My ex wife... I don't think I would had those three wonderful kids without her. Plus she gets half of my military pension. Now, I admit that if I would had followed this "Flame" to the West Coast. My life would had been Very Different today. Same could be said if I would had Stayed after military retirement with my German GF in Deutchland... my life would had been Very Different. So sometimes We Refuse a Different Life. Same could be said with GF nr one and GF nr two. No Engagement and Marriage to live in Puerto Rico. I had Refused and before I am gone I am going to tell again someone Special "Thanks, but No Thanks". And then again, maybe this time I will be ready to understand "Last Call means Last Call".

I met someone after my divorce that changed me in a lot of ways. It's kind of a long story though.

An ex almost 20 years ago. A brilliant and stunningly attractive girl took a brief interest in me and convinced me that women don't hate sex. She was the catalyst for so many changes in my life, some good, some bad and most traumatic.

When I was 16, I was sleeping in a hospital lobby and a nurse took me home with her for the night. I don't even know for sure what town we were in but the words snake river come to mind.

It was years before I fully understood the risk she took since she had an infant at the time.

I think my best friend in High School, Maria, helped me become independent and stand up to my dysfunctional and abusive family eventually leaving home in high school. She taught me not to take money, education and family for granted. She and her family didn't have much but I became part of their family when I needed one.

My ex. After 5 years, he started becoming a drug abusing idiot who liked to sucker punch me, steal my bank card, etc. Breaking up with him has made me the strong person I used to be prior to dating him. I allowed myself to be a doormat when I certainly was not raised to be one. My whole life has changed for the better.

Not in person. But, my life has been significantly changed by contacts with the writings of some remarkable people -- Jean Paul Sartre, Jean Piaget, Hermann Hesse, John Gardner, among others..

My ex and my daughters, of course. But there was a person who was a catalyst for a major change in my life. That person did not change my life. I did. I'm grateful to the catalyst for me finding myself. My real, uninhibited, caring, loving self.

God, he taught me what a great liar religious people are. now I am an athiest.