only on their appearance. The reason we make snap judgements based on how someone looks is because it’s an evolutionary thing. As a society, we base our views on how we describe beauty. But as individual humans, we judge people on how we view them if they are beautiful/handsome or unattractive. Of course, we would rather talk to someone who we find attractive.

But, if we find them looking snobby, we assume they are going to be a jerk.

I mean, this is all basically my opinion factored in with some facts.

BUT! I am still willing to meet someone and try to talk to them and see if they are cool to me. I don’t want for looks to ever be the sole reason I don’t talk to someone or try to learn more about them.

Agreed. I think it's hard wired. Judging isn't bad so long as you don't treat someone differently. We judge everything in life, food, clothes, preferred pets... the list goes on.

2

Based on this pic your an avid reader, you have no less than two cats and you know I’m kidding.

2

I assume people with tattoos and piercings are my kind of people lol everyone else sucks lol jk

2

Try not to judge anyone for anything.

2

YES!!!! It's possible .. we probably all revert to it at some points momentarily - even if we practice conciously otherwise.

2

Yes.

And no.

We all make our initial assessments of a person we meet within 7 seconds of meeting - If I can be bothered later I'll see if I can find the source - but we can train ourselves to see past stereotypes and listen to make informed judgements.

It's generally people who don't see themselves as 'normal' or 'mainstream' who find this easier to do as they have often been discriminated against because of their looks or fashion choices.

A quick search came up with this from 2006 (somewhat after I did my degree!!!) that brings the initial judgement down to a tenth of a second.
[journals.sagepub.com];

2

we all judge, everything and everybody, its human nature.

1

I would distinguish gut feeling and judgment. When I see someone, I experience feelings which may be strong or vague apprehension, delight, dislike, approval, attraction etc. However, if there is any communication between us, I have learned to adopt a nutral "business" like approach because I do not want my gut feeings to determine my attitude towards the person. Of course the occasion would also impact on my overall attitude. In general, I practice not to allow any negative "vibes" I have about someone to determine how I treat him/her.

1

Like me, you have asemetrical nostrils...
it sounds like you’re asking a simple question, but it’s far more complex than appearance

I have this. Please tell me it's an indication of late-onset brilliance.

1

Perhaps we are hardwired from birth - [newscientist.com]

A hardwiring reinforced by experience and learning received as the skewed data base is built in the developing brain. Given the propensity for much of the world to commence religious indoctrination from an early age and how that biases belief ...

1

From green tomatoes to brown snakes to potential mates, we're inherently programmed to assess things on visual and initial appearances.

This is millions of years of evolution at work.

Add on a layer of cognitive, behavioral, and social biases and you're always going to make judgments.

Actual contact may change that perception, but initial biases are going to be there.

1

For me it depends on the context in which I meet them. I recently met a retired police officer and I met him through couch surfing so he welcomed his home to me. The first night me and a few friends went out to a hotspring with him and had a great time. Before I went into his home I had no idea his former profession and not that I'm some criminal but I get uneasy around police and didn't know any personally. Being a gentle and funny man he really changed my perception. I looked at him later and if I had known what he was before I met him I would have judged him from the start in a negative and unfair way. So the context in which I meet people can really shift my perception.

1

Social scientist suggests the we are all biased by appearances. Consider the Baby-face Bias for one. But knowing this we can all take actions to minimize those influences. That’s one of the good arguments against including any photos on a job application. And that is why many organizations do “blind” interviews; musical auditions are often done behind screens to hide the gender and appearance of the performer.

1

I make assessments, if I think someone is tall or short for instence. There is never any judgement based on appearance as to what they are like as people. Some of the wealthiest people I have met dress like bums.

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