It is almost impossible to scam me. I come off as meek and mind to almost everyone. Some people take this as stupidity. I read situations and people like reading a book. Many people avoid direct answers to questions or side step things for a reason. She turned out to be one of them. Imagine for a moment that we had met on Facebook and not on Meet Me. The outcome could have been the same.

She reminds me a bit of the men who are looking for a nurse with a purse. Objectively, it seems like no woman in their right mind would ever volunteer to be that for a sick old man, but that's the thing, there actually are people out there, both men and women, that aren't in their right mind, on the dating sites, that are so desperate that they will volunteer to be used by someone like this woman, all in order to avoid the loneliness of being without a partner. Glad I'm sane enough to take a hard pass on that.

You could see by her teeth that it was starting. Once that happens there is no repair. In her Facebook posts that went back a few years she looked good.

@DenoPenno Didn't your mom ever tell you not to talk to strangers?

I can identify with your every word. Of course, one of my problems is that I do not want to go anywhere. When not working I am usually home binge watching shows. I've traveled enough and damned near partied enough.

@DenoPenno I guess we are different in that respect. I really miss traveling since my late wife got ill, and would love to start doing that again with a partner. As for partying, I never did that much since I was in my 20s, and don't miss it at all either, same as you. But as a non-drinker, no matter how open-minded and tolerant I am about dating a moderate drinker, it seems like very few women who are social or moderate drinkers are ok with dating any non-drinker, no matter what my mindset, because social drinking is the center of their social life with friends and family, and I would not "fit in" well enough for that, even tho they would have a built in DD with me. So, nothing I can do, because so many women in my dating pool have lots more men to choose from besides me, that are more mainstream in culture and lifestyle, and check every box in their rigid, narrow, stupid long list of traits that have nothing to do with what is in someone's heart, their relationship track record, their relationship skills, and their communication skills, all of which are my strong suits in what I can offer a partner, but that matter very little to most women in my dating pool, who are divorced and have never gotten any therapy.

So they keep repeating the same poor choices in who they date and instead blame all of it on the men they choose, rather than getting therapy or looking at their own poor choices and their even poorer criteria for choosing a dating partner..

I would be willing to even try LD dating with someone who lived in Minneapolis or Chicago, even, but it's not worth even bothering to look into, again, after exploring it a few years ago, because it would be a dead end. The women in those two cities, or anywhere else that far away that might have some things to do where they live, are not interested in dating LD, or ever moving to my area, so what's the point in even looking into that? Anybody living in a better place than Des Moines, like Minneapolis or Chicago, usually already has family and friends they don't want to leave behind, same as my friends I have here, and even if they are retired like me or soon to retire, why would they want to move away from a better place to live like there, to live in a place like Des Moines, which is not as good? The answer is, they won't, because single women my age are usually not as interested as men are in making sacrifices just to add a partner relationship to their lives, esp. if they already have good relationships where they live with family and friends. And I am not willing to risk moving away from all my local friends, who are my only real family or support system. So I am just as stuck as you are, with my local online dating pool as the only way to find another partner.

I agree with you that there are good people out there in every online dating pool, even in a limited geo area of, say, 60 miles or less. But the thing is, online dating is also competitive, and in my case, for example, there are over 3 men for every woman that is in my age range and local distance limit of 60 miles, in my local Match dating pool. So, finding a partner means not only finding someone compatible on paper, in the local online dating pool, but also winning the competition between me and the other men in my age group that share that local geo dating pool on the dating site.

Organic dating is way easier and less competitive, because in that sphere, all you have to do is meet someone while they are available and interested in dating, and if you meet their minimum compatibility requirements, and vice versa, you are on your way to dating them steadily. In online dating, you need to not only meet those things, but also end up being chosen by them over all the competition, and vice versa, so it's a wonder that anybody who is average looking is able to ever find a partner who is at least average looking, because all of the variables would seem to work against that happening. Since research studies have shown that both men and women seem to put all of their interest and effort into only trying to online date those who are better than average looking. So average looking men, who make up the majority of online dating singles, are pretty much out of luck against the guys who are 7s, 8s, and 9s in looks, because even the average looking women, who are the minority gender on dating sites, about one third, put about all their interest in the great looking guys.

@DenoPenno My friend near Nashville, Danny, told me that he went on a long drive once and ended up on the backroads of Missouri. He said he came upon some of the most hellacious properties and people. He wasn't even sure where he was, but glad to get out of there.

We're both small town boys and drive plenty of country roads. He said he'd never seen anything like it.
Your descriptions immediately brought his story back to me

@twill Sounds like Deliverance, only without the mountains and the banjo music.

Same as living in Iowa, only MO is worse. Fewer liveable places there, as far as culture, lifestyle, and politics, compared to Iowa. Mo has Columbia, St. Louis, and KC, nothing else. At least Iowa has several places that are liveable. Mississippi and Alabama are worse than either state.. as well as probably some of the largely rural western states where I would never be willing to live.